


Glitch In The System

by soueikaku



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: 2nd POV, Abuse, Alcohol, Angst, Blood, Death, Drug Use, Extremely Slow Burn, F/F, F/M, Flashbacks, Gender Dysphoria, Gore, M/M, Mental Abuse, Mental Illness, Multi, Multiple Timelines, Murder, Mute Frisk, PTSD, Past Rape/Non-con, Physical Abuse, Rape, Reader Is Not Chara, Reader Is Not Frisk, Reader becomes a cyborg, Reader has physical illnesses, Reader is 19, Reader is mentally ill, Second POV, Self Harm, Slow Burn, Sort Of, Suicidal Tendencies, Time Shenanigans, Trauma, True Pacifist Run, you get robo legs
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-11-10
Updated: 2018-05-31
Packaged: 2019-01-31 13:39:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 26
Words: 77,903
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12683031
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/soueikaku/pseuds/soueikaku
Summary: Your name is Jacqueline. You have a semi decent college life, along with a loving boyfriend and amazing friends. When you pour your daily tea, your life seems to, well, take a turn. For the worse or better? That’s for you to decide.





	1. Dawn

**Author's Note:**

> hewwo. ive had this idea for a fic for about uhhh a year and a half or so, and since im decently confident with my writing skills lately, ive decided to finally write it out.
> 
> hope you enjoy!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maybe that just isn't what you were expecting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [tumblr](http://madjicks.tumblr.com)

You had begged him with anguish, over and over again, for him to stop. But, no matter what, he wouldn’t. He kept going and going, relentless in his actions, bruising the area around your pelvis with his weight. He wouldn’t respond to your cries of pain, he wouldn’t respond to you violently trying to shake out of your restraints, he wouldn’t do anything. You were left there helpless, simply a ball of tears left to be brutally violated by the one you loved. You gripped the sheets, desperately grasping for even the slightest bit of sanity. He probably couldn’t hear you, too off in his own world of selfish pleasure, even though he was ruining you. The only thoughts you could keep running through your broken mind were downright lies, and you self consciously knew it. He’s doing this because he _loves_ you. He’s doing this because he’s _frustrated_ and it will make him _happy_. This was all you could process in this moment of trauma. All you really knew was that all you could feel was agony and despondency, downright betrayal in so many more ways than one. Your face was drenched with tears, and sweat from disquietude. This wasn’t pleasurable to anyone but him.

He grabbed your legs and yanked you into a different angle, causing the bone in your ankle to respond with a violent snap. You let out a blood-curtling screech, pain surging through your body on top of what he was doing right now. The thing is though, is that bones can heal, your mental state would not ever fully recover from this. Mental scarring and bloody tissue inside your body, causing permanent damage to the parts you didn’t want in the first place. You were in a state of broken misery, trying to decide if you wanted to give up yet. Your body was tired, and so was your mind, so all you could really do was wait for it to end. Your body went limp, not even bothering to struggle in fighting back a fight you could not win anymore. He laughed at you, and spit in your face for “giving up so easily”. You didn’t have a witty retort like you usually would have, all you could do was simple lay there with glazed over eyes. You didn’t even feel as if you were in this body, since the pain had instantly vanished, and you watched the scene from a farther view. _Dissociation_. You were familiar with it, something your body did when nothing else would work. Your mind felt numb, so you simply watched the scene with a blank face, lips slightly parted and eyes half lidded. You couldn’t do anything, and you accepted your fate to this horrible event.

You attempted to process another emotion, yet it was pointless. All you could really feel was the familiar state of insensibility, the plight you felt after traumatic events. You didn’t feel sad, you didn’t feel mad, you just felt broken. Like a wind-up toy that lost its wind, still and quiet. Not a monkey clashing its toy cymbals together to make an erray of grating noises, just a monkey with a blank face of chinese paints, held in an existence of stillness. That was exactly what you were right now, no energy to move on, since you were being destroyed by a naive child; One who should know better than to hurt others.

You snapped awake, forehead pouring with persperation. Your face was sticky with the streams of tears that were apparent from your nightmare, hands clenched tightly around the nearest thing you could find. It was fabric of some sort, you couldn’t tell in your state of panic. You were screaming, night terrors crawling over to your consciousness, causing your throat to burn. When you jerked up, you were hit in the head by another. The person fell back, hands cradling their nose from the sudden impact. They mumbled a word of discomfort and pain, and you immediately felt remorse from your violent reaction. You let your damp eyes adjust to the darkness of the room, only to realize who had been there. You felt an immediate surge of fear, realizing they had, indeed, been the person in your dreams. They put a hand to their nose, trying to stop the bloodflow you had caused. You couldn’t help but flinch at the action, your fight or flight response almost activating. “Are you alright, sweetheart?” He mumbled through his hands, lowered eyebrows emoting his concern for your well being, and all you could do was cover your mouth and let out a broken sob. Your eyes showed the fear you held towards him, and he seemed to understand. “May I?” He said as he hovered a hand behind your back, the other clasping his face, but more focused on asking for silent permission. You nodded hesitantly, prompting a hand sliding up and down your back as an attempt to soothe you, and you accepted it. His hands were so warm, and you sighed with a shaking body to make it more of a shudder.

“I...I’m so sorry... I didn’t mean to wake you up...or hurt you, for that matter...” You cried, hands lightly dancing along the ends of his boxers, trying to distract yourself by examining and feeling the material between your rough fingers. He had your favorite color ones on, and your ripped up fingertips dug a bit more harsh into the smooth fabric. He eventually moved his way up from your back to your hair, gently untangling the locks with such delicate care. You were thankful to have him here with you, treating you as if you were a precious doll. You sat there and stared into the darkness, parting your lips to apologize more. He shushed you, whispering simple reassurances that everything was peachy keen now; he was here, and he was here to keep you safe. You couldn’t supress the soft flutter in your chest, quietly laughing under your breath at the response. All you could do was quietly cry with a broken smile into your hands, happy that it was a dream, afterall. He was still untangling your long hair, he knew how happy it made you. His fingers were gentle as they lightly massaged your scalp, humming a soft tune that you were familiar with.

 _A La Lune_ , your personal favorite of the songs you played in your very first year of marching band. He knew that it made you happy, so hearing his rich voice hum it as he stroked the strands of your hair made you feel even more content. Suddenly, he put his hands on the sides of your head, causing you to jump slightly.

“Baa dum bum, ba da ba BUM, ba da ba BUM—“ He turned your head to the left and right with each exaggerated BUM, mimicking how in the show, everyone squatted to that beat. You laughed with each head turn, genuine happiness accompanying it. You played along, singing the melody, queueing him in to do the harmony since he was proficient in bass instruments. He caught on and did it, while you simply sang the part for the clarinets’. It was a little song and dance between the two of you, your fingers pointing in opposite directions to the half time beat. You both would make eye contact when there was an exciting and exaggerated part, smiles large on your faces and enthusiasm present.

Both of you mildly out of breath slumped back into the couch, wheezed laughs accompanying the action. You both settled down, trying to catch your breath after the little event, smiles still apparent on your faces. After this, you rolled over to him, and slung an arm over his chest. He let out a playful oof, causing you to giggle once more.

“I’m sorry, Friz. I didn’t mean to make you hurt.” You stared at his nose, seeing as the blood still dribbled from it. You felt deeply sorry, especially after the nightmare breaking your securities. He laughed lightly and stared at you, nonchalantness still present. “It’s alright, love. It happens.” He replied groggily, rubbing the fatigue out of his heavy eyes. He winced lightly when his hand ghosted his nose, and you felt mild concern. You put your hand to his nose. He winced again, reflexively grabbing your wrist, causing you to back away. “Should I go grab some cotton balls? I’m super sorry.” You mumbled the last part, looking down at the non vacuumed floor, suddenly having a very large interest in the textile. “That would be appreciated.” He said heartily, kind of dampened by the guise of trying to hide how much it truly hurt. It reminded you of when he used to power through the issues with his knee when you two were younger. “I’ll be back soon,” you said, pushing yourself off of the couch, “be careful.” You warned, you didn’t want him to get hurt any further. You made your way upstairs into the bathroom, and flicked the light on. It caused you to flinch at first, your eyes only just have adjusted to the darkness. After rubbing the stars free, you opened them once more. You crouched to the floor and dug through the cabinet underneath the sink, trying to find your first aid kit.

Once you found it, you put in the combination (it was more like a lockbox than a first aid kit), and flipped it open. The tweezers, peroxide, and cotton balls were conveniently on top, and you let out a sigh of relief. Plucking them out of the box, you set it on the side of the ceramic seat with a clunk. You broke the tab off of the brand new bottle of peroxide, and put it in the trash. Flicking the light off, you grabbed your materials off the sink and made your way back down the steps.

Your boyfriend had still been in the same position as before, but his legs were now covered with the blanket. You stared at him lightly, and then made your way over to the couch.

“Alright, this may hurt a little,” you said while placing the materials on the coffee table, “but, I’ll do my best for it not to.” With a light grimace on your face, you opened the bag of cotton balls and put the top of the bottle of peroxide to one. You tilt it over quickly, somewhat dampening the top of the cotton ball. You grabbed the dry side of the cotton ball with the tweezers, and gently blotted it against his nose. He noticeably winced everytime you did, causing minor remorse to weave it’s way through your mind. Soon you were finished cleaning up the dry blood, and the area had seemed to clot, so it needed no further attention. You discarded the used cotton balls, and put the cap on the peroxide bottle.

“Do you happen to know what time it is?” You asked while cleaning up the supplies you’d brought down, running a clorox wipe along the tweezers. “Time for me to head home?” He joked, wide open grin across his face, exaggerating his jest. You laughed along just a little, and let a small smile rest on your face. “Maybe not yet,” You whispered, “just a little while longer.” You made your way back upstairs, putting the things back into your lockbox. Quickly making your way downstairs, you couldn’t help but have minor anxiety pool in your stomach. _What if he was mad at you for what you’d done?_ It asked, and you quickly tried to ignore it. He would understand, we’ve all had drastic reactions to hyper realistic nightmares before. But, you couldn’t help but worry about how he felt.

“I think it’s about 6am? Don’t quote me on that, though, my phone is charging on the kitchen counter.” He finally replied, causing your anxiety to melt away. You stared at him longer than you usually would, and then jerked away, slipping your thumbs into your waistband. “Alright. Would you like some tea or coffee? I might have the latter, but I’m unsure.” He seemed to contemplate his response, before shrugging. “Doesn’t matter to me, I’m good with whatever,” He paused, folding his arms together. “Hell, I might just go back to sleep. As long as that’s alright with you.”

“Sure.” You chirped, making your way to the kitchen and navigating your way to the light switch. It was the overhead for the sink, so it didn’t project too much light, perfect for early morning wakeups. You had forgotten to flick it on the previous night, silently cursing at yourself for not doing so. You heard the couch shift, and you figured he had gone back to sleep. That was fine, you were used to waking up early due to your insomnia or your internal clock, somehow thinking you were still in high school. Which also made no sense, since you always woke up at 5:30 back then.

The kitchen was rather simple. It had a dinner table that was round mahogany, something your great grandparents gave to you in inheritance. It was surrounded by four chairs, each having its own customized cushion. You’d sewn them in your first year of college, since you still mildly retained your Home Ec. skills. It had a lace tabletop draped over it, and four coasters for each chair.

You rarely ever had visitors stay for meals, so your table didn’t sit too many people. You usually ate outside anyways.

Your counter had a rack with cereal and produce on top of it, occasionally having a bag or two of chips. You had a knife block that wedged the rack and cutting boards together. Your sink had a drainer next to it, along with a coffee brewer and then a toaster. You weren’t too fond of coffee, but it was when you were running low on Ritalin, and needed coffee as a stim.

Your oven and stove had been all in one, a pair of silver pots stacked on eachother and a kettle always atop of it. Your microwave was above the stove, paired with fans for when your cooking got a little too heated. That usually only happened on the rare occasion of something you called Stir Fry-day. On your tip toes, you gently grabbed the tea bags from the cabinet, and selected from the variety of them. It’d been caffeinated raspberry, your personal favorite of your stock. You put the tupperware lid back over the container, and slid it back into the brew cabinet.

You grabbed your red kettle off of the stove, and moved yourself over to the sink, presumably filling the metal teapot with water. After reaching a few centimeters from the top, you put the lid on, and put it on top of the middle burner of your stove. Putting the temperature on high, you let out a sigh, and allowed yourself to check your phone.

You’d been pleasantly surprised to find that you had semi recent texts from your best friend, Lilly. She had sent you an oddly long paragraph describing her new application to college. You laughed heartily, suddenly startled by the screaming of the kettle. You grabbed one of your oven mitts, and grabbed the kettle, simultaneously letting the tip of it open to stop the grating noise. You placed it softly in the sink, letting it cool off in a safe place. You then resumed your readings of your text messages, trying desperately to decipher the huge chunk of text while you were still half unconscious.

ଘ(੭*ˊᵕˋ)੭*:･ﾟ✧  
**Today** 3:04 AM  
\- Dude.  
\- I think I might get accepted into this one, they said they accept LGBT students easier. Some sort of equality thing, sort of how they make PoC get easier scholarships? I don’t know.  
\- Are you even awake.  
\- Oh my god, I doubt you’re even awake.  
\- Fuck.  
\- I should stop sending messages.  
\- I always forget you have a good sleep schedule.

You couldn’t help but laugh at her frantic texting, her keeping that trait from the first logs you two had ever sent eachother. It was in the middle of eighth grade, you two meeting in art class. The thing about your relationship with her was that everyone always claimed that it would never last, yet, you made sure to have it last. The two of you had never really quarreled with eachother, never really had any bad fights, or general things that seemed constant between other people with best friends. She was a great person, even if she was always a year behind in school and birth dates, but that wasn’t because she was dumb. When you two met, you had been an eighth grader, but she had been a seventh grader. You were never really one to discriminate, especially when you were supposed to be in those grades.

Snapping yourself out of your trance of nostalgia, your fingers flew across your phone’s screen, typing a reply to her inquiry about potential college’s for her to enter into.

\- yeah sorry!! i had friz over and passed out. didnt really have the chance to check my phone  
\- hes passed out on the couch atm tho

You didn’t expect her to respond since it was still the lingering hours of daylight, especially due to her waking up near noon. You wished your body would grant you that blessing, but sadly it did not. Letting  
out a sigh, you relaxed your tense body, just now realizing how bad it had truly become.

You poured the hot water into a mug, and put the tea bag into it. You put in a dash of sugar, and a teaspoon of honey. You watched as you dipped the teabag into the mixture, eyeing the swirls of red that mixed into your mug. It was beautiful, and helped your mind fall into a blank haze. You simply stared at the tea, not even really focusing on it anymore. You had zoned out, and it was oddly pleasing for your somewhat limp form. You jerked back to reality, body snapping back into working once more. You let out a yawn, and your eyes grew heavy with fatigue.

What had just happened? It felt almost as if you felt a pulse course your body and make you feel forcefully relaxed and tired. You squinted at the mug, only to realize it had almost gone cold. You looked up to your microwave, finding it was now about 7:30.

What?

You felt downright confusion plague your state of mind, and stared at your hands. They had been clammy and pale, causing your eyebrows to furrow. What’s going on? You looked up at the entrance to the kitchen, and nothing was different. Everything was in place, and your boyfriend had still been passed out on the couch with a loud snore. You were still put off by the events that had just taken place. You pulled your phone out of your pocket, and near flinched when it said it was 9am.

_What?_

You stared at your phone in horror as the time rapidly sped by, minutes seeming like milliseconds. You looked at the sky in fear as the sun flew throughout the sky, the backdrop flashing with colors. Your eyes were wide and bright, you crying in confusion now. The tears seemed nonstop, pouring down your face like heavy rainfalls.

You were screaming, grabbing your long hair in downright fear from what was happening. All you could think about was why, and how to stop it.

So you decided you would put an end to it.

You darted out the door in terror, not bothering with shoes or proper clothing. Nothing, absolutely nothing. All you had were tight ended black sweatpants that had a thick and thin white line on each leg. You had a front clip maroon bra, but clothing didn’t matter right now. All you could think about was how to stop this. Going outside, you didn’t even care about what was going on. You just ran.

Ran straight up into a territory surrounded with barbed wire. That wouldn’t stop you though, you felt hysterical by what was being shoved through your mind. You kept running, not bothering to flinch at the burrs and mini shards of glass digging into your bare feet. All you could focus on was running away.

You threw yourself up the fence with anguish, climbing almost as if your life depended on it. You didn’t care about the pain surging through your body from grabbing onto barbed wire, but all you could truly process was the pounding migraine screaming in your brain. You threw yourself up and over the 7 foot fence, and ran into the woods of the mountain you had been climbing.

It had been fenced off a few years back due to disappearances of children, never coming back. You figured you could join them in their no evidence facades, as you charged up the mountain like gravity hadn’t pushed against you.

There it was. The gaping hole where they had all went.

You stared down into it, seeing nothing but an endless dark, almost as if there had been a portal to the void itself here. Everything had still been spinning in the atmosphere, like the sky being a pinwheel in a hurricane.

With a cold murmur, you leaped into the hole, hoping for death to welcome you in cold arms.


	2. Dusk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Meeting giant goats and flower just wasn't on your agenda.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [tumblr](http://madjicks.tumblr.com)

_‘Hello.’_ __  
  
Your eyes gently fluttered open, somewhat struggling against the weight pulling them down. You had been roused from your slumber by an almost overbearing voice that echoed all around you. Once your vision had returned, you blankly stared to the front of you, only to notice there had been someone. It seemed like it had been the one speaking to you.  
__  
_‘How are you?’_  
  
You couldn’t help but simply stare at the adolescent that, quite literally, _floated_ , in front of you. You inferred that the voice had been coming from it, even though when it spoke, its mouth stayed still in a smile. It had blank red eyes, light absent from them. Its skin had been pale, and its cheeks rosey. Its hair was a messy bob, auburn bangs framing its face rather naturally. Its legs had been crossed, arms hanging limply behind. It wore a yellow buttercup above its left ear, and a knitted wool green sweater with a single yellow stripe bordering the middle. It had brown jeggings and dark brown boots, fur lacings the tops. The boots had a weaved pattern along the sides, giving them a faux braid. The being stared at you, eyes unblinking. You didn’t really have a response, so you simply remained there in the black area, seemingly being the last thing you saw before your not so gracious swan dive.  
  
_‘Don’t you know how to greet a new pal? I asked you a question._ **_How are you_ ** _?’_  
  
It folded its hands over its lap, and a single black... Tear? fell down its left cheek, quickly slipping off and hitting the floor like a raindrop, the floor below responding as if it were water. You were puzzled beyond belief.  
  
You stared at the being, before opening your mouth to speak. “I’m...” You paused, putting your hand to your mouth. “I’m here.” You mumbled curtly, still somewhat off-put by your newfound atmosphere. The child in front of you closed its eyes, followed by a seemingly breath filled laugh.  
  
_‘I see. You have a sense of humor.’_  
  
Its voice was intimidating to say the least, and you couldn’t help but just stare into its ruby red pupils, finding nothing but beauty in them. You had always dreamed of having red eyes, even so much as buying expensive contacts to try and replicate it. You were jealous of this child’s natural eye color, somewhat wanting to...  
  
Rip out its eyes and use them for replacements of your own.  
  
_‘I also see you have taken a liking to my eyes.’_  
  
You were slightly shocked by it seeming to have read your thought process, but not too frightened since its voice seemed to show off its power overall.  
  
_‘Even wanting to do drastic measures, such as ripping them out and using them for your own selfish pleasures.’_  
  
You looked up at it, and stared with nothing but cold. You felt almost... Compelled, to harm this kid. The way it spoke was as if it thought it was better than you.  
  
_‘I see that hatred in your eyes. Have I said something you didn’t like?’_  
  
You simply continued to stare at it.  
  
_‘That would be a yes. Well, that just means you’re perfect for our little scenario.’_ It paused, letting its legs drop to the hypothetical floor with a splash. Its other eye seemed to start pouring black tears now, causing your body to seize. You felt as if you couldn’t move at all.  
  
It walked up to you, and a glowing red blade materialized into its hand, and it pushed it gently against the bottom of your chin. It seered the skin, but you felt no pain.  
  
_‘My dear Frisk has been awaiting an anomaly such as yourself to come around. Foolish young adults committing suicide because a little playing around with the rules of space being too much for them. You’re a fool, coming down here.’_ It laughed demonically, its limbs glitching out into various places. You were stuck in your spot, nothing allowing you to move, not even to breathe.  
  
‘ _Now go, my dear. I see that burning hatred inside of you. You want LOVE, correct? Then go kill. Kill until your black, tar-like heart is content._ ’  It giggled, jabbing the blade into your throat.  
  
You jerked awake in a sweat, taking in the area around you. The sudden shock of sunlight penetrating your eyes caused you to metaphorically flinch, and you closed them once more. You couldn’t help but bring your hands up to your face once more, trying desperately to decipher what had just happened. Who was that? You’d never seen the child before, but your body was almost overwhelmed with an undying sense of déja vu. Normally you would have used fabric of some sort to rub your eyes free of their clutter, but you had none at the moment.  
  
After rubbing away the gunk, you slowly pried them open, and stared at the cavern above you. It had been the place you had thrown yourself into, sunlight breaching the top, even though when you had jumped in it seemed pitch black. The sunlight was dampened by what looked like a clear film, causing it to not shine through properly.  
  
After examining what was above you for a bit longer than you would have liked, you finally pushed yourself off of the ground, finding that you were surrounded by gold and pale yellow buttercups. The petals were soft, and it was as if your body had not disturbed them at all from your tumble. That piqued your interest, but you summed it up to coincidence. You put yourself into a sitting position, and took in your surroundings with a more analytical sense.  
  
You had been in a narrow ravine of some sort, dust particles being amplified due to the sunlight baring down on them from above. The sides of the cavern had been slightly moist, vines and patches of overgrowth coating them in various places. The walls were jagged, almost as if they were naturally placed to where you couldn’t get out of here. It was a worthless attempt anyways, the exit being almost 700 meters above you. You’d have to have wings or some sort of teleportation to even think of doing so.  
  
The bed of flowers you lay on were still undisturbed, and were only lightly surrounded by some grass. The rest of the floor had been a cold grey, almost as if it was pavement for a sidewalk that was never introduced to heavy weather.  
  
You looked ahead to see that there was a door. It was framed by two royal purple pillars, and a plaque that framed a rune of some sort. It had a three triangles, a dot, and two wings, seemingly engraved by a person. It was so clean though, you couldn’t help but ponder who was behind its craftsmanship. The door was more of a frame for a pathway, but there was nothing to see behind it. It was completely dark, just like the hole you had jumped into. You were slightly worried that if you entered here that you would see the green clad adolescent once more, but shoved the thought to the back of your mind.  
  
You slowly pushed yourself off of your feet, and dusted off your pants. You wish before your drastic actions you had put on some proper clothes, since your current apparel was rather revealing of your not so pretty stature. Your stomach lightly hung over the beginning of your puffy pants, and you tried your best to suck in to hide it.  
  
You made your way over to the door, and faintly put a hand to the void behind it, feeling nothing but a light fuzziness. You decided it was safe, and made your way through. It was like blinking, suddenly not seeing the pitch black area behind the door and now seeing another room itself. This room was more of a slightly altered version than the previous, sans sunlight. The only thing you could really make out at this angle was a 30-35 centimeter flower. It reminded you of stray sunflowers in a bed of red roses, standing out because both their natural height and color. Its petals had matched the flowers around it, mimicking the ones from the previous area.  
  
You took a step forward, and the flower that towered over the others jerked back, and faced you. It had a face that looked painted on with ink. It had a near permanent grin on it, and its eyes crinkled with joy as it took in your form. It squinted, grin still clear in both its eyes and lips. It mumbled something under its breath, but you couldn’t catch it sadly.  
  
“Hi!” It squealed, leaves seeming to dance along with its disgustingly high pitched voice. You couldn’t help but cringe. “My name is Flowey the Flower! But you can call me Flowey.” It grinned, white tongue sticking out of the top of its mouth, accompanied by a wink of its right eye. It seemed as if its eye produced a little star along with it. “You must be soo confused,” it paused, “but, I can help out with that!” It grinned, tilting its head along with a sing song tone.

“You want some LOVE don’t you?” It giggled, but the only thing you could reply with was a minor frown. The way it said love reminded you of the child you saw before, such heavy exaggeration of the word. It puzzled you to no end. 

You stared at the flower in a mix of dismay, confusion, and discomfort. It was odd for a flower of all things to even think of talking to you, but you’d be lying if you said you didn’t think you were dead and now seeing things from the afterlife. Blankly staring at the flower, you unknowingly fiddled with your hands. “Down here…” It squirmed, “we gain love from little white… Friendliness pellets~!” It did the wink and tongue teasing smile once more, causing you to cringe internally due to how bad it was at lying. This thing reminded you of a child of some sort, simply playing games and telling fibs to get what it wants. 

You suddenly felt a violent wrenching sensation pull from your chest, causing you to stumble back in moderate dishevelment. The flower seemed to revel in your reaction, but you could barely focus on his actions, more concerned about the thing floating directly in front of you. It was an 8-bit heart, but the inside colors didn’t reflect its pixel border. It was a light cyan, with mixes of a magenta-like purple. In the depths of it, it had a light hint of green and yellow. It had a large crack diagonally across it. 

You, of course, had no idea what _any_ of this meant. All you had to go off of was the reaction of Flowey, him staring at the crack with a crestfallen look in his eyes. It quickly vanished although, causing him to don the same fake grin on his face once more. “That’s your SOUL. It’s the very culmination of your being! Down here, it’s our most important feature.” He giggled, and you stared at him for the umpteenth time in this moment. You couldn’t figure out his true personality, but your gut feeling seemed to agree on it being in no way good.

He summoned his ‘Friendliness Pellets’ and your world quickly flickered from color to grayscale, including the background flashing to an endless black. It reminded you of the place you were located before you had woken up in this unknown area. Before you had the chance to realize what Flowey truly had been doing, his pellets lurched at your soul at inhuman speeds, causing you to scream in agony. You desperately tried to grab your soul as a meaning of protection to no avail, and you couldn’t help but shake in downright fear. You felt _violated,_ like you had just walked back into the tender age of ten when your innocence had been ripped to shreds like a piece of loose leaf paper. You couldn’t stop the tears that poured down your face due to the sudden shock, but it confirmed your suspicions of the flower’s true nature. He was a lying _bitch_ , and you could not shake away the thought of him being _great_ friends with your mother.

His face had morphed into an ugly appearance, toothy grin and glare to boot, and he laughed at your current state of misery. You flinched at the all too familiar statements of belittlement, him referring to you as an idiot. But his next words sank into your core, causing your entire body to respond with a spasm. “In this world,” he paused, “it’s KILL or BE KILLED.” He was cackling once more, only to be interrupted by a massive fireball in his direction, causing him to fly out of your sight. The sigh of relief that escaped your lips must have been louder than you aimed for, since it bounced off the cave walls in an echo.

You wondered where that oh so convenient fireball had come from. Did Flowey conjure it to have your guard let down? No, that couldn’t be it. Plants and fire don’t mix, and he definitely could have finished you off then and there. Then… Who did it?

Your question was soon answered, mainly due to the tall figure weaving itself out of the shadows, causing your brows to fall in the opposite direction of eachother. What if this thing was here to finish you off, once and for all? You trembled at the thought of your death, even though the reason you were even in this place was due to a foolish suicide attempt. Your fear quickly evolved into a state of panic, so worried of what you had left behind in your drastic decision. Your first instinct was to check your phone for service, but that was quickly shut down by a voice breaking its way through your blood rushed ears.

 The figure had revealed itself, causing you to gape at its appearance. It was a very tall humanoid, one who resembled a goat in almost every way, other than having paws and being bipedal. Your jaw still hung limply as you took in the way it looked. It had a pair of robes on, purple draped across its front, revealing it did indeed have a pair of breasts, so you could easily conclude it had been female. At least, biologically. Her front patch had the same pattern you had seen above the door to the room you currently were in. You figured that the symbol had some hint of importance. She held a pair of crimson eyes, causing you to metaphorically grit your teeth in minor jealousy. Why had everyone here have red eyes? You wanted in on the party.

 It seemed she was speaking to you, but you were too distracted by her appearance. “Have you never seen a monster before, my child?” She laughed, eyes filled with mirth. “Well, no matter if you have or not, my named is Toriel. I’m the caretaker of the Ruins you currently reside in.” She stated with a small smile, eye lines crinkling to show no malicious intent unlike Flowey. She had a matronly aura to her, causing your walls of suspicion to burn to ashes. She reminded you of the mother you always dreamt of having. When you forgot to respond to introduction, her eyes seemed to flash with worry.

 “Are you alright, dear? You seem a bit shaken.” She said with an extended paw to your form. You stared at her with a mild glimpse of fear, but you finally gathered up the courage to take her offered hand. Once you were standing, you brushed off the minor clumps of dirt that had gathered on your clothing. “Y-yes, my apologies, ma’am. Just as you said, I’m a bit shaken, to say the least.” You said with a pained fake grin, but she seemed oblivious to the notion. She stared at you with concern and offered her paw once more. “I promise to you that I am no danger. Here, take my hand so I may guide you.” You almost immediately grabbed her paw, and interlocked your fingers between her padded digits.

 You felt mad at yourself for having the guarded front in your mind, but due to your recent events of being violently attacked by a weed, it didn’t confuse you. Toriel had seemed kind enough, so it didn’t feel too wrong to trust her with your well being. While she was guiding you to the next door, she had turned back to you and gave the warmest, most genuine smile you had ever laid eyes on. You desperately tried to suppress the flush that had swarmed your cheeks, but it proved to be pointless. You decided to use your free hand to hide it, drawing a light chuckle from Toriel at your response.

 You had entered a new room that was significantly larger than the previous ones. It had a double sided curved staircase, the middle having bushels of red leaves, reminding you of your ties at home during Autumn. Your light expression dimmed at the thought, and you couldn’t hide the sadness that plagued your features. You’d barely been down here, but you already desperately missed home. While you tried to make your vision focus, you noticed a slight glint in the bushes you’d just taken notice of. You rubbed your eyes to make sure you weren’t just seeing things, but you confirmed that it had not been a figment of your imagination. Toriel had let go of your hand some time ago, most likely to allow you to explore. You approached the bush with caution, and allowed your hand to ghost the light.

 ‘Meeting such a lovely monster after being attacked fills you with PERSEVERANCE. Save?

 You squinted at the newfound boxes of two prompts in front of you, so you cautiously pressed save. The text turned yellow, and gave you your current information.

 

JP - 483:17

Ruins

(Saved.)

 

You stared at the now absent textbox with discomfort, your hand still hovering over the place where the boxes had disappeared.

 Perseverance? More like confusion and a feeling of hopelessness.


	3. Noncon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oops.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> alright so im tired of writing this fucking chapter so im sorry for the ending being super rushed but it is what it is
> 
> you get to learn a bit more about jp, and i made a charahub for her so??? h  
> [heres the link ghghghg](https://charahub.com/character/1191401/Jacqueline-Poppy/)
> 
> [tumblr](http://madjicks.tumblr.com)

Letting out a sigh, you made your way up the staircase in a minor hurry, worrying about making Toriel impatient with you and greeting you with abandonment. As you made your way up, Toriel flashed that heartwarming smile once again, causing you to huff in mild embarrassment. She lead you into the next room, hand wrapped around your extended limb with the utmost of care. You entered another area, that almost now familiar feeling of vertigo rushing through your body. You couldn’t suppress a shudder, and it made you frown. Toriel once again made herself known to your dysphoric state by letting go of your hand all too suddenly. She walked over to an area that was littered with what looked to be five stone tablets.

She trailed over them with almost striking familiarity and followed her actions by a flick of a gold framed switch that laid on the wall. It shook the Ruins slightly, causing rubble to shake its way out of the cracked walls and ceiling. You could have sworn you had just heard something unlock in the distance, but summed it up to dumb luck. Your face scrunched up with curiosity, and you folded your arms. One hand prodded your chin in a thoughtful manner. “What was that all about?”

 “Simply a switch, my child. I solved a puzzle, that’s all.” She smiled, walking away on her own through the next door. You had to jog to even think of returning to the woman’s side, her long legs allowing her to make long strides with ease. She walked across a wooden bridge that hovered above a stream. It seemed to be more of decoration than for safety purposes, since the river was so shallow there was no chance of drowning and being pulled away. Was there possibly a monster who was affected poorly by water? It seemed rather unlikely due to the three bridged streams in the room, being too prominent to prove any need to shelter a monster that was dulled by water. You quickly kicked your over analyzation of _water_ , for pete’s sake, out of your mind, and tried to more focus on the task at hand.

 Toriel had stared at you with warm eyes, and you couldn’t help but wonder if she had asked something of you. “Oh, sorry. Did you say something? I zoned out…” You trailed off due to shame in yourself, hoping you didn’t offend Toriel in some way. You rubbed the back of your neck in mild distress, and she let out an amused sigh. “I said to please flick the switches so you get a hang of the puzzles you will encounter commonly down here.” You sort of scurried up to the wall that had a switch similar to the same one from before, but this had many crayon written gold arrows pointing at it. You jokingly scoffed at the hints, flipping your hair to dramatize your faux approval. Toriel let out a loud laugh, finding your antics humorous. You flipped the switch so drastically that you almost fell over, but you made sure to keep your balance; couldn’t afford to embarrass yourself anymore than you already had. You quickly turned, hand on your hip, and flashed the biggest smirk you could manage.

 “I’d be lying if I said I didn’t a _door_ this puzzle, but I’d _river_ be _switch_ ing to the next.” You panted, slightly out of breath due to your mini display. You weren’t in the best of shape, and you couldn’t even remember the last time you had put 3 puns into one sentence, especially on the spot like that. You mentally gave yourself a pat on the back, closing your eyes and breathing heavy.

Toriel stared at you with shock, and you couldn’t shake the feeling of your nerves flaring in anxiety. That quickly disappeared once you saw the negative emotion melt from her face, being replaced by positive ones instead. She let out one of the most beautiful laughs you had ever heard, and the heat that flared in your face was near unstoppable. Toriel quickly ran towards you, arms open for a big hug. You’d be a fool to dodge, so you quickly stumbled backwards in minor concern for your _own_ well being. This was also quickly drowned out by a chest slamming into your face, almost sending you tumbling across the floor. Her arms were wrapped around your head while you were trying to calm down the temperature practically radiating off of your face. It felt like charcoals, and could probably be fit for the small heater that’s placed underneath a kotatsu.

See, the thing is, Toriel is _tall_. She was easily 195cm, while you were a measly 168cm on your best day. So, of course, her bashful hug landed you with goat chest in your face. You couldn’t hide your burning features, since red was most commonly seen on the back of your neck and ears. Your face was rarely the culprit. You were very unsure what to do in your current situation, awkwardly fumbling with your hands to find a place to rest them. Your mind decided that her lower back had been ideal, so you went along with the idea. This whole situation had seemed to drag along for forever, until she finally broke away, her paws now clamped on your shoulders. Her eyes turned from warm to mischievous, and you couldn’t identify if the bead of sweat that trailed down your temple was from fear or heat.

 “Knock knock.”

 “Who’s, uh, there?” You responded shakily, still in mild shell shock from the previous situation.

 “Juno.”

 “Juno who?” Ah, who cares? You shouldn’t be thinking so bad about a hug, even if you were almost suffocated by that entire segment.

 “ _Juno_ any more awesome puns?” She grinned so wide that you let out a snort, accompanied by a big smile. Oh god, this girl was a _riot_. Tears dared to bridge your eyes, your laughter being joined by Toriel’s own. You both were laughing so much that you almost forgot your current situation, causing you personally to violently jerk back to it.

 You already missed the laughter.

After your session of horrible jokes with Tori, you two had made your way throughout the Ruins with relative ease. This place felt rather claustrophobic though, which was really your only true complaint. But, it also didn’t feel too right that there were barely any monsters that hopped around. It felt as if there should be more than just one or two Froggits with the occasional Whimsun. The entire area felt abnormally barron, and the déjà vu that plagued you was near overwhelming at this point. The feeling also brought a wave of nausea, and you were so caught up in your thoughts that you didn’t even realize that Toriel was attempting to speak to you. This seemed to happen more than you’d like.

Not long ago, she had brought you into her home, showing you where you would sleep, and then sharing pie along with golden flower tea. You couldn’t help the swarm of compliments that flew from your mouth at the taste, the gentle tingle of magic that traced your tongue after the ingestion just made it all the better. Your body felt warm and the nausea had dissipated, which you couldn’t thank her for enough. She quickly reassured you it was quite alright, and she was happy to help you. Apparently, Toriel originally made the brew for her husband’s love of the flowers, but ever since their divorce, she kept it for passersby whose souls’ had been close to shattering. You were confused as to why you had been drinking this, but she quickly explained to you that your soul was rather cracked, and how low your HP, or _hope_ , truly was.

It scared you. Sure, you weren’t surprised to learn that your soul was broken, but you hoped at least down here you could be accepted for who you were. Apparently, you were an anomaly, just like you were to humans with your genetic deformities. You felt disgusted with yourself, no matter how much Toriel tried to push the agenda of it being perfectly normal. You knew she was lying to you to try and keep you happy, you could detect liars with ease from years of constant abuse and distrust. You were touched by her words, but it didn’t help the negative connotations from her previous ones. You were _broken_ , and your hope had been so abysmal that you were _weak_. You hated the word. Weak, such a weak word itself, having such short structure, but still holding so much power within something so small. You cursed yourself for being born a failure, but you grit your teeth and sipped your tea to keep yourself in a much calmer state than what you truly wanted to invoke.

Once you finished your pie with mild satisfaction, you excused yourself to the bathroom, which had been just to the right of the room you had been staying in for the time being. You thanked Toriel for her kind instructions as guarded as you could, and you quickly sped out of the room. You entered the bathroom with disappointment, slightly wishing you had been back home in your own. The bathroom had always been an escape to you in general, you hiding in there when your social situation overwhelmed you to uncontrollable amounts. It was a good excuse, since all humans needed to use them, so you could stay in there to get better control of your mental state.

It was also a place where a lot of self mutilation of all kinds occurred, whether it be picking your skin to scabbing shreds, or slicing your thighs wide open with the pull of a knife or razor blade. You were a true masochist at heart, never wanting to see others in pain, but always inflicting it on yourself. Sometimes you even provoked other people just so they would hurt you. You did it a lot when you realized how easy it was. You got some sick thrill out of it, and your fascination with gore of all kinds really didn’t help.

The thing is, you never hurt anyone else like you did to yourself. Never scratched anyone or broke the skin in any way. Sure, you may have slapped or punched a few people, but nothing to cause the scarring you had caused by yourself, _to yourself_. People always called you psycho and every other slur in the book, but your apathy couldn’t be anymore common. You sat down in the bathtub, and took off your bra, slightly glaring at it. You hated wearing these, but it wasn’t like society accepted you for who you truly wanted to be. The only grace you received was being referred to as JP as opposed to your dead name, which made you shudder in a non pleasant way whenever you heard it. You had accepted your fate when your boyfriend had asked you out two years ago, knowing you could never properly be comfortable with your skin and still have him in your life.

And, per usual, you were a coward.

You really couldn’t stand up for yourself, and you were a lot weaker than people thought of you as. No, you’re not a damsel in distress character, but more of a… spiky doormat? Like someone who’s easily stepped on but it’s gonna hurt like hell when you do it. Your preferred method for revenge was uncommon, since you would think on it for a while before enacting it. You held grudges horribly, even for the people who did horrible things to you. You just were too forgiving. It was one of your many downfalls.

You yawned as you mindlessly washed your bra in the bathtub, not even caring about your pants getting soaked by the warm water. It felt nice, so you could care less about faraway consequences. You’d always been like that, caring more about the short term than long. As you were washing the cloth, you realized that you wouldn’t have your meds down here with you. No wonder you kept zoning out, you didn’t have your Ritalin to keep you in focus. You felt bad for it, but there was little to no stopping your mental illness without your meds. Now realizing you weren’t even washing your article of clothing, you threw it behind you in the tub and sat there. You did this sometimes, just usually you don’t wear anything. The bathroom was like your haven, perfect for escape.

You watched as the tub filled up slowly, the warm water feeling nice on your tense muscles. You wondered if Toriel would let you take a bath, but you were unsure. You decided to gamble a bit, and snickered to yourself. “Mom!” You called, and you giggled as you heard heavy footsteps trample across the hardwood flooring of her home. She greeted you with a knock on the door. “Yes! What is it, my child?” She seemed to respond cheerily, and you couldn’t help the lazy smile on your face from her perkiness. “Do you mind if I take a bath? I could use a towel.” You murmured, yawning at the end of your sentence. “Of course! I’ll go fetch you one.” You mumbled a thanks in return, and sank your pudgy cheeks into your now wet hands. It was cold due to the rest of your body not being engulfed by the liquid, but you didn’t care much. A few minutes later, Toriel had returned with a simple white and pink checkered towel, and it seemed to spark with magic. “I gave it a temporary enchantment to keep it warm, enjoy, my dear.” She almost was out of the room before she turned around once more. “Would you like me to wash your clothes?”

“Oh, yeah, that’d be helpful.” You chuckled, you felt somewhat just, _at peace_ , right now, like the world was yours and you could just relax. She gave you another smile, and you stripped off your clothes to hand to her in a soggy, yet neat as possible, pile. She wished you luck as she left the bathroom, and you sank into the now half full tub. This tub was amazing, it was triple the size you were normally used to, and you guessed because of Toriel’s overall stature. Thank god for monsters being awesome.

Your mind drifted off at one point, almost like daydreaming, but more like fantasizing about what could happen. You dozed in the tub, not having a care in the world about your current situation. Sure, you were a homeless human who hopped into the world of monsters with a death wish, but man, this place was better than above. Everything was so homey and welcoming, you didn’t feel discriminated against in any way, even though monsters attacked you every so often. But, that didn’t bother you, since they did no real damage and always apologized afterwards. Down here was just, a sigh of relief. Fresh air. Anything that was just good described this place well. The only truly negative encounter you had that didn’t correlate with your awkwardness was Flowey, and he was taken care of from your new self proclaimed goat mom.

You decided that was enough soaking for now, and you stepped out of the tub, toes pruney from the amount of time you spent in water. You laughed mentally as you remembered that was something the human body did to gain traction on wet surfaces. You always knew these weird fun facts, and they were always great conversation starters. Once you left the bathtub, you grabbed the towel and near squealed from how _amazing_ it felt. It was the softest thing you’d ever felt, and you have felt quite a few soft things. They were your favorite, whether it be hair or velvet. Another fun fact, authentic silk isn’t as soft as manufacturers make it out to be, it’s actually rather rough.

You wrapped the towel over your head and dried off your hair as best as possible. You didn’t feel nervous around Toriel since one, she was a monster, you doubted she would get offended by your nudity. Two, you both were chicks by nature, you knew what boobs looked like. You made your way over to your room next door, and knocked to make sure no one had been in there. Being greeted with silence, you pleasantly assumed that it was empty and you could enter it. You noticed Toriel had placed a plate of butterscotch cinnamon pie on the desk near a picture frame in the corner of the room. Your clothes were on the bed, but you couldn’t shake the feeling of this being an actual _child’s_ room. Like, not a preteen, an actual child. It gave you a bad vibe in general, since most of the stuff seemed to have a thin layer of dirt coating it.

You normally would have expected dust, but with how monsters pass down here… Yeah, _you_ put two and two together. You whistled your anxiety away, and cracked your knuckles in mild contentment. You removed the towel from your head, and slung it over the chair that was at the desk with the pie. You noticed there had been a white sweater along your clothes. Maybe Toriel _wasn’t_ as comfortable with your body as you thought, so you quickly shrugged it on with mild disappointment. You loved just walking around in just a bra, but you would humor her just for this occasion. You put your pants back on, along with your socks and black slip ons she had supplied for you. Only now had you realized you’d made it all this way barefoot. You laughed nervously at how unprepared you truly were, kind of wishing you had packed some things before this whole ordeal. You stuck out your tongue as you fiddled with the drawstrings of your pants, eyes squinted with concentration. A knock on your door startled you, sending you backwards on your bed. The door quickly opened to reveal none other than Toriel, and the smile that appeared on your face was near blinding.

“‘Sup, Tori. Thanks for the clothing.” You said, having a more friendly vibe than the anxiety ridden attitude you had earlier, but not trying to show off that Toriel’s sudden appearance had rattled you. Toriel seemed to enjoy it, but didn’t make any note of your recent predicament. “Nothing much. Did you enjoy your bath?” She inquired from the door, head peeking through with shiny eyes. “Mhm,” you said absentmindedly, fiddling with how high up your socks were on your legs and making sure they matched each other. “Well, don’t be up too late. It will be nightfall soon, so it’s very important for you to get your rest. Good night.” She bid you adieu, and the unnoticeable heat to your face was, like stated, _unnoticeable._ Thank god for that! You were tired of what this poor woman was doing to your nerves, constantly making you feel safe and happy feely. You sat down at the desk, and pushed the pie off to the side. It was great, but you weren’t too hungry at the moment. You noticed there was a single fountain pen and a jar of ink, and a small notebook. You were elated, having a way to jot down your findings in case your phone died. You flipped the book open and went to writing.

Back to your current situation, Toriel was yelling at you as you hightailed it to the end of the Ruins, damn near high stepping at 270bpm. All you knew is that holy shit! You pissed her off, and now she was screaming expletives and sending fire on your tail. Your lungs were burning almost as much as her hands, asthma kicking your ass. You didn’t know what made you think this was a good idea, but now that you made it a reality, it no longer was one. You were just exploring and then you heard fast foot steps and now look at you! You’re in this horrible situation of being chased by a goat monster gone nuts! Your eyes widened in fear as you realized your sprint was coming to a close, two very large doors blocking your way. You quickly looked everywhere but behind you, and found no way to escape. You decided to whip around, only to find Toriel almost centimeters away from your face. You flinched as you slowly backed up, eventually being pressed against the door. You put your hands up in defense, every single alarm bell going off in your mind. “I figured since you are older you would understand the consequences. It seems I  am wrong.” Man, you didn’t like this at all! Toriel turned from being a total sweetheart to being a uh, stone cold b- woman. She scared the living daylights out of you, and you wished you would just melt into the doors.

“C-C’mon, Tori! This is just a huge misunderstanding!” You said frantically, waving your hands in front of you to exaggerate it. She seemed to ignore your pleas, and you felt that familiar tug in your chest of a fight initiating. You stood far from her now, her back to the doors you were once at. Sweat was pouring down your face, once more confused as to if it was from heat or fear. Probably an odd mix of both.

You plead to no avail, constantly slamming your hands on the mercy button. You didn’t want to hurt anyone, especially somewhat as sweet as Toriel. “Come on, Toriel…” You begged, holding your arms out in a hug. Her attacks swerved to a halt, and she felt to her knees, so you rushed forward to hold her gently. She sobbed into your arms, and you rubbed her back with the utmost care. You whispered condolences to try and soothe her, and the damp look in your own eyes was near transparent. She kept crying, and it reminded you of this morning.

The scene was over relatively quickly, and against your will, you were shoved out of the doors to your new home, causing you to frantically whip around to find the doors shut and locked.

Oh, for fuck’s sake.


	4. Winter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh boy! Your favorite, skeletons.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay so this chapter is a little bit longer than previous ones, which i didnt intend it to be, but it lays out some of the main plot points for this story. im sorry for my update being a bit late, but im trying! school is kicking my ass and im having mild writers block
> 
> hhh
> 
> [tumblr](http://madjicks.tumblr.com)

This was definitely a huge mistake!

See, the thing is, the Ruins were warm and welcoming. They had an overall homey feeling to them, littered with sweet monsters and simple puzzles. Spider bake sales, and pastries galore due to Toriel’s talent for baking. But, this place? Oh no, it was horribly different.

This place had introduced itself with a bone through your chest, presumably aimed for your already broken soul. Fortunately, the crack had been so wide that it slipped right through, only causing you physical damage. All you had now was a speechless look on your face, staring at the blood splattered on the thin, yet deadly projectile. Your fascination with blood had quelled your nerves in the most miniscule of ways, but you suddenly recollected what had happened. Being forcefully shoved out of your home was something that dug up memories of your abusive childhood, and you winced as tears gathered in your eyes. Were you never allowed a break in this world? You seemed to always have abuse in some way or another. Breaking out of your trance of unwelcome nostalgia, you took in your surroundings. Snow littered every surface, it piling up to your ankles with a soft instinct. There were tall oak trees that stood to the sides of you, but they were barren. You figured it was winter, or something akin to the season, in this area. It reminded you of home and it’s wintery season, constantly being barricaded by snow during December. Your analyzations were stunted by the crunching sounds of foot on snow, and you only hoped for whatever had appeared to finish off your dull and damaged soul.

“Welp, guess there’s _snow_ way out of this, huh?” You laughed, your biggest coping mechanism once again ending with a morbid pun. Your shallow laughter was interjected by blood filling your lungs, causing you to cough up the thick substance violently. How curious, such a small object puncturing a relatively hidden part of your body caused this much damage. Sure, you were relatively used to coughing up a fleck of blood or two biweekly, but this much was nearly absent from your entire life. It pooled down your dry lips freely, dribbling onto your white sweater that Toriel had graciously gave you. You haven’t a care in the world, however. All you knew was that you were here, dying, in a place of snow. It was odd seeing the pink and red colors litter the frozen droplets, but you found it somehow pretty. You always found such morbid things pretty, which explained your odd fascination with gore. You just loved the inside of humanity, but that didn’t mean you wanted to hurt anyone to fulfill your odd desires.

You were fading out of conscious since your body was in a state of shock, and you were ripped back by an extremely hard smack to the cheek. You hissed in pain, the cold only making the pain amplified. “Hey, what the he-“ Your words were paused by the same hand placing its finger to your lips, which you learned from a young age meant to shut your mouth. You begrudgingly obeyed the action, and blankly stared off into the distance. You felt the bone in your ribcage quickly dissolve, but the blood poured out of the puncture wound it had produced. "ahh, shit…” The figure said, your eyes too blurry to really function properly and identify who was currently trying to either fondle you, or heal you. You optimistically chose the latter, monsters down here seemed too kind to do anything like that. You slumped further into the snow, only to be pushed back up. You groaned in annoyance, only wanting to go to sleep. Your body felt drained of any energy you had once had, and you hadn’t slept in what felt like forever.

“you humans sure do make a lot of noise.” The voice grumbled, and you couldn’t help but take a liking to the baritone. You’d always liked deeper voices, that explained one of the many affections you had towards your lover. Though, down here… You doubted you’d ever see him again, which caused a frown to spread across your face. You hadn’t even noticed the tears that slipped down your face, thankfully not freezing in the below zero temperatures. They slipped off of your blue cheeks, and felt onto the monster’s, or so you presumed, hands, causing them to jerk up to examine what the source was. “oh no, why’re you crying? did i hurt you too much? i’m not that good at healing magic…” The voice mumbled, seeming ashamed in himself. You tried desperately to reassure him that it was fine, but you were too weak to even properly move at the moment. You let out a gargle of noises in response, voice drowned out by the pocket of blood gathered in the back of your throat. “i’m no human, but there’s no way that’s good…” The monster bellowed, rubbing your turtleneck across your chin. You were too out of it to really care. “okay, screw this. c’mon, big guy.” You mentally twinkled at being referred to as a guy, but it was clouded by blood loss, your mind feeling rather foggy. You were thrown over this monster's shoulder, and your face was flooded with the soft feeling of fur. Maybe if you weren’t bleeding out, you would have giggled in happiness, but all you could do was look at the ground blankly while drops of blood slipped out of your mouth.

The surroundings around you that melted out of existence gave you mild shock, but not enough to elicit a physical response. You felt a tug, and your soul was ripped out of your body. The endless black that was around you and this unknown monster felt almost familiar, except this time the monster had what looked to be a screen. Your vision was too blurry to make out the details, though. Your soul quickly retreated back into your body, and you were teleported to the inside of a house…? You weren’t exactly sure, but what you were sure of, was your stomach contents pouring out of your mouth. You felt bad for ruining this spot on the floor, but at the moment, you had little to no control over your body. You were oblivious to your long hair being lifted behind your head and a hand rubbing circles of comfort onto your back. All you could process right now was the bile that flooded your taste buds, making you grimace in disgust. “here, i’ll go buy some sea tea. gimme a sec.” He murmured, your hair now falling to the sides of your head. 

You were sat with your legs folded behind your body, giving you the resemblance of a froggit. You blankly stared at the pile of vomit in front of you, and quickly tried to pinch your nose to reduce the revolting smell that seemed to fill the entire room. You felt the dry surge of magic next to your body, only to be greeted by the monster’s presence, the area around him glitching back to normal. He forced a small can with a straw into your hands, and you took it submissively. You placed your mouth on the straw, and took a small sip, and instantly felt the effects of the drink in your bloodstream. Your burning throat had a nice cool feeling to it now, almost like you’d just chewed some mint gum. You smiled softly, grateful for this simple remedy. The hole in your chest had slowly been stitching itself back together, but sadly the fabric stayed ripped.

You had quickly finished off the tea with a gracious sigh, placing the can next to your right leg. You rubbed your eyes free of tears, and opened them lazily. They were greeted by a… Skeleton? Who waved at you shyly, his legs crossed in front of his body. You looked at the splotches of blood in the white fur of his coat, and felt minor remorse. _What just happened?_ Your mind chirped, and you couldn’t help but agree with the question. You decided to file it off on your list of endless queries and directed your attention towards the skeleton in front of you. You cleared your throat, and croaked out a greeting. “hey there, you alright, buddy?” You shrugged reluctantly in response, not really feeling anything at the moment. The sea tea had done wonders for your injury, but you were still a little mentally shaken.

“I guess,” you mumbled, fiddling with the drawstrings of your overly baggy sweatpants. You were unsure how to really approach the situation. The first thing you had even been greeted with when you entered this area was murderous intent, only to be sitting in front of the monster who went through with the action. You purse your lips in minor discontent, never comfortable with being unsure of what to decide on. Your head was racing with analyzations, questions, ideas, and impulsive actions, all going a mile a minute. It was unsettling to say the least, and you were almost desperate for it to stop. Your attention was grabbed by this skeleton in front of you though, not all too sure as to what your impression of him truly was.

It was a mix of anger, fear, and hopelessness; emotions you were all too familiar with. Sure, he tried to fix his mistake, but it still didn’t relieve the gravity of the situation in the least. The only thing you could really feel grateful for was that you weren’t throwing up your stomach contents all over the carpet you currently sat on. It was minor relief, but not enough to quell the mental stress over your current predicament. Were you to trust this new character, or run away and decide to travel throughout the Underground? You were lost, something you never liked to feel for long. Being shoved out of the Ruins was the last thing in your mind, too concentrated on the present to dwell on what had happened, even if it was relatively recent. A boney snap dragged you out of the fog that settled over your mind and eyes, and your head jerked up to meet eyes with the same monster you were pondering laying your trust in.

“uh,” he mumbled, probably unsure as to what to say to you now that he had your unwavering attention. That was quite a feat, especially since your mind was reeling from not having your daily medicine in your body. Missing your Ritalin meant zero attention span, so for someone to grab it, it meant much. Of course, he didn’t know that. All he knew was that you were a human. A human he’d never met in previous timelines, someone that puzzled this equally puzzled skeleton to bits. He was worried about how to approach this whole mess, and all he could really decide to do was his average first greeting, hoping to make your tense shoulders relax, even in the slightest of ways.

“care for an introduction?” He asked, reaching out one of his mittened hands to you, and you couldn’t help but let out an exasperated chortle. It was more of a ‘ _really?_ ’ response, a silent one, but you couldn’t help but be relieved to finally discuss something _other_ than this tense situation with the monster. You shrugged once more, mentally berating yourself for inattentive repetitivity. Unease had pooled inside of your gut, but you pressed to ignore it and simply return his outstretched gesture. You reached out your hand, and took his in your own.

The flatulent sound that filled the room was deafening.

Your face tinted red, and you slapped your free hand over your lips. No, it wasn’t embarrassment, it was surprised, yet welcomed shock. You of all people would have never expected something so… Sudden, and for this skeleton to greet you with a whoopie cushion. Well, it was a pleasant surprise. You tried to hide your cackles behind your hand, but didn’t seem to accomplish what you were aiming for. You let out pained breaths of laughter, throwing your head back in downright amusement. “heh, whoopie cushion in the hand trick. it’s _always_ funny.” The monster had only what you could describe as a shit eating grin on his face, lights in his eyes seeming to expand. The bone underneath the creases of his eyes crinkled at your reaction, and you couldn’t believe that _this_ is what lied beneath the cold personality of the person who tried to end your life.

“the name’s sans. sans the skeleton.” He grinned, breaking the handshake you two had. You tried to calm yourself down from your laughing fit, and with little success, you let out quickened breaths, trying to theoretically catch them. You placed your hand on your knee to balance yourself, and let out a happy sigh. “I’m JP. Nice to meet ya.” You said with a genuinely smile on your face, still mentally giggling at the action this short little skelly just made. He let out a deep chuckle of his own, and folded his hands in his lap. “nice to meet you, too, buddy. sorry for the cruddy first impression.” You shrugged in response, trying to suppress your negative emotions _towards_ said first impression.

 “So uh… Where are we?”

“oh, we’re in my house. i figured teleporting you here was a bit more convenient than lettin’ ya bleed out in the snow.” He laughed, somewhat of a deeper meaning behind those words then he initially let on. He was mysterious, for sure, and you were still relatively queasy about letting your trust lay in his hands. Toriel had informed you previously that monsters were made of love and magic, and not the bad type of LOVE. The good kind, you were happy to hear. The silence that filled the room was rather… Awkward, and you were unsure how to really break it. You didn’t know much about Sans, and you weren’t too sure you wanted to. He seemed to have similar personalities with you, but at least you didn’t attack people at first sight.

Well, not usually anyways.

You tried to push yourself off of the carpet, but were quickly refrained from doing so by a hand on yours, and you met eyes with him once again. “What is it?” You asked, staring at him in mild confusion. He removed his hand, and shook his head. “nothin’, sorry.” He murmured, rubbing his free hand on the back of his vertebrae.

You stared at him quizzically, wondering what exactly he was planning to say in that situation. You broke your gaze to look out one of the tinted windows, outside slightly dimmed by a coating of black film. You squinted to better focus your vision, and were shocked to see more snow. Outside was beautiful, and you hopped up to the couch and placed your hands on the window, reviving memories of your childhood. Winter had always been one of your favorite seasons, and seeing all the snow around this area was a great reminder of home. The town felt soft, home-y, sort of like the Ruins, but more natural and less claustrophobic. Your eyes were sparkling with happiness, your hands not even registering the freezing feeling traveling through them due to being stuck to a frigid surface.

You hadn’t even noticed the slight bits of tears that had gathered at the corners of your eyes, still smiling in awe at the sight before you. When they slipped down your cheeks, you were shocked out of your daze, and quickly rubbed them away with the heels of your hands. Sans didn’t need to see you cry over such a silly thing, and it would be hard to explain anyways. Too bad that he’d already seen, but you were oblivious to the action. You were too absorbed in your memories, reliving some happy childhood recollections, something that was rare in your broken mind.

What you didn’t see, Sans saw. He saw your broken soul glow with something akin to happiness, and he stared at it with newfound curiosity. He had only ever seen one human soul, that one being Frisk’s bright red, determined one. But _yours_ , yours was broken and a mix of various colors. He inferred that you were at least older than the child in previous times, and that may tie to why your soul looked so drastically different. He was worried about the shape it was in though, the edges in the middle jagged and almost worn.

He looked back to the window with a grimace. He still wasn’t sure about you, and he could feel that that emotion was mutual.

You broke away from the window, rubbing your hands together and blowing warm air into them to reheat the borderline icicles. “Well, uh, I guess I should be going? You probably don’t want me here any longer,” you said, minorly distracted by what awaited you outside. You could go shopping, assuming this place had a store and what not. You hoped beyond high waters that it did, but with the Ruins being as barren as you’d seen, you had very low faith in this place being any better. “you can stay here, if ya want. ain’t hurtin’ anyone, but you might get a loud awakening if you crash on our couch.” Our? You thought that Sans’ lived solitary, not even considering the thought of two or more people in this household. Was it another skeleton? You were now curious about this short skeleton’s living situation, and stared at him with an acute look on your face. He seemed to squirm under your gaze, and you snorted in amusement.

You shoved your hands in your waistband, something you seemed to do in situations that required heavy thinking on your part. And, let’s be honest, thinking was not something your lazy ass enjoyed doing. You preferred having things handed to you to put together like a simple puzzle, not something where you had to find your own resources. You were a nonchalant person, and that probably explained why your impulse control was rather low on the charts. You scrunched up your face, and slumped your shoulders, letting that previously unrealized tension slip out of them. You were mildly surprised by the sigh that Sans’ let out, and you eyed him with a questioning glance. “I mean,” you paused, nibbling on the inside of your cheek. “If you’re offering, you won’t see me deny it.” You said with faux confidence, trying desperately to not let on how frightened you truly were.

You were still on edge about this situation as a whole. A lot of things had happened in the past hour, and you doubt it even had been that long. It was most likely a generous timeframe on your part, and it wasn’t like there was a sun or moon to aid you in your time struggles. You stared at the skeleton with apprehension, not feeling any surge of confidence in the least. I mean, what if he wanted to kill you in your sleep, or something? You never knew, you never thought you’d meet a monster down here who saw you and immediately thought of homicide. Sure, Flowey existed, but from all the monsters in the Ruins greeting you with relative kindness made you believe it had been a one time scenario.

You decided to sit down to rest your tired legs, flopping down onto the springy couch. You cringed at the ugly sound the couch made under your weight, put forced a very pained smile on your face. “maybe the couch isn’t the best idea.” Sans chuckled, slipping his hands into his pockets. You wish you could leave, but there was no way you were going back out into the cold with a torn sweater and barely anything else. Your shoes and socks were still soaked from earlier, and you wriggled your toes inside of them to disgustingly enjoy that awful feeling. You had an odd personality and favored weird things for sure, but no one ever seemed to notice. Your black ballet flats were sure to live through a little water, it wouldn’t be the first time your limbs had been soaked to the bone.

Heheh, unintentional pun.

“It’s fine, I’ve had worse.” You lazily smiled, sinking further into the damaged couch. It was a bland green color, various stains and crumbs littered across it. It reminded you of your old couch when you still lived with your parents, constantly being coated in food remains because of your four year old brother at the time. He was 9 now, and your eyes softened at the thought of him. Your hands opened and closed without your notice, and it was almost as if you weren’t underground, you weren’t next to a monster who tried to kill you, and you definitely weren’t falling asleep in someone who you barely knew’s house. You were just so damn tired, your body finally giving into your overwhelming fatigue from today.

Your eyes had slipped shut without you even realizing it, and Sans didn’t take notice until you had already fallen asleep. You were in a sitting position, not even laying down properly. Sans’ squinted at you, still in confusion about how humans worked, and how older one’s sleeping habits were so oddly different than the children he’d always known.

You were a peaceful sleeper, at least he hoped. It seemed all the tense feelings in your body had slipped away, no trying to suck in the rolls of fat on your body, or holding yourself in such a way that felt unnecessarily guarded. He was curious about you, since you were new in this cluster of timelines Sans had lived through. You hadn’t a bit of dust on your clothing, and no LOVE to your Soul. He was glad for it, to say the least, and he was rather confused and wondered if you had the power to reset as well. He’d be lying if he said he hoped you didn’t, but he didn’t want you to die, either. Your soul was clearly weak, like his own, but it wasn’t like he could see any of your stats to determine if you were as fragile. All he could see was your Level of Violence and Experience, the rest being unknown to any monster.

He was unsure how to really approach any of this, staring at you a bit a longer. He wanted to burn your appearance into his own mind. How your hands were scarred in various places and the light freckles that dusted the tops of them. How your nails were ripped off and weren’t elongated in any way. How your face had the same freckles that were on your hands, and how your eyelashes curled up in the slightest of ways. Your hair was slightly greasy and knotted, and the sweater you wore was rather frayed. It was a bit small on you, the bottom of your stomach peaking out from the end of the sweater. He figured it wasn’t your own, and probably summed it up to being from Toriel.

He was also glad to know that Toriel had been safe. He had seen her dust on Frisk’s hands too many times to really understand grief anymore. Toriel had been a good friend of his, someone he could share is humor with and just feel comfortable. She reminded him of his father before he had that accident, constantly cracking jokes, some more vulgar than others, while him and Sans worked on their next project to break the barrier. He missed those times, he missed having no humans constantly resetting the time he existed in and ruining his mind. Sure, he was depressed before the human even came due to his father suddenly disappearing and no one remembering him, but after Frisk, he simply became cold.

The first time he met the child, they had been kind. They always carried a stick around with them, and a dirty bandage was on their cheek 90% of the time. They had a sort of charm to them that every monster loved, and all they wished for was love and friendship. He had learned about this child’s past, since Frisk had considered Sans’ a close friend while they were on the surface during those far and few moments. He remembered his eyes widening at how beautiful sunlight truly was, and to see non-barren and non-magic fueled vegetation was something to relish in his lifetime.

And then he watched as the timeline flickered to nothing, and he was back in Snowdin being awakened by his brother.

The second timeline was a distant memory, his mind even struggling to really latch onto what had truly happened. All he remembered was very heavy déjà vu, and constantly being plagued with a drowning feeling of anxiety whenever he saw that child leave the Ruin doors.

The first time he saw his brother die was long ago. At first he was wracked with grief, so disgusted with himself for not stepping in during their fight. He was oblivious to the way the kid had shuffled around and ignored his brother’s puzzles, too really distracted by what had happened. And when he had seen his brother’s scarf in the snow, it was a horrible reality he wished he had never had to face. 

It happened so many times that Sans’ journal entries were no longer in chronological order. It used to be labeled with roman numerals, but now it was just simple numbers followed by a timeline label. He was too tired to even focus on them, not even writing an entry every time they reset anymore.

But this time. This time wasn’t routine like so many times before. You were much earlier than Frisk had ever been, and you were a lot more different.

Sure, Sans had felt remorse for shooting a lethal bone through your chest. Sure, he felt bad for having you pass out on his couch. But, what else was he supposed to do? None of this was familiar to him. He had only ever had Frisk fall down here and ruin his life, so what was he to expect of you? You didn’t seem to have any hostile intent, but what would he know? Neither did Frisk in the first timeline, for all he knows, you could be the same.

The only thing he could _truly_ see as something else was that your Soul was nowhere near as strong as Frisk’s had been. And for that, he felt guiltily grateful.


	5. Epistaxis

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Injuries to the head and face suck.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for this super late chapter!! ive run into sort of a wall in this story and well you know.  
> i went back and fixed some previous spacing errors in previous chapters and what not too! this chapter is a bit shorter than the others since ive, like i said, ran into slight writers block.
> 
> hope u enjoy!! <3
> 
> [tumblr](http://madjicks.tumblr.com)

When you were awakened with a boisterous voice, you just now realized how much your head truly _throbbed_. It was hard to even move to press your cold hands over your ears, and you were shocked who could be screaming that loud at this hour. You shut your eyes even tighter, somehow thinking that was the way to block out the noise other than the accompaniment of your hands. You finally gave up after a couple moments, although, and threw yourself off the couch. To your dismay, your head was met with the front corner of the table, making you hiss in pain as you flopped to the vomit stained carpet.

As you were clutching the back of your head, you grit your teeth. God dammit, what else was gonna make your head hurt? A bullet? God, that’d be a blessing right now, wouldn’t it. You were now curled up on the floor in pain, hands cradled over the side of your head that hit the corner of the table. Your ears were ringing, and you felt the vibrations of heavy footsteps that trampled along the floor in your direction. “SANS!” They called, causing you to wince in response. They were so loud. “WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME YOU HAD A FRIEND OVER?” You inferred that this was the person Sans had been referring to the previous night, and you hoped beyond belief that this presumed monster didn’t realize you were human. And, if they did, well, let’s just hope they didn’t.

A hand—gloved, you presumed—ghosted the top of your head, causing you to grit your teeth in pain. “OH NO! ARE YOU HURT?” The voice did seemed concern for your well being, which you hoped was genuine. You dared to look up and meet this monster’s eyes, and realized he was yet another skeleton. He looked a bit more like a human one, not having the round skeleton like Sans. He wasn’t as realistic as a human skeleton, of course, since his body functioned like a living being, as opposed to being held together with strings and metal bars. His sockets weren’t as large and round like Sans, either. They were vertically stretched, and were very subtly tinted brown. You wouldn’t notice unless you had a sharp eye, which you did. He looked down at you with what you could only guess was curiosity.

The only thing you truly could focus on right now, other than the agony in your temples, was the skeleton’s outfit. He wore some sort of breastplate, matched with shoulderplates that were rimmed with gold. You were impressed by the handiwork of the mini suit of armor. He had a colored cloak rung around his neck, the ends of it visible behind the end of his vertebrae. More like where the sacroiliac joints and lower vertebrae met. It had rips and holes littered throughout it, the edges frayed from clear use. His breastplate had a certain logo on it, reminding you of the marks Starmen had on their chest. The plate ended where one usually would, the bottoms of his ribs peaking out. He wore a pair of denim boyshorts, a yellow belt keeping them in place at the top of his pelvis.

His bones were covered in mahogany polyester, covering up the parts of his skeleton that were supposed to be bare. He topped the outfit off with a red pair of gold cuffed boots and gloves, the boots being laced up and donning a three inch heel. His entire outfit howled both a great blacksmith and taylor, and it reminded you of your parents and their creative sides. More your mother’s, than anything.

You only now realized that you’d been staring, and you pushed yourself off the ground rather flushed. “Yeah! Sorry, I just woke up.” You dusted off your sweater, trying to make yourself as presentable as possible to this overly tall monster. It seemed the aches from your head had vanished with this newfound distraction, and you’d be lying if you said you weren’t thankful. You desperately tried to tame the heat that had flooded your face. “IT IS QUITE ALRIGHT!” He grinned, causing you to relax as much as possible at the moment. Even with his threatening figure, it seemed his attitude was quite friendly, and for that you were thankful.

He offered his hand to you, and you took it for support in lifting yourself off the ground. “WELL, IT IS NICE TO MEET YOU! I’M SORRY THAT MY BROTHER’S BOONDOGGLING BORED YOU TO SLEEP.” He laughed, and you couldn’t help but smile at his presumption. “BUT, I, THE _GREAT_ PAPYRUS, SHALL ENTERTAIN YOU MUCH MORE THAN HE EVER COULD!” He seemed to attempt rolling his Rs, but failed miserably. You appreciated the effort, but couldn’t help the comparison to Skeletor.

“Well, it’s nice to meet you, Papyrus. My name’s JP!” You cleared the morning grogginess from your throat, and continued your conversation. “And your brother wasn’t boring in the least. I only had a very physically exerting day yesterday that made me fall asleep.” You smiled warmly, and reached out to shake his hand. He let out a quiet ‘NYEH HEH HEH!’, and took your hand in his with great enthusiasm. He shook it very fast, almost violently, causing your hand to hurt from how tight his grip was. He may have a heart of gold and puppy eyes, but his grip was stronger than yours, which was quite the feat.

“isn’t it rude to talk about someone who’s listening?” You recognized the deep, lazy voice near automatically, and turned your attention to the slightly shorter skeleton, and took in his appearance. You hadn’t the day before, so while the two were distracted with each other you could examine what he truly looked like.

He wore a periwinkle fur lined coat, a light peach faux fur around his hood. It had dark grey pockets in the front, which his mittened hands always seemed to be stored in. He wore a pair of basketball shorts that hung slightly over his knee caps, which were bordered with a pair of socks and a pair of indigo chucks. You would assume they were Converse, your favorite shoe brand, but it was unlikely down here. How would monsters get brand name anything anyways? There had to be something that kept them trapped down here, and with many monsters having teleportation abilities, you were almost sure of it.

Sans’ outfit choices seemed a bit more relaxed than Papyrus’ detailed and intricate armor. It matched their personalities though, since Sans was lazy, and Papyrus seemed rather assertive and serious. His eye sockets were dark underneath, something you thought appeared to be bags under his eyes.

You flashed a small smile, and waved unnoticeably with your left hand. “Mornin’, lazybones. Seems I’ve met the brother you briefly talked about last night.” You snickered, breaking your intense handshake with Papyrus. You missed the contact, you had to admit, but you ignored the intrusive thought. Sans was sitting cross legged on the carpet, being near the opposite corner your head had slammed into. His hand was propping him up, his elbow resting on his left leg. He lazily opened his left eye, and stared at the two of you.

He seemed to nod off again, and Papyrus huffed in response. “NORMALLY, THIS IS THE TIME WHERE I’D BE YELLING FOR YOU TO WAKE UP, SANS. BUT, YOU’RE IN LUCK. IT’S STILL RATHER EARLY BEFORE OUR SHIFT.”

 

“Oh, do you guys have anything you’d like before you have to leave? Maybe I could make you breakfast or something?” You asked, nervously, yet subconsciously, picking at your already worn down nails. Papyrus’ eyes seemed to theoretically sparkle, and his gloved hands clapped together in what you could only guess was glee. Papyrus’ then slammed his hands on your shoulders, causing your relaxed demeanor to tense back up once more. “THAT IS A _MAGNIFICENT_ IDEA! WE SHALL MAKE SPAGHETTI!” You heard the groan from Sans, and you couldn’t hide the look of confusion on your face. Maybe spaghetti for breakfast was common practice in monster culture? You just couldn’t think of that being right, especially since there wasn’t a bit of spaghetti in the time of your stay at Toriel’s.

“how ‘bout you take’m to the store, bro? you can try something new.” You hurriedly nodded your head in agreement at Sans’ suggestion, still being conscious of Papyrus’ hands gripping your shoulders rather harshly. “THAT IS A GREAT SUGGESTION!” Papyrus beamed, and his high pitched voice berated your ears. Suddenly, you were being dragged out of the house by this huge skeleton, and the anxiety that pooled in your stomach made the nausea return.

Being shoved out of a warm house out into the cold almost immediately made your teeth chatter. Even with your sweater and thick pants, you were freezing. Probably due to the snow sticking to your thin shoes, causing you to shudder at the feeling of wet socks. Thankfully, you were dragged into a warm shop that you presumed was this town’s store. Your cold body relaxed quickly in the new atmosphere. Papyrus quickly picked a basket from the stack near the door, and he darted away from you without a second thought.

The way the skeleton zipped from place to place was all too much for you, and you were almost grateful that he’d left you alone in the front of the store. You took in your surroundings, trying to memorize every detail you saw to store in your memory for later. Since breakfast was the course you were preparing, you tried to locate where the foods for it were, your eyes now resting on a section with dry snacks and canned fruits. You decided that since the variety was so little, something like an apple and cherry pie could feed the three of you.

You grabbed a box of “Monster Crackers”, labeled as honey and cinnamon flavored, and placed them in your basket. You then acquired some canned and syruped cherry and apple pie fillings. You made sure to avoid the crackers when you placed the cans in. You quickly located the spices isle, and tried to find brown sugar and cinnamon. You thankfully found them, and placed the two bottles in your basket. On your way to the front counter, you grabbed a pie tin.

It was easy to find the front due to Papyrus’ booming voice practically echoing throughout the store, causing you to roll your eyes with a good hearted chuckle. You approached the counter wearily, and set your basket of baking items as gently as you could on the marble surface, wincing when you heard the cans clack together with a metallic ring. Papyrus then realized your sudden presence, and flashed a smile, slapping his hand on your right shoulder. “AND THIS IS THE NEW FRIEND I WAS SPEAKING OF!” You blushed from the sudden attention, mentally admitting that you had tuned out Papyrus’ conversation with the lavender bunny behind the register. You directed your attention to Papyrus’ basket, not surprised in the least to find various boxed noodles and sauces. What _did_ surprise you was the bottle of ketchup in the corner, partnered with what looked like off brand Red Hot.

You _loved_ hot sauce, and Frank’s Red Hot was the one you were especially fond of. It near screamed home, and reminded you of the times you would pour it on scrambled eggs and ramen with your father during those nights you didn’t have proper food to feed the family. The cashier seemed to take notice of your sudden interest in the glass bottle, and her nose twitched with a smug grin. “Ah’ see yer a fan a’ hot sauce, too. No wonda’ yer friends with ol’ Sans first.” The southern drawl in her tone was shocking, breaking you out of your trance of nostalgia. Her sentence caused your eyes to raise in confusion, not quite understanding what she’d meant behind her words. “Anyhoo, if ya include there's, yer total is 142G.” Papyrus quickly unwrapped a velvet coin purse from one of his belt loops, and dug through the small pouch. He grabbed three large coins, and placed them in the bunny’s outstretched paws.

The bunny snapped, and the items were quickly placed in see through bags, the baskets vanishing and being placed back at the front. Your jaw dropped, never seeing something so complicatedly simple, and you were oblivious to Papyrus now dragging you out the door. “Come back, ya hear?” She called, waving you two as you left the shop.

You were quickly returned to the skeleton household, invisibags in hand. Papyrus literally kicked the door in, rushing to the kitchen with snow on his trail. You were a bit more careful, kicking the snow off your shoes and placing them on the rug near the door to dry. You also dusted the clumps of snow now gathered on the door from Papyrus’ assault back on the ground. You then made your way to where Papyrus had ran, presuming it was the kitchen. You were met with cabinets flying open and bags everywhere, boxes of pasta broken open and pouring all over the floor. “Oh, Papyrus, n–” You were interrupted with a glass jar of pasta flung at your face, slamming straight into your nose. You crumpled to the ground, hands cupping your nose in hope to stop the blood flow that had begun. Papyrus seemed oblivious to your new injury, and you groaned in pain. You pushed yourself off the ground, and drug yourself up the stairs. You were met with three doors, one with a multitude of stickers drug across it, one of them being blank, and another one having fire underneath it? You didn’t even bother to ask.

You knocked on the door with nothing on it or beneath it, thankful to be met with silence. You pushed open the wooden door, and winced at the huge smear of blood that smudged the door handle. You tried to find the lightswitch, and were fumbling around in the dark trying to locate it. Your blood covered hands smudged blood on the white tiles of the wall, and you groaned once again in pain. Your vision was getting a bit blurry, and you tried to blink away the tears that gathered in your eyes. You finally located the light switch, and flipped it almost frantically.

You’d never been happier to find that you had successfully entered the bathroom, and you turned on the faucet, trying to wipe the blood off your hands and face. The sink was filled with red, and you didn’t know your nose _could_ bleed this much, especially since you’d never had a  nosebleed unless there was injury involved.

You fumbled with the towel that was hung on the wall, and accidentally brushed it against your nose a bit too hard. You yelped in pain, and quickly jerked your hand away from your face. The blood flow was still rather prominent, and you tried to see through your cloudy vision into the mirror above the sink. Your pupils constricted with horror, to find your nose displaced and shoved to the side, many yellow and purple bruises littering the bridge of it. It was very crooked, and you backed away from the mirror, desperately trying to find any sense of balance.

Instead, what you got was a hand on yours, but you were too dizzy to even realize who it was before collapsing on the floor. You quickly slipped unconscious, not hearing a word of the mysterious person who’d found you in this condition.

Whoops.


	6. Apologies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Who knew that would happen?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is a bit shorter since i was at a loss. each area was supposed to be only 2-3 chapters, but hooray, snowdin is 4-5. happy? i hope so.  
> this chapter is pretty fluffy and rushed, ill admit. ill be on winter break soon so hopefully i can give an extra long and non rushed chapter next time!!!!! hope u enjoy
> 
> [tumblr](http://madjicks.tumblr.com)

“jp.”

What?

  
“jp.”

What!

  
“JP!”

You barely opened your eyes, and felt a hand placed on your cheek. You guessed it had smacked you awake, since the side of your face stung. “Come on, Friz! I’m trying to sleep… You know better.” You closed your eyes again, and rolled over. “who’s friz?” He responded, which made your eyes furrow in response. “You, dumbass. Don’t play these games with me again, you know how I am when I’m groggy!” You grumbled, digging your face further into the pillow, only to lurch back when the shot of pain shot through your nose.

You fell off the bed, and hit the floor with a thud, causing your body to fall choicely limp. You groaned at the sudden action, and rubbed your sides with some sort of need to dull the pain. You rubbed your eyes as well, and grit your teeth. “Now look what you’ve done…” You growled, now pushing yourself off the ground, and blinked your eyes open and close. You slammed your hands against the carpet, and finally opened your eyes to be greeted with a grimacing white face.

“O-Oh, Sans! Sorry… I thought I was…” You trailed off, trying to ignore your missings of the surface as a whole. Sans shrugged in response to your apology, and his normal smile returned, even if it was a bit forced. “‘s no big deal. but i do got one question for ya,” he squinted, his hands slipping into his pockets. “who’s friz? you seemed to call me that quite a lot in your sleepy state.” You flushed at his question, even though he was asking one that was inevitable. Just, to call this skeleton monster the name of someone you’ve loved for 2 years is uh… Uncomfortably awkward.

“He’s my,” you paused, fiddling with your hands. Why couldn’t you get this simple sentence out of your mouth? It seemed impossible. Maybe it was because you realized you may never see him again? Or that he may forget about you. Sure, it’s only been two days, but it felt like forever. Maybe there were different time zones and calendars down here. It wouldn’t shock you. You rubbed your scabbed arms nervously, subconsciously picking at the hardened bits of dead skin. Sans brows slowly crawled higher, and you couldn’t ignore the single bead of sweat that trailed down your head. “He’s my friend, with benefits.” You grinned shyly, finally glad to get it out, even if it was a lie. You grabbed your orange hair and tugged on it repeatedly, alternating between hands.

“i dunno if it’s just towards me, but you’re a horrible liar.” Sans laughed darkly, eyes going black. You couldn’t help the shiver that swam through your body, and the tenseness that swarmed it as well. Oh god, were you really that anxious? None of this felt right, everything felt off and wrong. “Okay, okay. He’s my boyfriend.” You huffed, hiding your reddened face in your hands. Why were you even flustered over this! It made no sense. “I don’t know if he’ll want me anymore though…”

“and why’s that?” Sans asked, his eyelights flicking back into their regular place. You let out a breath you didn’t even knew you were holding, and were grateful for the relaxed pace. “I don’t know how he’ll feel after this long of no contact. He’s clingy, and having me gone will make him either mad or sad. He’s a basket case of emotions.” You stated, wringing your sweaty hands together. At least that wasn’t a lie. For some odd reason, lying to Sans felt wrong, especially with how easily he saw through your first one. It was a bad habit, one you had from years of abuse as a child and a way to cover up your emotions from your mother. “Sorry for lying, it’s a self defense mechanism. Usually I can do it a lot better but, you caught me off guard.” You confessed, shoving one of your cheeks into your hand.

“no biggy.” He shrugged, pushing himself off the ground. “now, could ya get out of my bro’s bedroom? he’s worried sick about ya.” He motioned towards the door, jabbing at the air with his thumb. You perked up, and hazily pushed yourself off the ground. You brushed off your pants, and shuffled your way to the door. Sans was slightly ahead of you, and made his way to the staircase. You couldn’t ignore the huge splotches and literal pools of blood in front of you on the tiles of the bathroom floor, but now that you were a bit more conscious, you remembered what had happened. Holy shit, you didn’t think you could bleed that much. It gave you future ideas that you locked away somewhere deep in your mind.

So _that’s_ why your nose hurt so much when you nuzzled yourself into the sheets. You broke it, well, more like Papyrus broke it. Having a thick glass jar flung at your face hard is gonna hurt, and you were happy that it only broke your nose. You must have passed out from blood loss, or so you guessed, because you couldn’t remember anything other than smearing blood on the light switch.

You placed your now non blood encrusted hands on the railing as you made your way down, and made sure to be careful not to slip, since the ballet slip ons you were wearing had little to no traction. Thankfully, you were light footed, 100kg+ or not. You had trained yourself from an early age to stay quiet around the house, make sure not to make the floors creak, since it was common for you to sneak downstairs to get a snack to last you through a dinnerless night. Always stay near set furniture, memorize which boards squeak and ones that don’t, stay light footed and quite literally on your toes. It could save your life, for pete’s sake.

You let out a sigh, and finally hit the last step, that staircase seemingly going on forever. It didn’t settle properly in your stomach, and for a while you couldn’t shake away the feeling no matter what. The scene you were greeted with at the bottom of the stairs was a bit more surprising than you’d think, especially since there was a wailing Papyrus draped dramatically over their couch. You chuckled at his antics, and made your way over to the overly tall skeleton.

“I BROKE THE HUMAN, SANS! NOW I WON’T BE A PART OF THE ROYAL GUARD!!!” This poor skeleton seemed utterly distraught, and you had to force your hands to your lips to keep them from splitting and letting out that ugly guffaw you were suppressing. It was just...So, out there. It was comedic to say the least, but the look Sans shot you after this action made any bit of laughter drain from your body near instantaneously.

“Well, you didn’t exactly break me, Papyrus. I mean, I’m right here!” You said semi nervously, a very hidden, yet crazed look in your eyes. The shorter skeleton was starting to frighten you a bit more than you would like, and the way you would have that look of lingering stares on you everytime he was around was nerve wracking. Going this rate, you doubted you’d ever even befriend him, even though he seemed plenty fine last night! Who knows, people either love you or hate you. He’s probably leaning more towards hate.

Wait, why do you even care? You won’t even be here much longer, you had to move farther.

“I mean, you broke my nose, but that’s fine. Nothing a little monster candy won’t fix.” You fakely grinned, reaching into your sports bra to grab a wrapped piece of fruit flavored butterscotch. You popped it in your mouth, sucking on it delightfully. Sadly, your nose didn’t shift back into place, but at least the dull ache had vanished. You scrunched up your nose, and were happy to not feel even the slightest bits of pain. It was more awkward feeling than anything, a painless pinch. Sort of like when you squeeze skin really hard but it doesn’t hurt.

Noticing that the poor skelly was still in a ball of tears, you waved your hands around rather frantically. You were desperately trying to tame his tears, awkwardly making gestures to your nose to signify it was alright. Your action’s reminded you of Isabelle from Animal Crossing, mainly when she felt worried for the player and their decisions. Papyrus seemed to still have not calmed down, no matter how much you panickedly tried to tame him, he still flailed around like a child throwing a tantrum. You let out a sigh, the nervous anxiety clawing at the walls of your stomach. The only thing you could relate to Papyrus’ current behavior to was that of a child, but you got the vibe that he wasn’t one, especially due to his stature and abundant vocabulary. You joked mentally about Literary Arts majors loving him, for sure.

Looking to Sans for some sort of assistance, you were instead greeted with him absent, and you whipped around frantically to see where he had disappeared to. You didn’t even realize that he was now at his brother’s side, running his mittened hands over his skull. He was shushing him, trying to calm him down, and you couldn’t help the affectionate warmth that swarmed in your chest. It reminded you of the times you would have to soothe your brother from his tantrums over not having food to eat, to which you would usually sneak out of the house and steal some food from the local grocery store or 7/11.

You gulped down the unpleasant memory, clenching and unclenching your fists to try and prevent the impending meltdown you would soon have once all of your situations really did enclose on you. You were in your own place now, and you assumed that dissociation would soon set in and nothing would be truly real in your eyes, if only for a few moments.

It was nice, being in a place of just, emptiness. A lot of people describe dissociation differently, but for you, it was like being in a blank room of feeling numb and to reflect on your inner self. Sadly, it left your currently alive body still and motionless, no blinking and very shallow breathing. A lot of people would be scared that you were having a seizure, but as someone who has had drug induced ones, you clearly knew the difference. So you were here, just standing as Sans’ comforted his brother. But what you didn’t notice was how after all that happened, they were staring at you as you were there, staring at the window blankly. They didn’t know why you were as you were, but they simply waited for it to end.

You were soon back to consciousness, and you quite literally jerked yourself out of it. You stared at the brothers confusedly, and remembered where you were. Underground, Skeleton Household, Snowdin. Alright, focus your vision.

And now you stared at the two, minor disorientation clouding your visibly tired eyes. You noticed the concern present in their own, and the wave of remorse felt near drowning to you.You felt your eyes begin to water, and you automatically rubbed away the gathering tears. They didn’t need to see you cry, no one ever did. But, the rivers seemed to start their downpour on your cheeks, and you shoved the sleeves of your sweater onto your face, desperate to mop it all up. “S-Sorry…” You mumbled, voice completely broken and shaky. You were trying to prevent this incoming breakdown to save for a later time, but it seemed that wasn’t a choice now.

Rubbing your eyes raw, you sneezed, but jumped at the foreign presence that surrounding you. One set of arms were wrapped wrapped around your shoulders, and another wrapped around your middle. This caused the amount of tears in your eyes to double, and you kept mumbling sorry to these poor monster. You were more talking to yourself than anyone, the overwhelming fear of being yelled at for crying. A red finger was placed to your lips, causing their trembling to slow to a stop. “It is quite alright, JP. We are here to comfort you.” Papyrus spoke, and even though you had only just met him, this lowered tone he used with you felt somehow sacred. You hesitantly nodded your head in response, gulping down any remaining sobs left in your throat.

You felt the arms around your core tighten, and a skull nuzzle in a bit closer to your abdomen. “as always, i agree with my bro. sorry you got into this mess.” You stared down at Sans, and let out a breathy laugh. “You two…” You smiled, wrapping your own arms around their shoulders, pulling them even deeper into a now requited group hug.

“You two are gonna be the death of me, I swear.”


	7. Exasperation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bonedoggling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> man this chapter was p hard to finish tbh. ive had writers block and what not so its been hard to write this anymore. 
> 
> this chap is p domestic and what not, but the end gets p rumbily. 
> 
> merry late christmas!!
> 
> [tumblr](http://madjicks.tumblr.com)

After your uneventful cuddle session with the skeletons, you decided it was time to finally bake the pie that you had bought the ingredients for earlier in the morning. You made your tired body over to the kitchen, since Papyrus had ran out of the house claiming to need to do something, and your lazy face brightened with a smile to find a particular skeleton sitting on the counter, waving at you with the same tired gaze the two of you shared constantly.

“Hey, Sans.” You murmured, trying to pick up the boxes of pasta that were haphazardly thrown all over the floor, and scooped the little bits of rotini and angel hair into your hands. “Hate to be a bother, but could you help me clean up?” You didn’t get a response, but him hopping off the counter onto the floor was good enough. He crouched down onto the tiles, and started scooping them up into his hands, which you noted were no longer wearing mittens. 

After a couple minutes, the two of you had cleaned the floors of the kitchen successfully, making your mood brighten by quite a bit. Sans seemed satisfied with the cleanliness as well, letting out a content sigh once you both had finished. You cracked your knuckles, and then got to baking. “Do you wanna help?” He nodded, and you couldn’t help the light smile that graced your face. The way he was too lazy to even respond was silly, and it made your somewhat gloomy day brighter. “Alright, so first of all, we need to break the crackers so I can make a crust. Can you hand me the pie tin?”

“sure.” He grinned, grabbing the tin out of the bag and placing it in your hands, and he decided you’d want the monster crackers to break as well, so he slipped those into the tin too. “Oh, thanks!” You smiled, and he closed his eyes happily. “what next, boss?” You tapped your chin thoughtfully, and then, as if a lightbulb had appeared above your head, you gasped. “Can your magic crush these? It would make everything a lot easier!” Sans’ smile slightly fell, him not liking to use his magic unless necessary. It was strenuous to him, but he decided that he would humor you. He murmured an okay, and snapped his fingers, causing all the crackers in the box to break into miniscule pieces. “Ohh, lovely! Thank you!” Your enthusiasm caused his negative side to dissipate, and a relaxed grin rested on his face once more.

You then mixed the cracker bits with eggs, flour, and a touch of vanilla extract, as well as a bit of brown sugar. You then washed your hands, and got to work on shaping the crust in the tin. “Do you want me to make cherry or apple first?”

“i’m fine with either, heh. anything other than spaghetti is a nice break for me.” You wondered what he meant by that, but then remembered what you had just cleaned up. Papyrus must have made spaghetti on a daily basis to where he was sick of it. “Cherry, it is~.” You hummed, grabbing one of the cans from the bag, and pulling the tab to bend into it. It broke open with ease, and you poured the contents into the pie crust. 

You spread out the cherry filling with a spoon, and then put a dash of brown sugar on the top. You then picked up the tin, and made your way over to the oven, which had already been preheating due to Sans being generous. You smiled at the skelly, and then put the tin inside. “Since I only bought one tin, we have to bake them individually, so we gotta wait…” You said nonchalantly. Sans shrugged in response, and walked out of the kitchen into the living room, to which you followed.

You both sat down on the couch, thankful for the cushions engulfing the two of you. Sure, the couch wasn’t even that great, since it had a bunch of broken springs and rips in the cover, but it just... It felt great to relax, especially after constantly being on your feet for so long. You’d be lying if you missed being able to be as lazy as Sans.

“So…”

“so…”

You both cut each other off, and you quickly reassured Sans that it was okay for him to speak first. “so how’d you make your way to snowdin?” He asked quizzically, but his question had a hint of malice lacing it. Your natural instinct was to lie about your situation, but with how he acted before, you knew that wouldn’t be wise. You wrung your hands together, nibbling on your dry lips anxiously. “Um…” You whispered, trying to think of a way to not lie but to avoid the topic, but it still felt wrong. You just couldn’t lie to him, something in your heart fought against it. You broke eye contact, and stared at the floor. “look, if you don’t wanna answer, you don’t have to. i already know how.” Those were dangerous words, words you were all too familiar with due to your mother and how she always acted as if she knew everything about you. You didn’t like his tone of voice, and to be honest, it made you want to flee to the next area, but with him being able to teleport… You knew that wasn’t an option.

“I got shoved out of the Ruins. Against my will.” You finally admitted, closing your eyes tight and shrinking in on yourself to try and avoid the worst. You were expecting some sort of scream or assault, but it never came. It was so hard to break habits you had only up until recently, where they were no longer needed, but Sans’ hatred of liars and being protective of his family reminded you too much of the good side of your mother. It was hard to not think of him  _ not _ being abusive. 

“hey...hey, no need to flinch.” He cooed, pushing his hands out and trying to lock them in yours. You avoided them though, too afraid and mentally shaken to really touch anyone, monster or not. “look, i know i made a shitty first impression,” you were pleasantly surprised by the expletive that slipped out of his mouth, “but i’m just not used to humans, alright? all the experiences i’ve ever had with them have ended negatively. i’m sorry.” And there it was, the apology. But, it sounded genuine, something your mother wouldn’t have known if it quite literally put a double barrel shotgun to her head.

For that you were thankful, and you let your tense body relax very slightly, not enough to be noticeable by anyone else who wasn’t completely focused on you. “I accept your apology, thanks.” You mumbled, rubbing the top of your sore thighs. You were happy to meet someone like Sans, someone who was mature, lazy, but still knew how to have fun. He must have realized you were slightly smiling, because he let out a breathy laugh. It was pleasant. “well, let’s stop actin’ like awkward teens and kick back an’ watch some TV, eh?” He asked, normal facade of a funny guy switching back into action. You nodded happily, and put your feet on the coffee table in front of you. “Sounds like a plan.” You grinned, lazily staring at the tube tv in front of you.

It reminded you of the TV you had when you were in poverty in Detroit. Your family had found it on the curb across the street, having been rescued from a drug lab induced house fire. It was a decent television for its time, and you were all delighted to finally have something to gather around during those nights you did have dinner, or the nights when your grandpa came home drunk and you all had to hide in your shared room. It was an escape for you all.

That was back when you were a single child, being the tender age of 4 and watching Sesame Street enthusiastically on the telly. Back when Mr Rogers Neighborhood aired on a daily basis and you loved Zoboomafoo. Honestly, who didn’t? The Kratt Brothers are fucking awesome.

You had slipped into a dopey state, eyes falling against your will, even if you fought to pry them open. It seemed Sans had fallen straight into comatose, snoring on the cushion next to you. You let out a breathy laugh, and decided to let your focus fall onto the TV.

There was a rectangular robot in a red pin-striped suit, currently holding a microphone to his multicolored screens. His voice was rather sharp, and robot-y. That’s really the only way you could describe it, in all honesty. He was talking about something pertaining to ghosts obtaining corporeality, and you were confused by the term. Didn’t that mean like, when they fuse with an item? You couldn’t even believe there were ghosts down here, and then you remembered Napstablook from the Ruins. You thought it was just another monster shaped like human myths, but apparently not.

Letting out a yawn, you were about to fall asleep until the ding from the oven shocked you awake. It was pretty jolting, but you flung yourself off the couch and semi-panickedly rushed into the kitchen. You nabbed the oven mitts off the side of the refrigerator, and slid them onto your hands, opening the oven in the process. The pie had turned out lovely, and you let a soft smile slip onto your facial features. You let out a soft whistle, and grabbed the tin out of the pink tinted oven. You placed it on the top of the stove, and got to work preparing the next one.

“looks pretty tasty.” Sans greeted, his body leaned against the door frame of the kitchen. You flashed a smile, and slipped the gloves off your hands. “Thanks to you, I don’t have to break all the crackers to make another.” You hummed, grabbing the crackers out of the bed and setting up to make another crust. “When will your brother be back?” You asked, still somewhat absorbed in your activity of Apple pie baking. “no idea, i can call him if need be.” He grunted, closing his eyes and sliding to the floor. You let out a content sigh as you made this pie somewhat faster since you had a vague idea of what you were doing. “That’s your call, not mine. I don’t even have a charger for my phone.” You didn’t notice, but Sans’ eyes practically sparkled at your unintentional pun, whether you noticed the pun or not, he found it groundbreaking. You were still weary of using your phone, not even having the thought of it possibly being shattered. Your brows furrowed as you thought of maybe calling your boyfriend to let him know you were okay, but something in your gut told you not to.

“Alright, pie two going in now.” You slid it into the oven, and tutted at Sans trying to sneak away a piece of the cherry pie. “Uh uh. If you want it that bad, go phone your brother and then we can all dig in.” You grinned facetiously, waggling your fingers in his face. He let out a grunt, and shoved his hands in his coat pockets. “ok.” He lazily smiled, letting his eyes rest on your form. While he dug his phone out of his seemingly infinite spaced pockets, he examined the way you looked.

You were 162cm at best, and around 101kg, but not like he was gonna ask that. It was rude to ask anyone their weight, especially in your guys’ situation. Sans hadn’t made the best first impression, so digging for anything personal was an unspoken sin in his eyes.

You had long darkish orange hair, it falling just above your calves. You had a long scar along your right cheek, dipping right above the bridge of your nose. It was rather visible, and he couldn’t help but wonder where it had came from. With one that deep, it had to have been something serious, and he grimaced at the reminder of his own scars.

He had many chips in the bones along his ribcage, reminding him of past, much more brutal timelines. It was the reason he didn’t wear only a jacket anymore, instead donning a white turtleneck nowadays. He remembered the first face of shock on that horrible child’s face when they saw his new apparel, but they hid it behind dark eyes.

That look had ingrained itself in his mind, and it made Sans’ facial features fall. He didn’t want to compare you to that monster, but his broken mind really couldn’t help it. You were human, and any monster who could remember the timelines as clearly as he could would have the same bias. This timeline had been rather domestic overall, although. But, he was still at a loss because you were very different from the only human he’d ever met. Frisk was a child, one with genocidal intentions in their eyes, whether they pleaded the lie of possession or not. 

You were an adult, one with a completely different outlook on life. He’d seen those flashes of grief in your eyes that you guarded away from everyone, and his role as Judge made him have to notice these things. Yet, you still had a lot of things about you he didn’t know, and it made him so scared to associate himself with you at all. “alright, gimme a sec. gonna call pap.” He mumbled, finally fishing his phone out of his pockets. 

He shuffled into the living room, tapping his fingers along the phone’s touch screen. He swiped through his contacts to find his brother’s, and when he did, he near smashed his thumb into the glass. He placed the device to the side of his head, and closed his eyes as he flopped down onto the couch. The line rung once or twice, before being picked up. “HELLO, BROTHER! WHAT IS IT?” Papyrus asked from the other side of the line, and Sans quickly informed him of the pies being done soon. Papyrus let him know that he would be home lickity split, and not to worry. He let out an amused sigh at his brother’s response, but it was refreshing to have a new set of dialogue come from his brother’s mouth. He was so used to the almost stale and typical strings of speak pour from it.

He hadn’t even noticed that you had finished putting the pie in the oven, until you walked into the living room and greeted him. “hey.” He responded, slipping his phone back into his pockets, along with his hands. “Are you alright?” You asked, genuine concern for his well being. His smile seemed a bit strained and his eyelights were missing, things you took notice of happening when he was plagued with negativity. All of those little details seemed to slip away near instantaneously, and you saw your chance of getting to know Sans a bit better melt away with them.

“nothin’ to worry about, bud. what about you?” He asked, tilting his head in your direction on the couch. You fiddled with your hands a bit, absentmindedly picking at your nails that had grown a bit too long for your liking. “I’m a bit tired, I’ll admit. Wish I could just sleep for a week.” You joked, still somewhat anxiety ridden from your current predicament. It’d be a lie to say you weren’t still nervous around this skeleton, but you tried to suppress it to the best of your ability.

“Did Papyrus say when he’d be home?” You asked, finally making eye contact with Sans. He nodded, but then lazily shrugged. “he said soon, i dunno when though.” He mumbled, and you could feel the awkward silence begin to grow. You wondered where the previous warm atmosphere had ran off to, but didn’t dare to try and locate it.

All the tension vanished from the area when you realized the front door had been kicked open, snow flying into the living room, causing you grimace. Papyrus’ booming voice startled you both from your daze, and you shot up from the couch. Sans didn’t seem to care, almost seeming as if he was sinking further into the couch himself. You let out a shy smile and a wave at Papyrus, and he ushered you to the kitchen as he grabbed the plates from high up cabinets. “I SEE YOU HAVE MADE TWO PIES, IS IT ONE FOR EACH?”

“Ahh, nope. I just thought having multiple flavors would be nice in case one of you didn’t like either.” You said, trying to locate the silverware drawer. Papyrus quickly directed you to where it was, and you slipped them out of the slots they were in. Papyrus had set the chipped ceramic plates around the living room table, and you silently giggled at the reminiscence of home. 

He sat down with a fork and butterknife in each of his hands, almost like the stereotypical cartoon action of waiting for dinner while licking your lips. You chuckled at his childlike mannerisms, and quickly sliced up the pie to give to the brothers. You cut a somewhat small one for yourself, your appetite missing due to your anxiousness plaguing your stomach. You felt bad about it, but did so anyway. You slipped the remaining slices of pie into the oven, letting out a tired sigh as you did so.

You walked into the living room with three plates, each holding two slices of pie, minus your own. You had a single piece of cherry for yourself, since it was one of your favorite type of fruit pies. You sat down on the stained carpet, and picked at your pie with a fork, not even really wanting to eat this miniscule slice. Papyrus and Sans seemed to be enjoying the slices you’d made, and the warmth that grew in your chest was nice. You rarely had anyone to enjoy your cooking or baking, always having it to yourself due to somewhat chosen solitude.

The brothers seemed to be thankful though, Sans mumbling something under his breath about it being so much better than spaghetti, and you giggled at his remark. Papyrus finished his plate rather quickly, and sat his silverware on the table, hitting their mark with a clink against the glass in the middle. “WELL! THAT WAS A SPLENDID MEAL, AND THAT’S COMING FROM SUCH A GREAT COOK AS MYSELF! IT COULD USE A BIT MORE GLITTER, ALTHOUGH.” You stared at Papyrus with amused shock, putting your fork down yourself. “Uh, glitter?” 

“YES, GLITTER. DO YOU NOT USE THAT IN YOUR FOODS? IT EXPLAINS A LOT.” You were sure he hadn’t meant it, but that had been an insult in your eyes, causing you to feel a lot smaller and unworthy. Your lips trembled without you realizing it, but you were happy to know there were no tears to accompany it. “Y-Yeah. I guess so.” Sans had looked at you with sympathetic eyes, and you stared at your pie blankly. It was too dry, and you hadn’t added enough sugar, so it was a bit sour. You suddenly felt no longer compelled to eat, and you took your slice into the kitchen to dump it in the trash. Thankfully it was small. 

“WELL, SINCE WE HAVE NOW BEEN FILLED TO THE BRIM WITH USELESS CALORIES, WE SHALL BURN THEM OFF WITH A SPAR!” Papyrus proclaimed, and you felt your pupils contract. Spar? With a monster? Oh god, you were going to die, weren’t you? All you hoped for would be that Papyrus would take it easy on you, but you doubted it. You also noted how Sans had tensed at his proclamation, and you suddenly felt like this was a horrible idea. “Okay.” You whispered, near dragging yourself back into their area. 

“WELL WHAT ARE WE WAITING FOR? LET’S GO!”

You gulped, palms more sweaty than ever before.

You were going to die.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> woo hoo we get to fight papyrus next chapter!!! finally getting out of snowdin hjrfnkdckfd


	8. Abnormality

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Behind the scenes viewing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey!! i finally got back into my undertale kick and i have a bit more inspiration for this fic now. thanks to your guys' comments, i also feel a lot more motivated!! theyre really important to me, and having none for a while was a kick in the gut.  
> here's a proper chapter 8! i hopee you guys enjoy, even if its a shorter chapter. i promise chapter 9 will be awesome!  
> edit: sorry for the mess up. the wingdings i originally had in this chapter made it shorter for some reason. i fixed it though!!
> 
> [tumblr](http://madjicks.tumblr.com)

“She’s taking too long.” Chara growled, arm’s folded while facing Frisk. They were growing tired of your aimless shenanigans. Your adventures in the Ruins were quick, but Snowdin was taking far longer than they would’ve liked. The damn skeleton’s seemed to always distract Frisk too, and Chara’s eyes couldn’t help but squint at the endless darkness surrounding them.

‘ _Let her explore, she doesn’t have the knowledge we do. And, since you decided to keep me here, she doesn’t have you to guide her either. She’s on her own._ ’ Frisk signed, hands flashing sporadically in Chara’s direction. The thing is, Chara didn’t _care_ about how curious you were. You had a mission, and that was to go through the Underground successfully, not dink around with some monsters that were better off without the childish adult. Chara huffed, arms tightening even closer around their chest. “Sure, whatever you say Mx Pacifist.” Frisk seemed to bristle at the title, but did nothing to fight the dismissal.

‘ _What can we even do in here? It’s boring and dark._ ’ Frisk asked, mouth falling into an unseen frown. Chara did feel somewhat bad for trapping them here, but they had no choice. If they didn’t, Frisk would just escape and try to aid JP in her adventures. Maybe that wouldn’t be a bad idea.

They let their feet fall to the floor with mild exasperation, boots splashing in the weird ooze of the void. “Do you want me to call up Gaster? Maybe he can give us some stuff to do. I’m used to nothingness, but I know you aren’t.” Frisk nodded enthusiastically, and Chara chortled at the child’s excitement. Gaster was a friend of Chara’s, not exactly meeting the same fate as them, but he still was trapped in this area of darkness. They cleared their throat, and quickly went on with the unknown language only the ex-doctor spoke.

The request was garbled, but it got Chara’s message through. They heard the odd noise Gaster made when he made an appearance, and the warm smile that glimpsed Chara’s face showed their suppressed delight.

He first started speaking in his own language, before realizing that the two of them couldn't understand it as fluently as he could. “AHEM, MY APOLOGIES. HELLO CHILDREN, WHAT IS IT YOU WANT TODAY?” He asked, melty smile clear on his broken face. “Nothing much, the kid over here is bored and wanted to play.”

“OH, HOW DELIGHTFUL! HELLO FRISK, WHAT IS UP?” He asked, eye’s crinkled with happiness to greet a familiar face. Frisk jumped up at the monster, and Gaster cupped them with his hands. “A HUG? OH, HOW NICE!” He grinned, spinning around the child with downright glee. “IT HAS BEEN QUITE A WHILE SINCE I COULD HOLD A CHILD OF YOUR SIZE THIS HIGH!” Chara couldn’t help the big smile that broke their normal glare, seeing Frisk happy with an old friend of theirs was pleasant. The two had always made them rather happy, their friendship surprisingly domestic even if they barely knew each other. Chara was glad to keep it that way, the two didn’t need to know each other’s pasts. It was sometimes better to simply keep things quiet.

Chara folded their arms even tighter, mild pouting littering among their gestures, and they sat down in the vantablack liquid around all of them. They needed to think, and for Frisk to be distracted by Gaster, it gave the time they needed.

They let out a sigh, and absentmindedly dipped their left hand into the bank, letting the blood thick liquid drip through their hands. It was a minor fidget of theirs, and Chara liked to do it quite often, especially when they needed some sort of distraction.

You were an anomaly. That was for sure, and Sans’ thoughts about you were quite concerning. Yes, they weren’t wrong, but there were things about you that he didn’t need to know. Chara knew of your violent side, mainly due to their ability to read through code like a mad man. But, the thing was, is that your past, other than the things you think about to yourself, was glitched and near nonexistent. There wasn’t any trace unless you somehow thought of it and the reception cut through to Chara. But, that was rare. You were an even bigger anomaly than when Gaster had made his presence once more in the 173rd timeline. Chara had been messing around with FUN values to somehow add more of a spin to the current timeline Frisk had been going through, and surprise! Gaster had appeared in an unknown door in Waterfall. When Frisk went to interact with him, he jumped in shock and disappeared, somehow fading into the place where Chara currently was located. They’d be lying to say they weren’t pleasantly surprised by an old friend appearing in front of their eyes again.

And yet, you had no correlation with the Underground. Sure, you tried to commit suicide like they had done years ago, but it was due to hallucinations. You also didn’t have the red heart that signifies determination like Chara and Frisk, yet you could loosely utilize the save points located around the Underground.

There were so many unknown variables in this timeline that it had almost driven Chara to  madness. The _full_ self awareness of Sans; him trying to shoot you the second you left the Ruins. Toriel acting unnatural by shoving you out of the Ruins. Even the little things, like your SOUL and how old you were. Only children had ever fallen down here, so with all these variables, an adult was more important than an average viewer would believe.

And that affected things, for sure, especially since adult humans were the ones who had sealed the monsters down there in the first place. All the monsters seemed a bit wary in general of JP, even though she had the vibe of an airhead. Sure, her stature was moderately intimidating, but it was similar to Toriels.

Well, the monsters in the Ruins always _did_ say Toriel intimidated them.

The one thing that stood out to them though, was the scars. Sans had scars from the previous timelines since Gaster’s existence was still somewhat present, the same goes for Papyrus. That was nothing new. But now, the other boss monsters had scars gathered on their bodies. Mainly where Frisk had struck to kill them, cheeks, chests, whatever.

And that was _horrifying_.

Frisk didn’t need to know any of this, they were fine in their childlike innocence. They’d never had a proper childhood, so Chara figured that at least having Gaster here for them to distract them with was much better than nothing. That would let them relax and enjoy simple magic tricks with the ex doctor.

Although, for now, Chara had to focus on what to do with you next. This timeline was already messed up enough, and for you to come in and enter with an odd neutral run that insists on no harm, it was confusing to say the least. When they rebooted the previous timeline, they never expected this to happen. For you to come in the mix, was odd. They were expecting to shove Frisk in for another neutral ending, this time going for if they only killed Toriel and Asgore, and seeing what ending they would achieve together. Chara wanted more of Gaster’s followers as well, and to show up with only a 10% chance with a low fun value… That would take longer than they would have liked.

Chara was snapped out of their thinking by clapping hands in front of their face. They now stared at Frisk with tired eyes, and Frisk’s frown was almost enough to make them emote something other than bitterness. “What is it.” They mumbled, almost looking through Frisk to the endless void behind them.

‘ _Are you alright? You seem a bit stressed_.’

“Can you honestly blame me? You’ve seen this place, the timelines a mess.”

‘ _I know, but maybe take a break once in a while.’_

“I can’t. I have things to figure out.”

‘ _Please?_ ’

Chara relented to this shorter child with mild hesitation, but it would be a lie to say they didn’t want to accept their offer with no reluctance. They _were_ tired, and a short break could never hurt anyone. But, only for a few moments.

They walked over to the scene, Frisk’s hand locked in theirs, and plopped down on the floor. Apparently Gaster had been showing off his Blaster prototypes, some of them even donning a whole skeletal body. They reminded Chara of dogs, having the same canine looking skull and long tails. Sadly, the sentient weapons were just prototypes, letting their potential run down the drain like wasted water. They laid their hand on top of the dog looking creature’s skull, subconsciously patting it and running their palm against the smooth surface. There were light divits in its frontal bone, which were to be expected due to its main purpose.

“THESE WERE MY FIRST BLASTER PROTOTYPES. AS YOU CAN SEE, THEY WERE ORIGINALLY INTENDED TO BE LIKE WHAT HUMANS CALL ‘DOGS’. SADLY, MY RESEARCH WAS CUT SHORT ONCE I WAS DEVELOPING THE PROPER DESIGN, AND THAT WAS PASSED ONTO MY SON TO FINISH.” Gaster’s cracked face seemed to lighten a bit, and his eyes were warm. “I AM VERY PROUD OF MY SONS. THEY ARE BOTH MAGNIFICENT MONSTERS.” His tone had been a bit more sad than Chara could have liked, but they understood why he felt this way. He’d been ripped away from his family, and Chara could definitely sympathize and relate to the poor man’s woes.

But, they didn’t have time to really think about the ways to help the ruined monsters. As much as they hated to admit it, they didn’t have the opportunity to help out an old friend. They had to worry about you and what you could possibly do to the timeline. This sparked an idea that lit up their ruby red eyes, and they quickly waved their hand at the doctor.

“Gaster, forgive me if I’m mistaken, but when we got the third human soul, didn’t you experiment on it?” They asked, staring at him with curiosity swimming through their stance. “AH YES, OF COURSE! IS THERE ANYTHING YOU WOULD LIKE TO KNOW ABOUT THEM? I KNOW MODERN HUMANS ARE NOT AKIN TO MAGIC LIKE US MONSTERS.” This is exactly what Chara had hoped he would’ve asked, and Frisk noticed the snotty glint in the fallen child’s eyes. They frowned at them with disappointment, but they simply tutted at the child.

“I’m currently conducting my own experiment. On a living subject, for that matter, and I wanted to ask you questions about them.” They said, slipping their hands into their pockets. Gaster’s singular eye light seemed to brighten up significantly. “OF COURSE. WHAT ARE YOUR QUESTIONS?”

The problem with you mainly, was how weak and broken your soul was. The only monster they could relate your dwindling amounts of hope to was Sans, and he had a measly one. As an adult, you should most likely have more than you have… That currently being five. _Five_ , something Chara couldn’t even dream of achieving, even in their most manic of states. Around Frisk’s age, they’d been the standard 20 for the average red soul, but as they grew older it maxed out around 100. But yours…

Even in all the research Chara had done with Gaster could never prove what was actually wrong with your soul. The two of them had never seen a human soul littered with specks of white, having multiple colors in general was abnormal. To be fair, you really disgusted them. You were a mess, and only proved how ugly humanity truly was.

But, they would never voice that of course.

“Tell me about aspects.”


	9. Elation!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh finally. Some average relaxation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FINALLY.... A GOOD CHAPTER....  
> here's an early chapter for you guys! i was so excited to write it, that i couldn't push off posting it. i hope you enjoy!!  
> just a reminder that leaving comments really makes my day, so even if you could leave a simple one below, it keeps me writing!! happy reading!
> 
> [tumblr](http://madjicks.tumblr.com)

You couldn’t stop scratching at your arms when Papyrus had darted out of the house in a self declared wait for your arrival at the edge of Snowdin. The skin under your fingers was ripped and bleeding, puss slowly dripping down your already infected skin. Sans was currently trying to soothe you to no avail, and you dug your nubs of nails into the scabbed flesh even more. “jp. you gotta stop.” He murmured, moving his hands to run through your hair. His mannerisms reminded you of your boyfriend, and your body immediately tensed. It wasn’t right, you kept comparing the two and it pissed you off to no end. His boney fingers dug lightly into your scalp, working their way around the greasy hair follicles in your head. It was soothing, as much as you hated to admit it.

“oops. tangle.” He laughed, trying to untie the knot that had made its way between the breaks of his fingers. You winced everytime it would pull on the hair, but you knew he had good intentions. It gave you a giggle too, and eventually your anxiety melted away into nothingness. “seems i got caught  _ red handed _ .” He joked, staring at you with a shit eating grin. You stared at him, jaw near on the floor. His smile seemed to falter a bit, starting to wriggle under your vision. Suddenly, you broke into laughter, clutching your sides that burned from the sudden placement of such a good pun.

“Oh. Oh my god.” You laughed, hands attempting to muffle your laughter, but everytime the skeleton laughed along with you, it busted through your body even more. “Come on, Sans, throw me a bone here.” You grinned, wiggling your fingers for extra effect. “I can’t catch a break, so might as well catch an object.” Sans was  _ dying _ at this point. Faintly neon tears had gathered at the edge of his eyes, and his bones literally rattled. “that’s.” He inhaled, trying to catch his breath. “that’s one i’ve never heard before.” He seemed genuinely surprised, and it made your glee grow even further.

“sorry to break the ice, but what’re you gonna do?” You put your cheek in your hand, somewhat pulling yourself together from the anxiety attack that had reared its ugly head earlier. “Well, I have no choice other than to fight him… But, I don’t think I can. He’s too much of a sweetie, even if he is a bit loud.” You were surprised at the exhale Sans let go of, causing you to stare at him in confusion.

“well, i know you don’t have much experience in fighting. maybe i can help you prepare a little?” You were very interested, not really taking Sans as the helpful type other than to family. “That’d be amazing!” You smiled, pushing yourself off of the ground with newfound excitement. Sans shoved himself off of the cocoon of the couch, and made his way to the door. “well? what’re you waiting for? let’s get going.” He spoke cheekily, turning the knob and immediately getting flooded with snow. You had to fight everything in you not to die laughing, especially at the face he made before he got drowned in the stuff.

“goddammit.” You heard from underneath the pile, finally provoking you to let out a few chuckles. “Let me help you outta there, shorty.” You giggled, finally glad to meet someone shorter than you. You heard a growl from underneath the snow, which only made you giggle more.

After that short scenario, the two of you had made your way to a secluded area near the house, it being located near a river. You had stood wearily near it, cold still sort of making your body shiver. “you cold?” You nodded in response, hands rubbing your scratched up arms in an attempt to warm your torso. In a blink of an eye, a coat was chucked at you. “you can wear it for the time being. i know how cold it is down here for humans.”

“But, won’t you be cold?” Before realizing what you said, you immediately regretted your question, the look in Sans eyes notifying you of what he was about to say. “Don’t-”

“nah, goes right through me.” You let out a groan, but it was a good mannered one, a little chuckle accompanying it. “I walked right into that one.” Sans laughed in response, and you quickly shrugged the coat onto your body. You were slowly getting more accustomed to these two, even possibly considering them friends. 

Maybe that was a bit  _ too  _ optimistic.

Once you’d gotten the coat on, your body was flooded with warmth, which felt absolutely amazing. You were about to ask why it was so instant, but figured Sans would be a smartass and just say magic with a wriggle of his fingers. You bit down the question with playful irritation. “Okay, skeleman, what do I have to expect when fighting your bro?” 

“well, i can guarantee my bro won’t kill ya, if that’s what you’re worried about.” God, you could feel the impending doom melt away from your damn body at that simple sentence alone. “I don’t think you’ll ever understand how big a worry that was for me.” Sans seemed to laugh a bit darkly at your statement, but you chose to ignore it to the best of your ability.

“the first thing i can teach ya is about blue attacks. they’re pretty simple.” He snapped his fingers, and three blue bones flew out of the ground, but still remained within it. They were about a meter in front of him, but were close enough for both of you to see them easily. “think of them like… like a stop sign! when you see one, you stop, right?” You nodded.” right. so, think of a stop sign, but it’s  **blue** . that’s basically what blue attacks are. just stay still and you’ll be alright.” You nodded rather enthusiastically, since doing nothing was one of your favorites things to, hehe, not do.

“i’m gonna send a few your way now, alright? remember, stay still.” You grinned, and froze like a statue. The bones had crawled through the snow at a decent pace, and phased through you with ease. They left a mild tingle in your legs, but it wasn’t anything bad. It was like pins and needles, but less uncomfortable. “Sweet! What next?”

“you’re rather enthusiastic, aren’t you?” He asked, eyes warm. You laughed and clapped your hands together. “Yeah! I think magic is super cool. We don’t have anything like this up there.” Sans seemed to agree with what you said, and he slipped his left hand from his folded arms. “now, i’m gonna demonstrate the basics of gravity magic.

His hand snapped upwards, and you felt a tug in your chest. You knew this feeling, it had been something Flowey did when you’d first met. “oh my god.” Sans’ demeanor almost instantly changed, and he ran towards you. You stumbled backwards, somewhat startled by his concern. “what… what happened to you?” He asked, concern flooding his voice. You were confused by his sudden switch, but cupped your SOUL in your hands. “Is… Is this not normal?” You had hoped beyond belief that Flowey had just been a sadistic bastard, but apparently not.

“no… no, not at all. i’ve only ever seen one soul this broken and…” His words trailed off as he went on, and he put his hands below your soul. “i can’t heal this. i don’t think anyone can.” His eyelights had disappeared, and you moved his hands away from your soul. “Ah, sorry… It just, feels private, I guess? I don’t want anyone really… Touching it, or even being near it.” You mumbled, slowly putting it back into your chest. “oh, yeah, sorry.” He grimaced, backing away. You only now just realized the drops of sweat gathered on his skull, and you quickly shifted your worry for yourself onto him. “Are you alright?” You asked, putting out a hand to place on his skull. “y-yeah. i’m fine.” He seemed dazed, and his own hand clutched his head. “magic wears me out.” He mumbled curtly, before staring at you with a shy smile. “Oh… I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to burden you.”

You stared at the shorter skeleton before he seemed to recollect himself. “gimme a sec, i gotta make a phone call.” He quickly went to fish through his pockets, before realizing he didn’t have his coat on. “shit.” You panickedly tried to get said coat off, before he stopped you. “don’t worry about it. you benefit from it more than i do.”

He picked his phone from the front pocket, and tapped along the screen to a number that, you, of course, didn’t recognize. “hey, alph.” 

You fiddled with the strings of his hoodie, enjoying how well made the thing was. It seemed to be laced with some sort of magic too, since you could constantly feel an odd rush of something when wearing it. 

“Y-Yeah, I already know there’s a human. I have the camera’s scattered everywhere.” You heard a nasally female voice come through the phone, and you could only guess they had been discussing you. “Maybe show her yours? I don’t know… I can’t do any p-proper tests until she’s here. You know U-Undyne would pitch a fit if she knew I was t-testing a human without her knowing…” Who is Undyne? You figured it had been another monster down here, and only now had you realized how close you’d gotten to Sans. Seemed eavesdropping had lured you closer. “not so sure about that, but we’ll see what i can do. i’ll talk to you later. bye.” He hung up rather abruptly, and stared at you with an irritated look on his face. His smile had fallen quite a bit.

“Sorry, it’s a bad habit of mine. I gotta know everything.” 

“break the habit then. mind your own business.” You were shocked by his response, and you stared at him somewhat angrily. “Excuse me, last time I checked, this whole thing is about  _ my  _ soul.” You barked, standing your ground on the snow, your legs spread and chest slightly puffed as a way to make yourself look bigger. “Do you want me to die, or something?” 

Sans’ silence told you everything you needed to know.

“Fine.” You barely whispered, ripping the coat off your body. You chucked it at the monster, and shoved your way past him. You’d get through this place one way or another, friendless or not.

At least you still had Papyrus.

Speaking of Papyrus, you really needed to get to know more about the guy. Maybe this spar would help with that more than you would’ve liked. 

You made your way back to Snowdin’s main location in a huff, still somewhat annoyed by Sans cruel nature. You thought you’d truly been making progress with him, but apparently not. He still saw you as a useless meatbag, so you might as well see him equally as a dusty bag of bones.

Okay, maybe not the best analogy to make, but you knew what it meant. 

As you headed out of Snowdin’s relatively straight path, you had noticed how foggy the area had eventually gotten, causing your anxiety to ramp up a bit more than you would have liked. To be completely honest… You regretted your previous action, you could’ve handled it a lot better than you did. But, it’s cold, you feel disgusted with yourself, and you’re off your meds. You weren’t going to act normal anyways.

The only big thing you were missing was the coat, to be fair.

You were rather tired of trying to befriend Sans, only to be shoved away even though he had tried to kill you. Shouldn’t he be the one putting in all the effort? Maybe this is what people meant when they say you’re too easily taken advantage of. It pissed you off to no end, and you wished Sans hadn’t just been a huge dick about this all. He seemed… Racist? That was the only term you could really put on him. It didn’t matter anyways.

You now focused on the silhouette in front of you, cape billowing in the wind and a pose struck so magnificently it could be straight out of Araki Hirohiko’s artwork itself. “FRIEND!” The shadow spoke, and you immediately recognized the voice to be Papyrus’. “TO QUALIFY YOU AS MY FRIEND, I MUST DUEL YOU IN A FRIENDLY MANNER!” He declared, putting a fist to his chestplate. You let out a good hearted laugh at his decree, but your nerves flaring weren’t helping in the least.

What if his brother was lying to you? What if Papyrus did truly have the intent to end your life? It didn’t seem that he recognized you as a human yet, but still. With how two-sided monsters had been down here, your already severe lack of trust was dwindling to dangerously low amounts. Without even a moments warning, your broken soul was jerked from your body. Papyrus seemed to pay no attention to it’s shattered state, shoving your normally color filled world into that of one that was merely black and white. It reminded you of old RPGs. 

Thanks to your mini training session with Sans, you were warmed up for this fight the two of you were having. Except, the only different thing was that you didn’t really understand this mechanics. You had four boxes placed in front of you, similar to when you had saved way back in the Ruins for the first time. They were each labeled with a singular word. There was ‘FIGHT’, ‘ACT’, ‘ITEM’, and lastly, ‘SPARE’. You’d never seen an action like spare before, but you hoped it meant you could get through this without having to hurt Papyrus. You’d never gotten into a proper encounter down here, always having someone to get you out of the situation with relative ease.

So, this was all nerve wracking to say the least.

The first few turns were rather bearable, you deciding that selecting the different options within the ACT column should be your first objective. You met the last option, it being the option to flirt with the tall skeleton. You bashfully pushed the button, and let out a flirty quip, causing Papyrus’ cheekbones to flare an orangish-pink. Sort of a salmon color. You let out a squeal, the flustered skeleton activating your inner soft side. He was such a sweetheart! You could never even think about hurting him.

The battle from then on had been rather uneventful, you and Papyrus deciding upon having a ‘date’ later. You both equally knew it wasn’t a real date, since you didn’t hold feelings for eachother like that. It was more of a play date, like something elementary schoolers would do to feel grown up. You found it rather sweet.

Finally, Papyrus had declared he was now going to use his blue attack! Thankfully, you knew Sans hadn’t lied about this one since he physically demonstrated it to you.

The thing is… He hadn’t fully demonstrated gravity magic to you, since your soul turned a pure indigo color and your entire body flopped to the ground. A bone flew your way, slapping you in the forehead.

“Owie… That hurt!” You yipped, rubbing the spot on your forehead that would most likely swell. “But, no matter! I will win this fight, Papyrus!” You yelled, your soul flashing a quick red. You were determined to spare this innocent monster, your ultimate objective to befriend his kind soul. “VERY WELL, FRIEND! THEN I WILL AMP UP MY SKILLS AS WELL!” You two quickly got into a rhythm of you defying 2-3 Gs, and Papyrus trying to avoid you slapping the SPARE button as hard as you could. 

Finally, Papyrus had gotten somewhat tired, but he put his hands on his hips and his cape flared in the non existent wind once again. “NOW! I SHALL USE MY SPECIAL ATTACK. ARE YOU READY?” He called, and you nodded your head eagerly. You were ready for anything this skeleton threw at you.

But… Sadly you weren’t ready for a huge bone coming your way.

It was  _ huge _ , and you jumped to maybe hope to somehow manipulate gravity to your will to avoid the literal clusters of bones coming your way. You felt a slight tug on your soul, and a familiar cyan color surrounded your soul, and guided you the way to success. You looked everywhere, trying to look for who it belonged to, but the fog was too thick for you to detect his location. 

After his ‘special attack’, Papyrus seemed to finally reached his peak of the fight, finally declaring that he was sparing you, even if it was not needed. You quickly slammed both of your fists on the button, and ran after the monster. Sure, you were tired as well, but the gravity that released from your soul made everything lighter. You jumped into his boney arms, and knocked him onto the ground. “I win!” You whooped, pumping a fist in the air in faux victory. You both had a good hearted laugh, since no one got badly hurt and you were both happy in the end.

“SO, WELL QUALIFIED FRIEND! SHALL WE GET ONTO OUR DATE?” You nodded eagerly, smile big on your face. You didn’t even care about your body crying for a break, you were too determined to make this tall skelly happy.

Little did you know that a certain short skeleton had been watching the whole fight. To say the least, he was happy to know you didn’t hurt his brother once. It had been truly a friendly spar, and anyone who treated his brother as well as you did was a relatively good person in his books.

Maybe not all humans are bad afterall.

  
  



	10. Celibacy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tensity is a bitch.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> originally this chapter was gonna have both dates but i decided against it... sorry!!  
> happy readin!  
> [tumblr](http://madjicks.tumblr.com)

****

You and Sans hadn’t spoke to eachother since your fallout.

It was rather tense in the skeleton household, the two of you too stubborn to put aside your differences and act like adults. You had no plans of apologizing to him, and apparently he didn’t to you either. Papyrus hadn’t been oblivious to it, but acted as if he was. You could tell in his little interactions with his brother that he knew more than he let on.

Yet, you were determined to make this date with Papyrus fun. You weren’t going to let his brothers actions ruin your day with the taller skeleton. Especially since Papyrus constantly brought you happiness in these dark times.

You let out a sigh, and cracked your knuckles. Papyrus had told you to meet him in the front of their house whenever it was convenient to you, so you decided to finally do some touring of the town since you’d had little to no interactions with it or the residents. It was rather standard, having a library, a bar, and a few houses littered here and there. There were civilians scattered about, but the only thing that really stood out to you was a christmas tree in the middle. On the surface, it was common to have up a pine for tradition, but you knew there was no concept of time down here. 

Another thing that caught your attention was the bright yellow monster hovering around it, his tail swishing up and down in what you could only assume was excitement. You took note he had no arms. “Hey, you!” He called, turning you around from your passing of the tree. You waved lightly and flashed a smile. “I haven’t seen you before! You’re not from Snowdin, are you?” You chuckled at his enthusiasm, and nodded your head. “No, I’m from the Ruins.” You answered, popping a hip and resting your hand on it.

His eyes seemed to sparkle, and you couldn’t help your smile growing wider. “Woah! Cool! No one ever comes from there. There’s rumors about that place though…” He mumbled the last part, and you could thankfully know from experience that there were no rumors to be spread. Sure, it was a little claustrophobic, but nothing too shabby. “It isn’t bad, I promise.” The child seemed to agree with you, and quickly skittered off to a nearby house, which you presumed was his own.

You couldn’t fight the overwhelming thoughts to travel into the library, your internal nerd crying for food. Before entering, you realized the sign read ‘LIBRARBY’ and you laughed as you entered. You quickly approached the woman behind the desk and introduced yourself as a traveler. She greeted you with a smile, and pointed you to the shelves of books lined up against the wall. You muttered a thanks, and made your way over to the fiction section.

Fiction was your favorite genre, since it gave you somewhat of an escape from real life. They had a variety of older books, ranging from The Secret Garden, to The Great Gatsby. You decided to grab one of your personal favorites, To Kill A Mockingbird, and settled down into one of the chairs. You were surprised by its relatively good condition, only having a few rips in the cover and some of the pages waterlogged.

You went up to the desk and consulted the lady once again, and she said there was no need for a library card. All of the books here are donated and you could take them for as long as you like. You were shocked by this, but accepted the rules gratefully and slid the book underneath your left arm. Waving her a goodbye, you guaranteed it would be back soon.

Your body was starting to get used to the cold of Snowdin, which was rather peculiar. You could only sum it up to magic in your mind. You decided to chat with some of the residents and asked for places to visit. A lot of them recommended Grillby’s, the trademark restaurant in the Underground. You thanked them for their chats and bid them goodbye. 

Time for a date!

Storing Grillby’s in the back of your mind for sometime later, you made your way to an igloo, it having a sign next to it. It read: ‘For when you want to get somewhere quick! Hop it and take a slip!’. You peaked into the snow seeing there was a rather large hole that seemed endless. Trusting the people that lived here, you slipped in, and it felt like a waterslide, but a lot colder. You were screaming in delight, letting woos and wees out every moment. Sadly, you met the end quicker than you’d like, and you were next to the skelebro’s shed once more.

Papyrus waved at you as you dusted off your clothing of excess snow from the tunnel system, and quickly replied with your own wave. “Hey, buddy! Where are we going for our sick date?” You asked, smile pretty big on your face.

“ONLY  _ THE  _ BEST OF PLACES IN SNOWDIN!” He snatched your hand, throwing you off balance temporarily. You scrambled back to standing once more, and had to jog to keep up with Papyrus’ breakneck pace. He stopped in front of the bar you’d checked out earlier, only to take a u-turn and take you back to his house. 

“MY HOUSE!” You let out a laugh and clapped your hands together. You both entered the house rather loudly, and this gave you more of a chance than before to examine your surroundings.

It was rather domestic, the walls lined with brick red and the floors blue and purple wiggly lines. There was a table to the right of the door, it holding a single rock on a plate, the surface of it coated in sprinkles. “AH, I SEE YOU’VE TAKEN INTEREST IN OUR PET ROCK! HE IS A GOOD ADDITION TO OUR FAMILY. HE LOVES SPRINKLES!” You let out a laugh once more, and patted the rock on it’s theoretical head. 

They had a big tube TV, something you’d used before to watch the news half mindedly with Sans this morning. That bummed you out, that was fun together. You wish he would just be nice already.

You shoved the thought of the older brother from your mind and shifted your focus to your current situation. There was a table next to the couch, it having a single thick book on the top of it. You brushed some dirt off the top of it, to reveal it had been a book about jokes. You summed this up to belonging to Sans and picked it up, always loving a good joke or two. Instead, you were met with another book that fell out of it.

This one was about quantum physics, which surprised you to say the least. You’d never have taken Sans for the sciency type, especially with something as challenging as physics, especially quantum. You were more of a chemistry type of guy, more biology than anything. So to find another science nerd, even if it was a different type, was rather exciting!

Now that you think about it, he did seem to be interested when you started talking about different elemental compounds of salt to change the colors of the fire on their stove, but that was basic chemistry. Nothing on the level of qp.

You were snapped out of your thoughts by a hand on your hip, causing you to jump and your cheeks to flare. “i know you’re dating my brother and all, but that doesn’t give you permission to go through my stuff.” The book was slipped out of your hands by another, and then he was gone. Did you just hallucinate? 

Whatever. You climbed up the stairs and looked around, noting that the blood that was dried on the doorknob was now cleaned off and shiny as ever. You noticed the large framed poster on the wall, it having a large bone on a purple background. It took up most of the wall, and reminded you of the picture frames in Toriel’s home.

You quickly pushed open what you could only assume was Papyrus’ door, and giggled as you heard him scamper up the stairs. “HALT! DO YOU WISH TO ENTER MY ROOM?”

Nodding your head, you were guided into his room, a light being flicked on to reveal his rather decorated room. He had a large rug placed on his floor, it being a royal purple and the edges being lined with flames. The tapestry was respectable, and the edges were tied into tassels. You bent down to feel it within your fingers, and it was a rather standard piece of carpet fiber.

You looked to your left to find a race car bed frame. It was rather well put together, and you were still wondering where Papyrus got all this super cool stuff from. It was hard to even find stuff like this on the surface, so you were clueless to where he got it down here. “Hey Papy.” You cooed, grinning with the nickname. His cheekbones warmed, and he fiddled with his gloves. “WHAT IS IT?” 

“Where’d you get this cool bed? Need me one of these someday.” You joked, jabbing your thumb in the direction of it. His eyes seemed to light up, happy for you to have taken interest in one of his favorite things. “MY BROTHER, SURPRISINGLY! HE MAY BE A LAZYBONES, BUT HE MADE ME A LOT OF THINGS. HE BUILT THE BOOKCASE OVER THERE, MY BED, AND EVEN MY ARMOR!” Your jaw plummeted to the floor, your eyes going wide with absolute shock.

Sans? You mean like,  _ the  _ Sans? You couldn’t believe it, and you let your eyes drift back to the bed once more. It was well crafted, the wood being literally melted together. How do you even do that?

Oh, yeah. Magic.

You internally groaned, and dragged a hand down your face out of Papyrus’ sight. You ran one of your hands over the rosewood, taking in all the details of the frame. God, what else were you gonna find out. First it was quantum physics, now its craftsmanship? He’s smart, funny, good with his hands, and loves his family?

God that’s… Pretty attractive.

You shoved that horrible thought out of your mind near instantly, and once again directed your attention to the situation at hand. Papyrus. Date. No thoughts about boning his brother while on a date with Papyrus.

Oh for fucks sake, even his puns were rubbing off on you. 

“WHAT ARE YOU BLUSHING FOR, HUMAN? HAVE MY CHARMS WARMED YOUR HEART ALREADY?” You were shocked by him referring to you as human, and apparently it showed on your face, because he let out a good hearted laugh.”WHAT, DID YOU THINK I HAVEN’T NOTICED? I HAVE SEEN A COUPLE HUMANS IN MY TIME DOWN HERE, MOST MONSTERS HAVE. BUT, OUR FIGHT HAS MADE ME SECOND GUESS CAPTURING YOU.” His eyes turned sad, and he rubbed his hands together, which is something he seemed to do when he was unsure. “Sans would always bring humans here that our father would meet. But, it all stopped a good time ago. He went missing while he studied methods to cool off the CORE. Sans never filled me in on the details, but I do wish he would. He seems to get really sad when I mention our father at all. He was closer with him than I ever was.” His somber tone was rather...Shocking, to say the least. You had only known Papyrus for two days, but from your interactions with him, you knew this wasn’t the norm. You walked up to the skeleton and wrapped your arms around his middle, trying to find a place to rest your hands on his spine without being uncomfortable.

“Thank you for telling me, Papyrus. I’m glad you trust me enough to tell me things like that.” You rubbed your eyes, not even sure why you suddenly felt so drained. “I, too, have had a family member disappear.” You failed to mention that they were your twin, since it wasn’t too important. You doubted you’d ever even meet her anyways. “So, I understand. Now, off with the somber stuff, how about we explore your room a bit more?” He seemed to nod eagerly at your request, and he guided you over to his desk. 

Your eyes practically shined at the amount of figures that were on his desk, and you almost squealed as you recognized one of them. “Jonathan!” You called, grabbing the figure off his table. “I didn’t know you liked Jojo! That’s one of my favorite anime!” You grinned, looking at the rather expensive figure in your hands. You looked in every nook and cranny, happy to find it was indeed authentic. “JO...JO? I’M SORRY TO SAY I HAVE NEVER HEARD OF THAT. BUT, FORGIVE ME IF I’M MISTAKEN, BUT DID YOU CALL THAT ANIME?”

Your eyes were still focused on the figure, but you had your ears trained in Papyrus’ direction. “Yeah! Ever heard of it?”

“I HAVE! MY BEST FRIEND’S FRIEND LOVES IT TO BITS. YOU TWO WOULD GET ALONG QUITE WELL!” He guaranteed, clapping his gloved hands together to produce a muffled sound. You were kind of excited to find out anime was known down here, even if you weren’t a huge weeb like some of your other friends, you could definitely appreciate it once in a while. You were more of a gaming person than anything, so you loved plots in them since it always sort of felt like you were there yourself.

You finally sat down the figure on his desk, and made your way over to his bookcase. It had a variety of novels, but you noticed one book peeking out from the rest.

_ Hide and Seek with Fluffy Bunny _ , you’d never heard the title before, so it was somewhat surprising to find. You had an extensive knowledge of literature, children’s books or not, so to find something you didn’t recognize was a shock.

You hummed as you flipped through the cardboard pages, taking in the soft watercolor imagery of the book. It read in a rhyme, and each page was equally as colorful as the previous. You read through quickly.

‘ _ Fluffy bunny hopped to and fro _

_ His little ears had a light flow _

_ Mother bunny searched for her kin _

_ Rubbing her paws on her white chin _

_ “Where could he be?” She asked so soft _

_ Fluffy Bunny giggled underneath his loft _

_ She sniffed and drug her nose past wood _

_ And found her bunny, just like she could. _ ’

You stared at the book rather fondly, its rhyme and colors bringing back good memories of your teen years. You’d had a similar book when you were younger, named The Runaway Bunny. Your brother loved it immensely when he was one. You smiled and put the book back, deciding on moving onto the next item of Papyrus’ room. He had an old Macintosh, you not having seen these since you were much younger. Your dad was an IT, so it was common for you to have old and broken computers littered around your house.

This computer had the aged casing, it tinted a yellow. You poked the screen and jumped when it turned on, and Papyrus quickly headed over to his computer. “AH, I SEE YOU’VE FOUND MY COMPUTER! GIVE ME JUST A MOMENT,” he said, sitting down in the chair in front of it. He opened up a tab that was labeled UNDERNET, which made you giggle slightly since there were old IRC servers you would hang out on named that.

“WHAT IS FUNNY, HUMAN?”

“Oh, when I was a bit newer to the internet, we had something called IRC, or, Internet Relay Chat. One of the servers I hung out on a lot was called Undernet, so to see it down here is kinda funny to me!” You said, bashfully smiling at going on the nostalgic mini rant. Papyrus seemed to not mind though, and when you looked over his shoulder, it looked like a fusion between wikia and Tumblr.

He seemed to get rather mad as he checked his ask box, and you tried to read through the dimmed screen. The backlights were old, so it wasn’t surprising in the least to find reading difficult.

Papyrus let out a groan and swung around in his swivel chair, crossing his arms and gritting his teeth. “THIS RUDE TROLL KEEPS COMING INTO MY INBOX AND HARASSING ME WITH CONSTANT PUNS. IT IS QUITE ANNOYING!” You had a feeling who said troll was, and when you recognized the typeface, it confirmed your suspicions. Deciding not to spill the beans, you closed the tab and pushed the computer’s off button. You knew he had good intentions, it was common sibling banter. You were guilty of it too.

You fiddled with your hands, and quickly alerted Papyrus you were done exploring and ready to start your date. To be fair, you were a bit nervous. Even if it wasn’t a true date, you still felt guilty for some reason. 

Papyrus said something about needing to change his outfit, so he shoved you out of his room and locked the door. You tried to distract yourself while you were outside his room for a bit longer than you would’ve liked, and soon you were met with falling since he flung open his door. He caught you and let out a satisfied breath. 

“ARE YOU ALRIGHT, HUMAN?” You nodded quickly and tried to tame the embarrassed flush that had made its way to your face, and pushed yourself off of the skeleton. You looked at his outfit, and let out a laugh you’d tried to keep in. 

Papyrus sure was...Unique, to say the least. This outfit he currently wore was nowhere near as eloquent as his previous one had been. He had basketballs for shoulder pads, a baseball cap turned backwards, some neon green mittens, daisy dukes that somehow were even higher than his normal ones, and a crop top to, hehe,  _ top _ it all off. You remembered to save that to tell Sans later. I mean, if there was a later. You didn’t even know if you guys would make up after your tussle. 

The skeleton in front of you materialized a book from nowhere, it labeled  _ Dating for Mad Dummies _ , and you were rather caught off guard. You figured it was a monster parody of the for dummies books up on the surface. 

He seemed intent on following the manual to its fullest, which made the date a bit more boring than you would’ve liked. He read common ideas, like giving a present and having food and what not, but it was boring. You had hoped monster dates weren’t as boring as human ones, but it seemed that was not the case. You enjoyed his enthusiasm though, and it did help in the grueling activity you two were currently participating in.

You threw in a few flirty puns and pick up lines that you’d learned over the years, causing him to groan but still hide his little ‘nyeh heh heh’’s that you were lucky enough to pick up on. It seemed he liked puns, but kept it under a facade of not liking them to appear more professional.

Sadly, the date ended quicker than you would’ve liked, since you two had put more of a spin on it. You were ushered out of the home into the yard, and the door was slammed on you. Had it been anyone else, you’d have misunderstood, but with Papyrus, you knew he meant well.

You took this as your opportunity to finally move on from Snowdin, so you made your way to where you and Papyrus fought just hours before. The fog had still been rather thick, but eventually, it disappeared along with the snow. 

Now on blue soil, you looked on to the place named Waterfall. Time to get going.


	11. Confession

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Taking in the view.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> as much as i joke about hating this chapter, i actually really enjoy it. probably because i just really love sans hiuhihbjhbjhbjhh  
> casual reminder comments keep me alive (literally), so please don’t be afraid to send some! happy reading!  
> [tumblr](http://madjicks.tumblr.com)

You had never seen soil as peculiar as the one you currently stood on. It had a blue hue, and it was rather moist, but not muddy. It was also rather cool, and, once again, you could only simply sum it up to magic. You trailed along the smooth ground, taking in the scene around you. There was a river with large blocks of ice floating through it every so often, causing you to wonder where it all ended up.

  
Now you had entered the cave, and were still rather surprised by the area’s blue tones. It was beautiful, and anyone in their right mind would easily agree. Without realizing it, you’d made your way to a section of the cave, it having the same dinosaur monster from earlier and another monster, who you couldn’t really come up with a simile for. They were orange and had a neon blue shirt. You took notice of the station near you, and the sleeping skeleton with his head and arms resting on top of it. You smiled softly, and made your way over.

  
You rubbed your hand over the top of his skull, surprised by how soft and overall smooth it was. You’d expected it to be dry and rough like a human skeleton, but he was no realistic skelly. “Sansy…” You murmured, softly shaking his shoulder now. He stirred out of his sleep, and his eyelights made eye contact with you. “oh, hey.” He mumbled groggily, stretching out his body and sitting back in a normal position. “how did it go?”

  
“Pretty well. Pap quite literally shoved me out of the house. Guess he was bone tired of me lazing there, huh?” Sans let out a snort at your not so subtle pun, and slipped his hands into his pockets. “yeah, that’s my bro for ya.” He seemed to brighten at the mention of his brother, and your facial expression softened even more to see how much he loved him.

  
“Hey…” You started, tapping your fingers absentmindedly against the wood while you thought of what you should say. “I’m sorry for snappin’ at ya earlier.” You mumbled, your head turned away from him due to you just not being able to make proper eye contact. “no need for apologies, you weren’t in the wrong.” He frowned, and quickly apologized for his actions. You were glad to finally have moved past that tense spot.

  
“Anyways… When’s your next break? I was thinking about checkin’ out that bar back home.” You jammed your thumb in the direction of Snowdin, eyes closing casually. Damn, a nap sounded splendid right now. “now you’re speakin’ my language.” Sans grinned, pushing himself off his stool and walking to your side. “Is it now?” You asked, and he nodded his head with a good hearted laugh.

  
He held out his hand to you, and you bristled with confusion. “You want to hold hands?” He laughed in response. “if you wanna teleport like you did your first time getting here, you’ll have to have a good contact with me.” You let out a embarassed noise in response, and grabbed his hand a little more forcefully than you could’ve, and were quickly transported to an all dark area.

  
In front of Sans was a screen, it having a 16-bit map laid out on top of it, causing you to blink in confusion. “What’s that?”

  
“have you ever played video games before?” You nodded your head. “think of it like fast traveling, but in real life. and… a bit of nausea to boot.” He grabbed your hand quickly and slapped his other on a certain part of the screen, causing the two of you to literally rip through reality itself and appear in front of the bar you’d seen earlier.

  
You fell to the ground, clutching your head from the all too sudden pain that flooded it. Sans seemed to really not care about your physical state, too enamoured in entering the building. You forced yourself off of the ground in a hurry, trying your best to ignore the thumping in your skull. “Wait up!” You called, pushing open the door and being slapped in the face with heat.

  
The place was beautiful, having a cheery and warm atmosphere. The overall tone was brown and orange, Snowdin residents providing the only stand outish color. There were many dogs gathered around a big table, playing Poker among themselves. It was so odd to see so many anthropomorphic animals gathered down here, and you had the sick thought of the furries on the surface being elated if they ever found out.

  
You finally made your way to the counter, a fire elemental behind it, rubbing a white cloth along a glass. You were definitely confused by the action, since fire usually caused cloth to light ablaze. You sat in a stool next to Sans, and tried to adjust yourself to make you less uncomfortable. The seats weren’t terrible, but they weren’t the best either.

  
The fire elemental decided to finally take note of your presence, and you shyly smiled. “Do you guys have a menu here?” They shook their head, and guided your eyes to the menu above their flame. It had simple things on it; burgers, milkshakes, fries, typical diner food. You were thankful for the simple comforts that food like that brang to your mind. “the burgs here are pretty grate, but the fries just aren’t heatable.” You let out a snort at the somewhat subtle puns, and grinned at the skeleton. Turning your attention to the man (?) behind the counter, you asked for a basket of fries, and they quickly made their way to the fire exit. How fitting.

  
“that’s grillbz, or, less casually, grillby. he owns the place.” You nodded at the new information, and fiddled with your hands as you waited for him to bring your fries. You were rather excited, to be fair, since fries were one of your favorite things to munch on. “why the long face?”

  
Sans had his head placed against his right hand, staring at you rather blankly. His expressions were always rather hard to read, so you were lost as to what he was thinking by asking you such an open ended question. “I miss home.” You frowned, surprised you could so easily admit something that’s been eating at you this whole time. “whaddya mean? ‘s right around the corner.” You let out a sad laugh at his joke, but looked away.

  
“No, I mean.” You paused, and cleared your throat. You nodded towards Grillby, who had just made his way back through the door. He placed two ketchup bottles in front of both of you, accompanied by two baskets of fries. “Thanks.”

  
“how ‘bout just this once we take it to a booth?” Sans asked, permanent smile somewhat strained. You nodded and grabbed your food. “sorry, grillbz. special occasion, y’know?” He grinned, and Grillby seemed to crackle in response.

  
You sat down in a booth near the wall, it somewhat away from a jukebox and a horse monster who seemed to be trying to fix it. You mindlessly picked at your fries, desperately wanting to eat, but unable to muster up the ability to. “Up there, I mean. I miss my cat… My bro, other things.” You neglected to mention your boyfriend, because even though you should miss him, for some odd reason, you just didn’t. “hey, don’t sweat it. i know what being homesick is like.” His eyelights had somewhat of a faraway look in them, like he was staring right through you.

  
“Sorry to dampen the mood. I didn’t intend for it to be this way.” You grimaced, looking at the wall instead of keeping eye contact like you should. “well, maybe you should ketchup with your journey, maybe mustard up some courage, huh?” He had a shit eating grin on his face, and your face lightened a bit with a smile.

  
“You love this place because its pun material, don’t you?” You smiled, wrapping your fingers around the ketchup bottle. Eating seemed like a good idea since you hadn’t done so in a bit. Your body was craving food, and you were gonna give it its desires. “maybe.” He laughed, picking a fry out of the pile and popping it into his mouth. You watched with interest has his teeth separated and the food flew into his mouth. “That reminds me.”

  
“what?”

  
“How do you guys eat? Skeletons, I mean.” You were someone who loved learning new things, especially about things that weren’t about humans. “magic.” He said with a wriggle of his fingers, and you deadpanned. “Yeah, yeah, smart guy. You gotta know how right? Gimme the specifics.”  
“you gotta reach level 5 friendship status before ya get that info, human.”

  
“Well, monster,” You strained, your fingers gripping the edge of the table a bit roughly, “what level am I at now?”

  
“1.” You frowned, suddenly restraining yourself from being so playful like a friend would. “but down here that’s a good thing. proud of ya.” He smiled, poking at your hand that you had laid out on the table. You mindlessly stared at his hand as you hummed a song that you were fond of. “what’re you humming?” He asked fondly, now rubbing circles on your dorsal. You let out a flustered chuckle, and retrieved your hand from his touch. “A song that I like.” You replied curtly, trying your best to fight the urge to put your hand back. His fingers were smooth, and they felt nice on your skin.

  
You were blushing without even realizing it, and now that you looked at the setting, this all kind of felt like a date. Your face heated even more, and you squirmed on your side of the booth. Before you could react, someone had slid into said side. An arm wrapped around your middle, and a skull snuggled into your ribs. Your face was practically radiating heat now, and you awkwardly set your arm on Sans’ shoulders. “you got this, cherry.” He mumbled through your clothing. The nickname struck another one of your heartstrings. “oh, sorry. did i hurt you?”

  
“A-Ah, no… It’s nothing, sorry.” Him leaving your side was rather saddening, but you were too distracted thinking about the nickname. That was your twin sister’s name, and you hadn’t seen her in a decade. You wondered how she was doing.

  
“hey, let’s head out of here. i can show you somewhere cool.” He extended a hand, and you took it without a second thought. Sans yelled at Grillby something about a tab, and then you were jerked into the void once more.

  
This time, Sans had a different layout in front of him. It looked like the place you’d entered previously, except a lot less detailed. This place seemed a lot bigger than Snowdin, and you stared at it in awe. “cool, huh? maybe i can teach ya how to someday.” He joked with a jab to your ribs. You let out a huff, and folded your arms, still side glancing the neon blue and indigo screen. He forced your hands out of their cradle of arms and latched on, transporting you to a room.

  
There was neon blue water everywhere, and you gaped in awe. The lighting of the room was simply from bioluminescence, and you couldn’t help but wonder what it was coming from. Maybe a plankton or algae of some sort? You remembered researching certain species of bacteria and creatures that lit up various areas of seawater, but never to this extent.

  
You ran to the water banks, and quickly dipped your hand into them. Probably not the best idea, but it was your impulse control out of whack by seeing such a cool sight. It felt like normal water, except it left your fingers with a long lasting cool feeling. It was like chewing mint gum and then taking a breath of fresh air, super cold but pleasurable. You let out an excited giggle, and jumped as you heard a thump next to you. Seeing white fur, you already knew who it was. “thankfully, we don’t have to worry about undyne out here. she knows i patrol here, so she has no need to.” He let out a pained laugh. “may be a lazybones, but i do my jobs right.”

  
You stared at him and marveled at the way the lighting shone off his bones. It was beautiful, like seeing moonstone actually illuminated by moonlight. Since the water was properly blue, it tinted his skull blue too.

  
It seemed to illuminate largely on his cheekbones, which caused you to furrow your eyebrows in confusion. “Are you b–”  
“hey look, telescope.” He huffed out anxiously, interrupting your question. It somewhat confirmed your suspicions, and you giggled facetiously. There was indeed a telescope, but you doubted you could see stars down here. He guided you to the front of it, and you decided to trust his recommendation.

  
You looked into it, and gasped as you saw the various crystals coating the ceiling. They all had a blue shimmer to them, almost glowing with the amount of it. It was beautiful, and you could have sworn something wet was around your eye.

  
You pulled back and wiped your right eye, only to find your hand coated in pink paint. “Oh, goddammit, Sans!” You cried, desperately trying to rub the paint off. Sans was chuckling as he reached into a box nearby, a newfound dark blue cloth in hand. “here, lemme help.” He wiped your eye carefully as he held the back of your head, and if not for your playful irritation, you would probably see this as an affectionate gesture.

  
You burst into a fit of giggles, and playfully pushed the skeleton away from you. “You dork!” You were genuinely laughing at his antics, and rolled back onto the dirt. “Jeez… You got me good.” Suddenly smiling way too wide to be innocent, you faced the skeleton with a grin. “Guess you could say I had pink eye, huh?” Sans laughed at your pun, and seemed for once to not have a fake smile. It was one thing you could pick out from his facial expressions, he hid them well.

  
Tapping your chin with your finger, you crossed your arms in concentration. “Hey, wanna play a game?”

  
“sure, whatcha got in mind?”

  
“It’s pretty simple really. It’s a game to help us get to know each other. I know loads of stuff about your awesome bro,” His eyes sparkled at your reference. “But, I don’t know much about you! We’re probably more in common than you think.”

  
“sure, red.” He laughed, and you laughed in return. You had guessed he was joking about your hair color, but he was actually joking about your aura. It had a red sheen to it, something he could only guess meant you were determined to wriggle some information out of his tight trap of a skull.

  
“Sweet! You can go first if you’d like.” You smiled warmly at him, ready to supply the answer to any question he asked. He seemed to think for a moment, before the idea swam its way to his mind. “don’t kick me for this, but how old are you?”

  
You laughed at his phrasing before responding. “19! I’ll turn 20 in a few months though, how about you?”

  
“26.”

  
“Older guy, I like it!” You whooped, and missed Sans somewhat blushing at your unintended compliment. In monster years, he was about 326, but it roughly translated to 26 in human years. He pocketed his hands, and stared at you. You tapped your chin once more, trying to come up with a good question to ask. “Hmm… Oh! Have you ever met a human before me?” You made sure to specify, because you knew his smartass would reply with something along the lines of you being here. “yeah, did some experiments with the doc.” His eyes closed in thought, trying to reminisce the times with his pop, trying to figure out various ways to shatter the barrier. The old geezer decided doing a swan dive into the CORE was a better idea, though, so Sans couldn’t help but feel bitter at the thought of him.

  
“Who’s the doc?” He tutted at you. “you already asked your question. my turn, now.” You huffed, even though you knew he was right. He pondered a bit more, not even really sure what to ask. He could possibly ask more about your past, but he couldn’t guarantee that you wouldn’t lie. You hadn’t lied since the incident, but it was still thin ice, something Sans would feel better not treading on. “this is a follow up question, but, uh, you’re in college, right?” You nodded, shoving your hands underneath your thighs.

“what’s your major? at least, i think that’s what they’re called. our encyclopedias have low amounts of info, not even bothering to mention how outdated they are as a whole.”  
“Marine Biology. My minor is auto mechanics.” He raised a brow bone at your new terms, and you let out a well mannered laugh. “They’re rather uncommon, so it’s not too shocking to find out you don’t know about them.” That came out a bit more insensitive than you would’ve liked, but it was already said and done. “Marine Biology is the study of sealife and their environment. It’s been one of my passions since I was younger.” You smiled as you remembered the necklace you had wrapped around your neck.

  
You pulled it out of your turtleneck, and showed it off in the light surrounding the two of you. “It used to have a mood ring section in it, but it fell off halfway through my sophomore year of high school. One of my best friends, MJ, gave me this.” You smiled fondly at the simple piece of jewelry. “I love dolphins a lot, and she got this for me. I remember being really excited.” You closed your eyes, and thought of ways to explain your minor, especially since Sans seemed to be closely listening.

  
“Auto Mechanics is a pretty broad term. I fix up and paint cars, mainly. And, by paint, I mean airbrushing them. I can make some pretty wicked designs on cars. It’s super great when I need some money on the side.” You folded your hands in your lap, staring at the skeleton who seemed to be doing the same to you.  
He let out a chortle, and scratched the back of his vertebrae. “you humans are weird.”

  
“What do you mean we’re weird? You have a quantum physics book hidden in a joke book, I could never wrap my head around that stuff!” He grinned at you. “you just are, also, nice waste of a question. seems it’s my turn again.” He thought for a few more moments.

  
“why are you down here?” And there it is, the question you were dreading him asking from the very beginning. You gnawed at your lips, and lowered your head. “I…” In front of you in an instant, he put his hand on yours, and looked at you encouragingly.

  
“I tried to kill myself.”


	12. Tragedy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hate when that happens.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is very special to me. it handles topics like paralyzation and child death, so beware.
> 
> [tumblr](http://madjicks.tumblr.com)

The way Sans visibly tensed as you spit out those horrible words only made you feel endlessly worse. Your eyes turned dark and your facial expression overcast, with your left hand holding your right arm. “Yeah, I know, it was stupid. I kind of wish the Underground didn’t exist so I would’ve succeeded.” You paused, eyes widening. “Only sometimes, though.” Your wording was harsh, but it was the truth, whether you liked it or not. Daring to look up, chills ran down your spine as you saw Sans’ eyelights had vanished. “why?” He asked, his voice seeming… shaken? You didn’t think it mattered that much.

“It doesn’t matter, I’m down here now.” You mumbled, and squeaked as you felt hands clamp onto your shoulders. “that’s not what i asked. specifics.” He growled, and you shrunk under his eyeless glare. 

“Depression, paranoia, hallucinations. I’m still not thoroughly convinced this isn’t all an illusion or some weird afterlife slash dream.” His eyelights reappeared, and you relaxed a lot more than you thought. You took note of his hands clamped around your shoulders still, them getting tighter with every passing moment. “Look, JP.” You stared at him in shock, his new tone taking you by surprise. “You’re right. We’re, uh, more in common than I’d like to admit.”

He took his hands away, and you rubbed your shoulders. “i’ve...i’ve never admitted this to anyone, at least, they don’t remember it.” You looked at him to encourage him to go on. “you know how in a game, when you die, you reset? and then no one remembers, right?” You nodded. “there’s a kid i know, their name’s frisk. i don’t know how they do it, but i’ve been reliving everything for hundreds of times. i already had really bad issues before they decided to come around and… i’ve tried to die before too. just wanted an escape, yknow?” He frowned. “it’s hard, trying to find a reason to live down here. especially with a genocidal maniac running around and then resetting everything like they’re above the consequences.”

“i’ve seen my brother’s pile of dust more times than i can count. it’s horrible.” His frown deepened, and you felt sympathy. Normally, you would have pitched in your own experiences to help validate him, but you felt he needed to get this out. He looked scared even telling you this information. “that’s why you’re so… special. you’re new, you’re completely different. i’ve been going through this all so blindly like i did the first timeline. it’s so nice to have new dialogue and not to recite the same things over and over.” He closed his eyes, his smile actually falling into a grimace.

“i’m really tired. honestly, i’m awaiting the day that kid comes around and ruins all of this.” He waved his hands around the room, almost to gesture the actions he was just begging to come already. “what i wanted to say, really, is that you’re like an angel in my eyes. it’s nice to have someone who i can relate to, talk about, share some jokes with, and someone who appreciates my brother  _ without _ the motivation to kill in the next time jump.” 

Sans finally made eye contact with you, only to slightly start when he saw the tears gathered in your eyes. “hey, hey, don’t cry! i’m sorry.” He tried to sooth you, before you surprised him with a big smile. “I’m so proud of you.” You said brokenly, trying to put as much emotion into that simple sentence alone. “You’ve been through so much… Yet, you have the idea of me being an angel… I’m just a broken soul awaiting my time to leave this rock.” You grinned sadly, crying more into the heels of your hands. 

“I know what it’s like to lose a brother.” You said all too suddenly, rubbing your eyes raw with your scratchy sweater sleeves. “I lost mine back in 2009. He died of pneumonia after years of trying to keep him alive.”

You smiled sadly, reminiscing him in his jungle bed. Everyone in your family had so much hope for the little guy, only for him to slowly turn yellow in your mother’s arms. Something in you broke that day, and you still haven’t properly recovered from the event. “His name was Prescott. I miss him so much.” Sans seemed to grin madly, and you stared at him with soggy eyes. “wait, wait, wait, you said  _ prescott _ ?” You nodded hesitantly, somewhat put off by his enthusiasm.

He grabbed your hand and you were teleported into the void for the third time today, and he swiped through screens much too quickly for your comfort. He finally landed on one with a huge garden of flowers. He snatched your hand once more, and you vanished to said area.

There lay a ghost, one who had the slightest tint of green to their figure. They wore a yellow flower on the right side of their figurative forehead, and had large blushy cheeks. “hey, pres.” The ghost perked up, and flipped around from their activity to stare at their two new guests. “Oh, hi Sans.” They smiled, eyes closed in delight. Their nubs held out for a hug, and they awkwardly hugged his short form. “Who’s this with you?”

You were frozen, brain immediately recognizing that voice. You felt your knees wobble, eyes flooding with tears. Letting out a strangled noise, you shakingly held out your arms to the form. “Guin…” You mumbled, using the old nickname that only you used for him. His eyes widened in shock, and he stared at you. “Sissy?” He asked, and flew into your arms. You cried into him, rambling on about how much you missed him. “Baby…” You cried, holding him tighter than you ever had. Even if hugging a ghost was a tad odd, you made it work.

“I never thought I’d see you again! I’m so happy.” He smiled, breaking away from your hug. You didn’t want to let go. As you saw his figure once more, the tears burst through again, you now smiling, filled to the brim with joy. “As I am to you.” Grinning, you held his nub once more, and just stared at his figure.

He really  _ was _ cute, and you were happy that spirits could encapture even that within him. “You’ve… You’ve advanced so much mentally. I never even thought you would ever be able to talk.” He let out a laugh at your remark, and quickly shook his head. “Yeah, me neither. But, the day I died, I remember just waking up here and being confused. It was weird not having a G-Tube in my stomach. I still have a little scar though.” He gestured to the small nic on his figurative torso, and you laughed.

You picked him up, and held him in your arms like a new teddy bear. Sans looked so smug, his grin genuine once more. You ran over and grabbed him with your free arm, and clamped them around the two.

“You two are like the family I always wanted.” Your eyes had dried by this point, but you were still mentally crying with bliss. “Sans, I…”

“don’t mention it. i’m glad i could give you your bro back.” Staring at him with a watery smile, you tightened the hug, and let go. “Hey, little bro. Wanna go somewhere cool?” He nodded eagerly, and you snickered at his childish nature still being present. “Sans.” You motioned, and he got what you meant.

He grabbed your hand, and you held your arm tight around Guin. You were transported to the void once more, and you swore your lip split from how happy you were at the ghost’s reaction. “Woah, what is this place?!” 

“the void, simply put. i’d say we could explore but there’s not much to really look at.” He chuckled. “it’s just kilometers of black.” He flipped through his screens once more, and quickly transported the two of you back to his sentry station at the entrance to Waterfall. “alright, here we are.”

You thanked him before remembering something you’d meant to ask about earlier. “Hey,” you murmured, tightening your grip around the ghost in your arms. “You said something about Undyne, right? What’s up with her?”

“she’s the human hunter down here. apart of the royal guard my bro wants to join so bad.” Your anxiety flew through the roof, and Sans laughed at your reaction. “i’m sure you’ll be fine. i hope.” His last comment made your anxiety pool even more, and even though you hated it, you were a bit more scared than you’d hoped.

“W-Well,” you said through trembling lips, “guess I gotta get going.” You were about to dart, before you felt a bony hand on yours. “don’t sweat it, bud. you’ll be fine. call paps if it gets really dangerous.” You frowned at the last part. “I’ll uh. I’ll try.” You quickly ran out of the room before he could stop you anymore, and you kept Guin in your arms. “I’ve been down here for 8 years, I can tell you a bit more about Undyne if you’d like.” Absentmindedly nodding, you let your mind slip away as the child in your arms babbled on about the residents of Waterfall. You just kept running, through water, through dirt, through grass, you just wanted out of this soggy place.

The sights were breathtaking, but you had no time to do sightseeing, as much as you would have liked to. All you could really do was keep up a good pace through this area, and try to push the possible monster attacks far from your conscious.

Guin kept babbling all he could, and it definitely helped you keep a bit more stable than you would’ve liked. Having someone, even family, to just chatter in your ears kept you more focused. Your feet were soggy, your hair was wet, everything apart of you was damp in some way possible. It made you feel gross, and the desperate craving for a shower was rather visible in your mind.

Finally reaching a bridge, you stared at the bottom. Your eyes were wide with fear, even if Guin was trying to reassure you that it was a safe fall. Before you could even consider running back to Snowdin into welcome arms, you heard a very loud crash behind you, and your feet slipped on the surface. 

You didn’t scream. You didn’t cry. You laid there, simply letting gravity take action in this situation. That was all you really  _ could _ do. Guin was trying desperately to snap you out of your daze, but all you could do was stare at the endless dark above you. Where was everyone? Where were you? All you could smell were golden flowers, and it made your stomach turn. 

Why isn’t your body moving?

You tried to move, but your body was fighting you. You felt no pain. You could move your arms, you could move your head, but your legs wouldn’t move.

All you could truly hear was a fuzzy screaming of someone, like you were in a hospital while having a seizure. You couldn’t see, your vision an absolute mess. Oh, your glasses were gone. That made sense. You squinted at the figure trying to move your body, but they had failed every attempt. It sounded like they were crying. Why were they crying? Did you hurt them? Are they hurt? Are you someone scary?   
No. You’re JP. You’re 19, you’re in the Underground. Your best friend’s name is Lilly. Your… Your… Your what? There was something missing, you knew it.

You can’t remember much, but all you know is that something is wrong. The ghost thing was now crying desperately into what you could only guess was a flip phone, repeating your name over and over again. Why? Did something bad happen?

You still couldn’t feel or move your legs.

You felt something smooth on your temple, and tried to see the person stroking it. “come on.” They mumbled, and you closed your eyes.

What happened?


	13. Rising Tide

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Let's just put it out there that you're not very fond of loud noises.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i REALLY love this chapter, it touches on a lot of things that are personal to me and make me really happy overall. happy reading!  
> [tumblr](http://madjicks.tumblr.com)

_ “what the fuck is wrong with you?!” _

_ “Look, shorty, I was doing my job. Just cuz you’re overly obsessed with some ordinary human isn’t my problem.” _

_ “that doesn’t mean you should cripple her! that’s worse than death and you fucking know it.” _

_ “Watch the words, Sans, wouldn’t want your precious little brother to hear it, would you?” _

_ A smack emanated from the room, causing Papyrus to wince at his brother’s harsh actions towards his best friend. “Listen here, fish bitch, don’t ever lay your hands on her ever again, or I’ll make sure your fins are my next meal.” Papyrus could hear the anger in his brother’s voice, something he’d rarely heard in his entire life. What was so special about you anyways? He’d never treated other humans like this, so why were you different? _

_ “WHY DO YOU EVEN CARE ABOUT HER ANYWAYS, ASSHOLE?!” _

_ “Because she’s my s-” He cut off so abruptly, it could resemble a train suddenly slamming on its breaks. His eyelights had disappeared, and his drastic actions vanished with them. “Really, Sans?” Undyne’s tone had significantly lost its edge, and Papyrus could hear Sans shuffling his house slippers along the kitchen floor. “it doesn’t matter.” He echoed your words from earlier, even if he was disappointed in you dismissing yourself so quickly. He was a hypocrite, he knew. _

_ “She’s a human. You know that she’s our seventh soul to get out of this place, I was just doing my job.” Her eye closed premeditatedly, and she folded her arms. “I get it. I do. I wouldn’t want anything to happen to Alphy, but I can’t prevent this. We’re so close to freedom, I can’t just let it slip through my fingers like that, and you know it.” Sans had a dark look on his skull, his smile long faded away. He stared down at the floor, trying to consider his options and digging through his memory for past timelines. Frisk had the proper Determination to break through the Barrier, so if a kid could do it, couldn’t you? _

_ “maybe there’s a way to be free without any murder.”  _

 

You jerked awake rather violently, only to realize you could barely move at all. Looking around your surroundings, you found you were in Papyrus’ bed, and you frowned. What happened to Waterfall? Staring at the carpet, you flung your arms out beside you, and tried to push yourself up. You succeeded, but when you tried to walk… 

Nothing happened.

Staring at your limbs with confusion, you tried to move your calves once more. Nothing happened. Were they numb or something? You gave one final kick, before giving up. Even if you couldn’t move your lower legs, you could still move your body, and that’s really all you could ask for in this shitty situation. All your limbs were sore, especially your lower back, and you let out a pained groan. Before you could even think about your next plan of action, there was a polite knock on the door, and you told the person to come in.

Papyrus had shut the door, gently, behind him, and gave you a knowing smile. His whole demeanor was off, him being much more kind and less brash than you were used to. “Human, are you alright?” You distantly nodded, still trying to figure out your current predicament. Alright, you’re in Snowdin. Wait, where’s Guin? Did you dream all of that?

“Where’s…” You drifted off, hand being placed to your mouth in hesitation. “Where’s what?” Papyrus asked, his hands wrung together in front of a more casual shirt. You shook your head, you dismissing yourself much too quickly than you would’ve liked. “Ah, it’s nothing. Sorry, Pap.” You near whispered, rubbing your thumbs into your palms. “What happened?” Your question had importance, and you figured if anyone, Papyrus could deliver the news much more pleasantly than anyone else. 

“I don’t know much about humans myself, but your brother explained what happened. Apparently, one of Undyne’s spears clipped your lower back, and it snagged one of your vertebrae, which caused many of the nerve endings channeling to your legs to stop functioning, along with the tendons in them tearing from your fall. I’m afraid to say there’s… little to no chance of you walking ever again.” You stared at the skeleton with wide eyes, one of your worst fears coming to reality. Your legs were your life, and to lose them so  _ quickly _ only made you feel angry. 

You closed your eyes, and clenched your hands around each other. “Alright.” You said rather clipped, coldly glaring at the edge of the bed where your useless limbs were. Papyrus could clearly sense how tense you were, and he dismissed himself.

Now you really  _ were _ a freak, huh? Your legs didn’t work, you had mangled arms and thighs, an ugly scar across your face, what else, a missing eye?

You were brooding, for sure. Disgust flooded your mind, self loathing near drowning you in pain. You wanted to die. You were useless as is, and it wasn’t like you could continue going through the Underground in this condition. Everything was futile, and you wanted to die because of it.

You didn’t notice the multiple eyes staring at you through the door crack, more like an eye and two pin pricks.

“Go talk to her.”

“why? she’ll probably think i did it.”

Undyne glared at the shorter skeleton with knowing anger, and he let out a sarcastic laugh. “It doesn’t matter, if she’s what you say she is, she’ll take comfort in even your presence alone.” He let out a sigh, gritting his teeth at her words of truth. He hated this almost as much as you did, and he honestly just wished the kid would come down and reset so he could get back into his routine.

But, that was wrong. He needed you.

He pushed through the door to find you having a borderline panic attack, something he knew all too well. You were sobbing into your hands, mumbling something about being a failure over and over. His whole stance softened, and he wanted to approach you, but decided against it. It seemed you needed some space at the moment.

“I’m a fucking failure. I should’ve never b-been fucking born.” You sobbed, drenching your hands in tears. What was the point? You should’ve died already, why were you still alive? “I just want to fucking die…” You choked out, rubbing viciously at your eyes. Anger was still present within you, but it was masked by downright depression. Your mental state was in shambles since you were chemically unbalanced due to the lack of medicine in your system. Pain just added to it all, making you desperately crave death.

“I’ve tried everything. Hanging myself, jumping into a mountain, cutting my wrists, drugging myself, nothing works.” You growled, suddenly feeling overpowered by repressed anger. You flung your hands against your thighs, hitting them hard with your fists. “What do you want from me, world?! I’ve given you everything, from my soul to my fucking body, what else could you fucking want?!” 

“maybe the world doesn’t want you, but it doesn’t mean you should give up.” You jerked away from your mental breakdown, staring at the skeleton in horror. “Did… Did you see that? How much did you see? Do you hate me? Did you do t-” His hard stare stopped you from your endless ramble of interrogation. “hush.” He placed a finger to his mouth, and hopped up on the bed beside you.

“what papyrus told you is true. you’re paralyzed.” He gazed at your chest to see your soul on the edge of literally  _ shattering _ , and his hands clenched in his pockets. “but, don’t worry about it. i’m friends with a biomechanics scientist, she can make you functional prosthetics.” He wasn’t sure of that, since Alphys didn’t know much of you other than silent camera footage and his babbles, but it could help to calm you down. Sans wasn’t good at soothing people, but you were special.

Your eyes were cold, and you gazed at the ground with sadness. What if he was lying like everyone else did to you? He could just be saying that to make you feel better. I mean, everyone leaves at some point, right? You felt like a patient in the psychiatric hospital again, being treated like some sort of crazy child. Crazy wasn’t a good descriptor of you, right? 

Shedding your last bits of tears, you stared at the skeleton next to you. He held himself… Not at all. He was slumped, his face was sad. and he looked almost apologetic. For what, though? There was nothing he did, or could do.

“you’re lucky to have such an awesome brother. he immediately called pap, and i rushed there without even thinking about it.” His cheekbones tinted a slight blue, unnoticeable to your watery eyes. “can i do something real quick?” He asked, and you shrugged your shoulders with no energy to the gesture, causing his frown to deepen. “are you sure?”

“Just do it.” You snapped, and then looked away, hands still in between your limp legs that hung over the edge of the bed. He stood in front of you, and he placed his left hand on your chest. You were too exhausted to even care. He could molest you, and you wouldn’t even fight back, that’s how much you’ve just given up. 

Apparently, he’d done something called soul tracing, which was more of a joke in his eyes than a technical term. You’d seen your soul enough to know how ugly it was, so you didn’t even bother to care about looking at it.

He held his hands softly below it, taking in its dim light. You heard an unknown whisper come from the door, and you looked up to it. There was a blue skinned woman, an eyepatch over her left eye. She had bright red hair, and yellow tinted eyes. Her teeth were jagged and yellowed, and big fins sprouted from the sides of her head. She wore a tank top and skinny jeans, along with red boots. “Did I do that?”

“no, it’s been like this since i met her.” Sans spoke so softly, you would have blushed if you weren’t so mentally absent. “that’s why i’m desperate to protect her. she’s too fragile.” He said so quietly, you barely even heard him. You perked up slightly, staring at him now. “I’m no damsel.” You murmured, before returning to your state of mixed emotions. Sure, having extra help in an unknown place was great and all, but you were always independent. You weren’t weak.

“Who are you?” Your voice was so devoid of any emotion, you’d swear it was the sound bit for Siri’s beta stages. The fish woman stared at you, trying not to grid her teeth at your born species. “Undyne. Head of the Royal Guard, learn it, live it.” You heard a sharp clunk and a hiss of pain, and slightly laughed at the shenanigans unfolding in front of you. “Listen here, one hp! I recommend you don’t keep hitting me like that before I hit you back!” Sans let out a hearty chuckle, and you let out a content sigh. Friendship, huh? You missed your friends. 

“So… Rumor has it, you paralyzed me. I’m one to not believe with ease, so just fess up, please.” Your demand was softer than you intended, but you tried to hold an authoritative tone in your voice. “Yeah, I did! What’re you gonna do about it?”

Her eye was wide in front of you, teeth dragged into a smug grin. You stared blankly at her, and let your chin fall into your hands. “Nothing. I can’t walk.” You lamely joked, a pained laugh escaping your dry lips. Her expression significantly dropped, and you watched with light surprise dancing in your eyes. “Well, least you know when you’ve met your match.”

“Eh, I dunno. The whole situation seems pretty  _ fishy _ to me.” You grinned, and laughed softly as you watched her face melt into horror. “Oh, for flip’s sake, no wonder you’re her-” Undyne caught herself with a webbed hand clamped over her lips, and your eyebrows rose with newfound curiosity. “He’s my what?”

“nothing. come on,” he slipped his left hand out of his pocket and you were quickly lifted up with a blue glow surrounding your body. “Oh, cool.” You mumbled dimly, still not feeling too great from your current situation. Your mood was known to swing violently, but this time, you just felt completely numb of any emotion at all.

The magic felt odd, leaving your skin tingly all over. The way he nonchalantly held you in air was fascinating, for sure, but you were too exhausted to jump into nerd mode over something he’d probably be a smartass about. You were brought into the living room and sat gently on the couch, before being tackled by a ghost.

“Sissy! Sissy, I’m so glad you’re alright! I was worried sick…” He nuzzled into your sweater, grabbing the fabric with his nubs. You chuckled lightly, before breaking your brother away. “I’m fine. Just can’t walk, is all. Just think of it like the days I couldn’t because of my ankles, but uh. More permanent, I guess.” He stared at you disappointedly, like a parent not mad at their kids, but just knowing they could do a lot better. “Alright, alright, I get it.” You smiled, before grabbing the ghost and perching him by your side on the couch.

Sans and Undyne apparently had been talking in the kitchen while you heard various clangs of metal slapping together, which you could only assume was Papyrus trying to do something resembling cooking. Guin had asked if you’d like to watch TV, and you shrugged your shoulders. Might as well as they all did their stuff.

On TV seemed to be the same robot you’d seen before, except this time they weren’t wearing a pinstriped suit. Instead, they were wearing a flowy blue gown, ruffles littering it in every place thinkable. It was kind of pretty, but on the gray robot with his fluorescent yellow and red panel lights… Not so much. 

“Ohh, it’s Mettaton! He’s so lucky.” Your bro cooed beside you, and you looked at him fondly. “Whaddya mean?”

“Well, it’s important to us ghosts to become corporeal. Mettaton was one of the first to ever become so, so he’s like an idol to us.” He grinned, snuggling in closer to your form. Smiling lazily, you turned up the volume.

“Hello, monsters! It is me, your favorite robot, Mettaton! It is currently Saturday, the 1st of October! A month of ghosts and ghouls, if you will!” He laughed at his somewhat sadistic pun, and you snickered as well. Well played. “Today, we have a friend of mine, his name is Napstablook. He will be our guest star on Cooking with a Killer Robot!” He blew a kiss to the camera, well, as best as a mouthless being really could. “Oh, Napstablook!” You called, before staring at the blue tinted ghost on TV. “You know him?”

“Yeah, on my way through the Ruins I met him, sadly I didn’t get to talk to him before Toriel dragged me away in a hurry.” You laughed good heartedly, wrapping an arm around your brother like a happy drunkard.

You absentmindedly watched the show in front of you, and marveled at how Mettaton was exuberant, while his self proclaimed cousin was rather shy overall. He seemed to have big globs of tears on the edge of his eyes at all times. All the ghosts seemed to have defining features, so you couldn’t help but wonder what Mettaton’s was. “Okay, you know how all you ghosts have little things that define you?” He nodded. “What’s Mettaton’s?”

“He has a fringe, like he does in his proper robot form. He rarely shows anything other than the one you’re seeing now, says it takes up too much power.” He paused, before frowning. “We used to be okay friends before he became corporeal, now he’s wrapped up in stardom.” 

“Well, now you got me, ain’t that enough?” You let your casual southern drawl slip out, and coughed it away. 

Sans quickly came out of the kitchen with a huff, and shoved his hands in his pocket. “alright, here’s the game plan, sweetcheeks.” You lightly blushed at the pet name. “we’re gonna get you to hotland to see if alph can get you a shiny new pair a legs.” He glanced at the TV.

“ay, pres, you know met’s true form? with his legs and what not? yeah, your sissy is gonna have some a those.” He frowned. “without the boots.” Guin nodded enthusiastically and tried to grab you off the couch, but then remembered how you couldn’t move. “ay, pap and undys; road trip time.”

You heard something about Undyne being agitated at Sans for calling her that, and you let out a snirk. “Sounds like a plan.” You gestured your arms out for Sans to pick you up again, but instead were greeted by long boney arms picking you up bridal style. “I WILL BE YOUR RIDE, HUMAN! I CAN GUARANTEE THAT YOU ARE IN…” He grinned. “ _ GOOD ARMS _ !” He glittered at the pun, and you laughed at it. “good one, bro.” Sans mumbled, before hurrying Undyne out of the kitchen. “HEY, HANDS OFF!” She yelled, but you could hear the hint of playful aggression in her tone. 

You were almost ran out of the house, before realizing something had wrapped around your neck. “PRESCOTT HERE HAS INFORMED ME THAT HUMANS ARE COLD IN SNOW! SO, I FIGURED GIVING YOU THE GREAT PAPYRUS’ SCARF SHALL KEEP YOU WARM AND COZY!” Grinning like a mad man, you wrapped your arms around his shoulders, mumbling your thanks into the cold metal. 

“What’re we waiting for?! Let’s go!” Undyne called, before shooting a spear somewhere completely random. You let out a laugh, and hugged your arms tight around Guin.

Maybe this might work out afterall.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im sorry for sporadic updates, but i get super excited to post these all!! i hope thats okay ;;


	14. Death

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Monsters are so peculiar.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HOOOO BOY this chapter is somethin alright. its so odd and nothing like i planned it to go but i like it! it shows a lot for the future too.  
> [tumblr](http://madjicks.tumblr.com)

 

The day had been rather uneventful, just various trekking throughout changing climates of the Underground. You had learnt a bit more about Undyne and what her job really was. She wasn’t just a bloodthirsty fish looking to kill, she just wanted to give her people the freedom they deserved.

You’d grown to somewhat admire the girl, especially due to her fire filled nature and oozing confidence. She reminded you of what you dreamed of being while you were younger, a strong hero who just wanted to bring kindness to other people. You grinned at her without realizing it, and she laughed at how goofy you were acting.”C’mon, you goob! Let’s stop dawdling and get on to Hotland!”

“But, I wanna meet ol’ Gerson. His Sea Tea is great.” You groaned, and Undyne laughed at your dramatics. “Well, I can’t blame ya there. Gerson’s a good friend a mine. Old man with a heart of fools gold!” She glubbed, laughing at her little insult. Papyrus was scolding her for it, but she kept going on about how he was an old geezer in need of retirement. The two bickered as you let your feet drift in the water, staring at it with simple delights. You felt a tap on your shoulder, and looked up fondly.

“hey. you ok?” Sans asked, staring at you with a soft smile. You giggled, and played with the scarf wrapped around your neck. “As best as I can be. Today’s been pretty stressful, y’know?”

“yeah, i getcha. oh, that reminds me.” He fished something out of his pockets. “i noticed a while ago that your phone doesn’t work down here, so i hit up alph to give me one since tori didn’t. so, take it.” He hurriedly pushed it into your hands, and then scampered off to laze around the tiff that Undyne and Papyrus were having about how old Gerson truly was.

Guin had fallen asleep in your arms a while ago, which was a miracle, since he was surrounded by two extremely loud monsters who didn’t seem to understand the meaning of inside voices. They were good people there, and you were thankful to have such kind souls to aid you.

Speaking of souls… You pulled yours out rather hesitantly, and noticed there were neon blue lines lighting up the cracks in your soul. It wasn’t the water either, which caused your eyebrows to furrow in confusion.

Your soul was interesting, especially since all the monsters seemed absolutely enamoured by it, Sans in particular. It glowed different colors depending on the moment, whether it be red or purple, it was always an odd mix of the two, sometimes a flash of orange. Since souls had always been described as a myth, or religious belief, to you, it was odd knowing you really did have one.

In your encounter with Flowey, he had described it as the very culmination of your being. Seems humans did take monster history throughout their own, but summed it up to some higher deity. That felt silly. Cradling it in your hands, you simply stared at it with an odd admiration for it. It was rather pretty, you admitted. Probably the only good thing about you, even if it was broken…

You softly pushed it back into your chest, trying your best to not harm the fragile object. The only thing you knew you could really do with souls was use them for encounters. Pondering, you wondered all the possibilities. Since souls were proven to be existent, did that mean soulmates existed as well?

Pushing the childish thought out of your mind, you attempted to push yourself off the creek, only to remember your current situation. You flopped on your side with a groan, waving your arms around for Papyrus to come retrieve you. It seemed their banter finally diminished, and he quickly paced over to you with a smile. “ARE YOU READY TO LEAVE, HUMAN?” He scooped you up, and you nodded your head.

Now cradled in Papyrus’ arms, you looked on. All of you were close to a cavern that had large stalactites hanging from the edges, giving it a rather daunting look. “Is that where we’re going next?” Papyrus confirmed your question with a nod, and you relaxed a bit. Normally, humans would be scared of caves, but you found naturally made structures rather interesting, overall.

You closed your eyes as you jostled in the skeleton’s arms, the rock of his gallop rather soothing, it reminded you of home. Guin was still sound asleep in your arms, and it made you feel rather safe overall. You knew Papyrus was trustworthy, so you had no trouble falling asleep.

“Damn, she’s exhausted if she can sleep in your boney arms.” Undyne jabbed, having a playful grin on her face. Papyrus sighed at her, and rolled his eyes. “NOW, NOW, UNDYNE. SHE HAS BEEN THROUGH QUITE A LOT, AFTER ALL.” His grip tightened on you a bit, just to stabilize you a bit more. 

“i dunno, i’m pretty  _ bone _ tired too.” Sans chirped, causing the other two to groan in response. “Man, can’t you go five minutes without a joke?!” 

“nah, where’s the  _ pun _ in that?” Undyne and Papyrus practically screamed in faux pain. “It’s useless. He’s gonna kill me with his puns.”

“YOU’LL GET USED TO IT, EVENTUALLY. I HEAR THIS DAILY.” Papyrus groaned, even if he had a smile on his skull. He knew it was all in good fun. “SANS, BY THE WAY, COULD YOU EXPLAIN WHAT’S GOING ON?” Undyne nodded with folded arms. “Yeah!! What’s with you and the chick, bone boy?” Sans nervously laughed as he dug his hands further into his pockets. “it’s nothin’.” He shrunk under their accusing glares. “really! i swear.” He was filled to the brim with suppressed embarrassment, especially since you were  _ right there _ .

Sans never really enjoyed feeling for people. He’d always been an apathetic guy who just loves his bro. He’s had flings in the past, but that was really it. And those were during his teens when he lived in the Capital… They weren’t anything special. They usually just ended in friendship anyway. He wasn’t a guy to date that much. 

But, with you, he had little to no choice. He felt drawn to you, and it honestly disgusted him. Why did fate decide a human to be his… Even thinking the word gave him synthetic nausea, so he pushed the thoughts away to dwell on later when he was a bit more alone than he is in the present.

He let out a sigh, and fiddled with the fabric of his mittens. Trying to distract himself from you was hard, especially, like he said earlier, you were meters away from him. At least you were in good arms, his brother was trustworthy and vowed to protect you no matter what. His bravery was also rather admirable, and Sans somewhat wished he was the one to have these feelings. He’d handle it a lot better.

“Sans, look out, you’re about to slap right into a rock, dumbass.” Undyne teased, toothy grin lighting the room. They were about to enter the path that lead to Hotland, and much to Sans’ chagrin, he had almost done exactly what Undyne explained. “oops.”

Undyne let out a sigh. Papyrus’ brother was definitely a handful, and to be honest, she didn’t want to bring his lazy ass along. But, it was kind of needed. Even if Undyne loved Alphys to death, she didn’t have the smarts the shortass skeleton did. They could talk science for hours, while Undyne was left to just nod and try to pitch in with silly remarks.

She wasn’t all guts and brawn, but she wasn’t on that level of science. She knew her way around, but she couldn’t explain the makeup of molecules and what not. That was beyond her in almost every way possible. She was too busy thinking about when to attack a human next.

Speaking of humans, she glanced over to your corpse-like body. All of your limbs had fallen limp, your legs especially. Well, that made sense, they were more useless than a bag of bricks.

Your face was curled into somewhat of a snarl, and Undyne stared at you hesitantly. Were you having a nightmare, possibly? It would make sense, I mean, if Undyne got paralyzed by some big ass fish, she’d probably have nightmares too.

She puffed out her chest in some sort of selfish pride, trying to make herself feel better for her rash actions. The thing is, is that she couldn’t have much pride in her past decisions. She  _ really _ didn’t wanna see short stack over there flare up like that again.

Sans was interesting. He constantly had this aloof persona about him, but Undyne could tell how powerful he really was beneath all of that. He wasn’t just some worthless skeleton that’d be better off dust, he was just… Tired? That was the only thing she could properly describe him as. Papyrus never had the sunken in eye sockets’ that his brother always had, which was weird, since Sans was always sleeping every chance he got. 

Her mouth curled into a frown, and she crossed her arms. These two… They were odd, to say the least. They were both kind of like anomalies, but Undyne really couldn’t understand why. Being soulmates kind of made sense, since it was clear they were both hiding important aspects of themselves.

Now, that brings her thoughts to Papyrus. She knew he had the facade of innocence and naivety, but it didn’t sit right with her. He was definitely a pacifist at heart, but she knew how much potential he had. He could make an admirable guardsman, but he didn’t want to hurt anyone. That was his biggest flaw.

She knew he knew more than he let on, especially in those moments she would see him most vulnerable. He was an incredible skeleton who used his abilities to the fullest, almost the polar opposite of his lazy brother. She couldn’t help but wonder if Sans had the same, if not stronger, magic as Papyrus. They were related, so it was definitely a possibility.

“hey, fishy. watch out, you’re ‘bout to slap into a rock.” Undyne grit her teeth at the skeleton’s echoing, before being met in the face by a stalactite. “Ow!” She cried, putting her hand over her nostrils. That hurt.

Sans was giggling like a mad man, shit eating grin on his face. Papyrus looked at the two, somewhat ashamed. He really wished they would properly get along, but their personalities were just too clashed. Undyne was a woman who loved danger and action, while Sans was a man who just wanted to sleep. Even if Papyrus knew of his brother’s severe depression, he didn’t speak of it. He knew it was a sensitive topic, and to tell anyone else was downright disrespectful.

He let out a sigh, and readjusted you in his arms to keep you asleep. He examined the negative expression on your face, and frowned. You reminded him much of his brother, and it seemed you also had nightmares like him. At least you didn’t have magic to run rampant in those uncontrolled moments, or else Papyrus may have to force you to regain consciousness.

You deserved your rest, though, and he respected that. You have had quite a rough week, and if Papyrus’ arms were a good place for you to replenish your energy, than he was more than happy to aid. He closed his eyes for just a moment, and let his surroundings truly sink in. He was almost at the entrance to Hotland, with a human, his brother, his best friend, and the human’s dead brother in her arms. It was an odd predicament, but he’d be lying if he said he wasn’t happy for the sudden change of quest.

“CAN WE PLEASE MOVE ON? I WOULD LIKE TO HELP THE HUMAN WALK ONCE MORE. I MAY BE A STRONG SKELETON, BUT I DO NOT KNOW IF I CAN HOLD HER FOR MORE THAN AN HOUR OR TWO.” Sans jerked up to his brother, and let out an exasperated laugh. “here, lemme take her bro.”

“NO, YOU MUSN’T. I KNOW HOW STRENUOUS YOUR MAGIC IS ON YOU, SO I WOULD PREFER FOR ME TO BE IN CHARGE OF HER TRANSPORT. SURELY YOU CAN UNDERSTAND.” He said, tightening his hold on the human. He felt obligated to protect her in such a fragile state, and he wasn’t sure if his brother would be able to levitate her long enough without causing stress to her already damaged soul.

“ok.” Sans shrugged, pocketing his hands once more. Undyne stared at the brothers in confusion, still trying to figure out who really was in control here. She let out a groan, and waved for them to continue their hike to the lab.

“oh, hey, wait.” Sans signalled, before ducking behind one of his sentry stations. Undyne let out a strangled noise, trying to fan herself with her hand. Hotland was one of her least favorite places, since it dried out her normally shiny skin almost instantly. “tadah.” Sans grinned, a bottle of ketchup and hot sauce in each of his hands. “We’re about to get this girl’s legs working, and you’re worried about condiments?!” She screamed, flailing her hands about. Sans had been laughing at her antics, before looking behind her to look at you.

You still had that look of distaste on your face, your eyebrows quirked to resemble anxiety. You were sweating non stop, and he didn’t know if it was from the dream, or Hotland’s overwhelmingly warm atmosphere. He desperately hoped it was the latter.

You jerked awake with a cry, shoving your hands desperately into your face to stop the tears. “Stop, stop, stop…” You sobbed, trying to not cause a scene. You didn’t know where you were, but it wasn’t home. None of this is familiar. You started to struggle, before realizing your legs couldn’t move, and you cried in fear. “Where am I?!” You screamed, shoving a hand into your holders face, causing him to drop you from shock. 

You hit the scalding hot ground with a thud, and immediately your sobs started increasing in severity. “Why is it so hot? Where am I?” You cried, and immediately flinched when you felt a hand on your back. “Leave me alone! Don’t touch me you fucking monster!” You cried, trembling in fear. Why is he here? Was he here to kill you? “I didn’t do it! I didn’t hurt anybody! Please don’t hurt me!” You screamed, hiding your face by your arms. Your legs were crumpled underneath you. 

You were smacked in the face, causing you to jerk out of your breakdown. This caused anger to flare in you, causing you to launch at your assailant. You wrapped your hands violently around their throat, causing them to freak out under your heavy body. “Don’t hit me! Don’t do anything! I’ll fucking ruin you!” You screeched, tears flying onto their face. Their eye was squeezed shut, their hands trying to pry yours off their neck. “GET OFF!” She screamed, flinging you off of her. You squeaked from the sheer anger and force in her actions and tone, before crumpling on the ground. Normally, you would have gotten up and fought back, but you couldn’t move. You couldn’t move, oh god. You screamed as you took in how blue your legs were.

“HUMAN! HUMAN, SNAP OUT OF IT! RELAX.” Hands were placed on your shoulders, causing you to jerk back to reality. Staring deep into the his eyes, you realized where you were. “And I thought Sans’ nightmares were bad… JP, you almost hurt Undyne beyond repair.” His calm tone caused your shoulders to slump, and you jabbed your hands to your face. You mumbled sorry over and over, and Papyrus softly stroked your back.

Sans stared at the scene in horror. He saw that look in your eyes, both of fear and downright anger. What had provoked that? What did you see to make you act so animalistic? After Papyrus had eventually calmed you down, he made his way over to your now broken form.

He yanked the fabric around your neck, and brought you up to his eye level. “the fuck is wrong with you?!” He growled, staring daggers at you.

“Let me go.” You mumbled, anger flaring up once more within you. “no, fucking explain yourself.”

“I don’t have to. Let me fucking go.” You demanded, glaring at him with cold eyes. “I swear to fucking god if you don’t let me g-”

_ Crack _ .

Blood slipped out of your left ear, rendering it useless. All you could hear was ringing, not the cries of shock behind the monster in front of you. He just punched you. In the skull.

Something broke inside of you, and you felt your eyes morph into...  _ something _ .

“oh no.” Sans looked at his fist, only now realizing what he’d done. What was wrong with him? He quickly teleported away, only for you to follow by snatching the edge of his jacket.

“You’re not fucking running this time, asshole.” You coldly stared at him, only for him to slightly shrink back. How were you standing? Why were your eyes orange?

You walked closer to him, before softly gripping the edge of his chin. He stared at you in horror, not knowing at all what you were going to do.

Slowly slipping your hand around his neck, you heard a crunch beneath your hands, and grinned.

 


	15. Title

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Don't break the rules.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [tumblr](http://madjicks.tumblr.com)

You were out of control.

How disgusting you were, killing a monster. Who was the monster, now? You were. Chara stared at you with discontempt, debating whether they should just wipe your measly existence then and there. You had failed their plans, so what more purpose did you have in this world? Funny thing is, you didn’t. One job, you had. One job, you lost. You are foul.

They near glared at you, blood red eyes signifying the sheer anger they felt towards your very being. There was no defending yourself. Consequences for your actions are law, they litter your life like weeds. And, all you wanted to do, was pluck them like you did with Sans’ skull. Horrible simile.

“What do you have to say for yourself?” They asked, expecting some feeble excuse for your inexcusable actions. But, all you did was plead guilty, you knew there was no saving yourself from your punishment. Even Frisk was enraged by your actions, the so called ‘Pacifist.’

There was absolutely no way to stand your ground here. What does a human do before a god? Grovel? Beg for forgiveness? But, you weren’t one for religion, so you weren’t trained for these unexpected situations laid before you like a rotten platter. Your face was scrunched up in self guilt, and your eyes were closed with expectations of physical discipline.

Yet, nothing happened.

“You’re lucky we have control over the flow of time, or else, you would be dust. Or just a corpse, your metaphor.” Chara sighed, arms now folded in downright childish exasperation. You let out a sigh of pleasantry, and kneeled toward the one who considered you their pawn. “We’ll turn you back to shortly before you all enter Hotland. But, be careful. Sans has memory of these. We’re splitting the timelines to let you wander between them.” Their eyes suddenly revealed how exhausted they truly were, and you watched as they collapsed into Frisk’s almost too ready arms. “Close your eyes. You will return to then.” It was the first time you had ever heard Frisk’s voice, and you were surprised by the quelled rage hidden behind their tone. With a nod and bow, you shut your eyes gently, and you were whisked back to the entrance of Hotland, still perched in Papyrus’ boney arms.

It was hard to play off that you just downright murdered his only brother, while holding your supposed to be dead brother tight in your arms. Youthful whims, are they not?

Seemed they were all bickering over some pointless thing, and you wondered if you could truly change fate. What if you messed up again, and Chara truly did erase you? That wouldn’t be satisfactory in your eyes, so you decided you’d be on your best behaviour.

But, you also remembered, that your legs were still useless. You couldn’t walk on them, and that short time in the Void had wiped your memory clean of this. So, when you tried to hop out of Papyrus’ arms, you were greeted with your body crumpling to the damp ground.

You pushed yourself out of the mud with a disgusted remark, and took in your surroundings. Everything seemed normal, except that occasional flicker in your vision. Probably a side effect of time altering. You’d deal with it, just hope that it would vanish once you breached the seal of the Underground.

“HUMAN! ARE YOU ALRIGHT?” Only now realizing fully that, no, you weren’t surrounded by humans, your face contorted with disgust. “Yeah, sure.” You grumbled, your mood completely soured by the previous events that just took place. Weird, a short trip to the void can do a lot, huh?

You weren’t scared of anyone now, other than Chara, of course. They could wipe your entire being with a flick of their oh so thin wrist. You blankly stared at Undyne and Sans having a pointless argument over whether it was a stalactite, or a stalagmite, which caused you to groan. “It doesn’t fucking matter. Can we go get my legs fixed, or are we gonna stay here all day with no end goal?” A bit snappier than you would’ve liked, but it got the point across. Papyrus seemed shaken by your remark, but lifted you back into his arms. You were surprised that he didn’t say anything about your use of cuss words, but he didn’t seem cheery enough to. Seems you’ve completely soured the mood. Good job, JP! You’re supposed to be acting as if nothing happened, yet here you are, messing everything up like the fool you are to the core.

A groan dared to breach your dry lips, but you used every bit of control you had to prevent it. Didn’t need another reason to self deprecate. You flopped back in Papyrus’ arms, desperately trying to reach for that comfort you attained before all this happened. It proved to be difficult, but whatever. 

The group in general seemed to be affected by your sour mood, dampening their previously playful ones significantly. But, you didn’t have a care in the world. They’re in your control, or more Chara’s, not the other way around. You didn’t feel a bit of remorse with your current attitude, and you quickly had slipped into teenage arrogance. 

You all quickly arrived at Alphys’ lab, and you were hurriedly ushered in, Papyrus carrying you along, of course. Being quite literally dumped onto a couch, you glared at the ceiling. Guinness had escaped your arms quite some time ago, but you were too enraptured with your anger to give a care.

There was hushed whispering in the other room, and you were completely oblivious to the soft footsteps approaching your form. You were too wrapped up in annoyance.

“so.” The deep voice stirred you out of a zone out session, and you propped yourself up on an elbow. Seems little skeleton wants to play adult. “what changed?” 

You let your blue eyes settle into scowl, and the hand that was digging into your face moments before dug harder. “Bad sleep. Bones aren’t cuddly.” Guess playing the fool was a way to avoid certain confrontation, and if played properly, you could make him second guess himself. “seemed cuddly earlier.” He glowered over you, and the sweat that gathered at your hairline was provoking you lashing out. “what changed?” Repetition was something you despised. 

“Doesn’t matter. If you’re trying to intimidate me, I’d quit it, bone boy. You can’t scare someone who doesn’t fear death.” 

“is that so?” You nodded your head slowly, trying to push his buttons to see what the hell he was trying to accomplish. A grin spread to your face, and you watched as the lights in his eyes faded. You felt invincible for the first time in years, all second guesses wiped clean by pure arrogance.

“good to know.” His entire demeanor changed, which caused your facetious smile to falter. His eyes returned back to their catacombs of black. “come on, alph has to do fitting.” You were jerked off of the couch by magic, and you suddenly remembered that these monsters could easily torture you with skill alone. This wasn’t a manner of strength, it was overpowerment. They were in the lead here, not you.

It was near degrading how this skeleton could make your anger diminish with a single magic trick that made you float. You huffed as you crossed your arms over your chest, digging your nose into the scarf wrapped around your neck. Papyrus gave you this. And, you’ve been nothing but a bitch to him ever since this time split.

Seems you really are a shitty person, huh? Your scowl fell along with your anger, and you relaxed in the almost safe feeling magic around you. “Sorry.” You mumbled, before digging your face into the scarf even more to hide your impending blush. Why had you taken out your anger on everyone else? You were the one in the wrong here, not them.

“accidents happen. consider us even.” You knew what he implied, but before you could properly process his forgiveness, you were floated into another room. A small, yet wide, yellow lizard was huddled near an array of soldering tools. 

“She’s here, Alphy.” Undyne murmured, staring at you with a ‘I dare you to do something’ look. Seems the two are a thing, huh. Cute. You were gently settled into a nearby recliner, and you somewhat missed the magic encasement. “S-So, I’ve gotten air of you losing the ability to move your legs… Is t-that correct?” Her stutter was charming, and so was the smile you flashed her way. Play flirt, may cut the price. 

“That’s what I’m told.” Smug was written all over your features and tone of voice, before it was quite literally knocked out of you by a fin filled slap to your upper back. You sat straight as a board. “Okay… Utilizing your soul, I can make the limbs link with it and thrive off of its power… I need to see your s-soul, first, though.” She adjusted her glasses on her snout, and looked questioningly your way. “This’ll only be a second…” You were used to this by now, your soul being jerked out of your chest for the fourth time today. 

“O-Oh. Wow.” She stared at it with what seemed to be fear, and clutched it in her hands. How come everytime they did this, you felt exhausted? It was like every ounce of energy was leached out of your body. “Alright… I may have to, uh, readjust my b-blueprints to fit your quite peculiar soul… I’ve never seen one this broken before…”

“alphys.” Sans murmured, jerking his hands out of his pocket to signify how unintentionally rude she had just been. You were numb to it though, too focused on trying to stay conscious. She tried to backpedal, but you couldn’t even register the words in your current state of fatigue. “Dude, why’s she so tired looking?”

Alphys looked at your glassed over eyes, pale face, and hung open jaw. It was like you were a corpse with a faintly beating hard. “O-Oh my god.” She quickly pushed your soul back into your chest, and your vision bloomed with sparks. Your hand clutched your head in an attempt to steady yourself, but the glitches continued. “What’s happening?!” Undyne screamed, watching as your body jerked.

“you fucking idiot.” Sans called, before smacking you across the face. Previous memories flashed across your vision, something that felt like it happened moments previous now feeling as if it were in the present. “come back!” He screamed, shaking your shoulders desperately. Alphys was trying to flip through her notes to find something that pertained to your current state of unreality. 

With a scream, you came back to your senses, your hands gripped tightly on the arms of your chair. The glitches were still present in your vision, but not to everyone else. “What just happened?” You whispered, not exactly finding your voice without extreme strain to the chords. “we don’t know.” The skeleton stared at you in severe concern, his hands still on your shoulders. Your vision wasn’t straight, and it felt like you’d just had a concussion that made your vision wavy.

“I’ve never seen something like this happen before… Has it with you?” Undyne shook her head violently, her panic setting in. Alphys stutter was nearly gone, so she knew this was a serious matter. “we can’t take her soul out anymore.” Sans near growled, trying to set you into a mode of collection. “it’s okay. we’re here.” He smoothed his hand against your face. You leaned into his touch. 

You let your heavy lids fall close, desperately trying to calm the severe pain that hammered against your temples. What happened? You were as confused as everyone else was. But, the problem was, you had a slight idea why. However, you could not let everyone know your suspicions, it would reveal what happened before that no one else knew. 

Except Sans, of course, and that was why his comfort was so special. He knew how to soothe you, even though he’d only known you for barely a week. You two felt near connected in some odd way, and you weren’t sure how to feel about it.

“I don’t want to do this anymore…” You mumbled, a single tear spilling out of your left eye. It was so tiring, you didn’t want to do anything. Chara should have erased you for your sin, not let you continue to suffer underground with these horrible side effects of time turning. His skull leaned against your forehead, and you felt a moment of relief. “i know, but you have to.” He said, with more affection in his tone than you’d ever heard from anyone before.

The tears evolved into something much more, them falling down your face like a heavy rainstorm with endless pouring. You weren’t sure how much longer you could continue this endless drag, having no break. Your legs were useless, your Soul was broken, you were broken. Why couldn’t you still be up on the surface?

Why was life so determined to keep you in the realm of the living?


	16. Heartfelt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This will all be okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is actually my favorite. its soft, and genuine. i hope you all enjoy it as much as i do  
> [tumblr](http://madjicks.tumblr.com)

Your eyes were cold as Alphys desperately fiddled with your legs, trying to find a way to construct a new pair without a connection to your soul. Seemed it was proving to be difficult, especially since you were here longer than any of you had planned in the first place. Maybe she’s a slow worker? Who cares, you’re ready to just go back to Snowdin and be a hermit. 

Dumb idea, but it seemed nice in your currently catatonic state. Apparently, soul tinkering was more exhausting than you were familiar with. Least you weren’t as snappy as earlier, but still. Damn Undyne caused all this shit, you had a right to be at least somewhat pissy.

And, to top it all off, Papyrus was still absent from this whole ordeal. Something about him fawning over some robot. The name sounded familiar, but you were too out of it to really care. Your eyes were glazed over, and to be fair, you could totally go for a nap right now. Not like anyone would allow it, though. 

“I-I think I can construct something with all this new info. Try and come back tomorrow, and we can hook you up.” Alphys hands (claws?) trembled, which caused your paranoia to somewhat flare. “What’s the trembles for?”

“W-Well...We’ll have to saw off your calves, but I can put you in something akin to anaesthesia… Is that alright?” You were caught off guard by her, but honestly, you didn’t think you’d need it. Not like your nerves were able to work from the waist down. That’s disappointing. Guess no more sex for you, huh?

“Whatevs.” You mumbled nonchalantly, letting your head rest in your palms. Today was so utterly exhausting, you could care less about anything, really. All you needed was a good nap. Without really realizing what you were doing fully, your hand slipped into another. A more skeletal one, it seemed. “Is there anyway we could get it over with sometime today?”

“No... I wish we could about as much as you d-do, but I still have to construct a plan and the limbs themselves.” A sigh escaped your lips, but you muffled it as best as you could. The hand around yours squeezed encouragement, which made you smile.

“Sorry, Sans. Seems you’re gonna have to deal with me a little longer.” You joked, which thankfully made him huff a laugh. No response was necessary. Undyne had apparently rushed away to retrieve Papyrus, and Alphys skittered away to work on blueprints. The two of you were now alone.

“you alright?” Sans asked, directing his attention to your rather limp body. “...I guess.” You weren’t confident in lying to him and just saying you were tired, even though you really were. But, there were worse things plaguing your mind at the moment, this situation being one of them. What were you two? Friends? Best friends? You could maybe see you as friends, but once again, you barely had known each other for over a week. “i can tell you got a question. what’s up?”

You stared at his short form with far off eyes, unsure as to whether you should confide in him or not. The connection between you two was so obvious, but you weren’t sure if he was able to handle your emotional baggage. And, what would you tell Friz? Just leave him in the dust when you get to the surface? He probably thinks you’re dead, anyways, and you probably will never reach there going at this rate.

Maybe just a little bit will go a long way. “It’s nothing.” You said with a smile, and shook your head of any dark thoughts. It wasn’t worth crying over, and you were stronger than this. But, these monsters felt so honest, so sweet, so you wouldn’t mind telling them everything about you. Why you’re this way, why you flinch at certain actions. There’s so many things, you could verbally write a novel about yourself. 

Your thumb stroked his smooth palm, and you stared off into a near corner. May as well zone out while Undyne tries to get Papyrus away from his robocrush. All you could guess was that there was no way Mettaton could ever reciprocate. You...Kind of hoped he didn’t. Didn’t seem like the kindest person, so you felt he wasn’t fit for Papyrus’ overly kind and giving nature. 

Undyne quickly entered the room, with an endlessly chatty skeleton trailing behind her. More like she was dragging him, but whatever. “Come on, lovebirds! Let’s go!” Your cheeks flushed at the term, but you quickly turned away to hide them. Seemed neither of you denying it only caused Undyne’s grin to widen. With the corners of her mouth reaching from fin to fin, she definitely resembled a shark in front of easy prey.

Bad metaphor. Was that racist? Who knows. With you swept off your butt by Papyrus’ arms, you were ran out the door, the entire group pacing along. What’s the rush? Also, where’s Prescott? “Where’s my little bro?”

“Oh! He’s with Alphys. She’s making him a body.” The thought of your legs literally abandoned your mind at the thought of your brother having a body again. He could be corporeal, walk properly, a bunch of things he dreamed to do. Hypothetical tears gathered in your eyes, and the big smile on your face lit up your group’s attitude entirely.

A fist was slapped against your arm. “You’re welcome.” Undyne smirked, revealing that she clearly was apart of that convincing. Poor Alphys, she was gonna crash by tonight. “I’m only ridin’ with you guys this far, though. I’m sleepin’ at Alphys’ tonight!” She said enthusiastically, earning an approving nod from Papyrus. “I WISH YOU TWO LUCK!” Sans grunted with the good wishes, and ran just a little faster beside his brother. Undyne waved goodbye, before turning the opposite direction and going back to the Lab.

Idle chatter filled the area surrounding you three, Papyrus discussing various dinner ideas, and Sans throwing in a pun or two. Life seemed really great right now. 

It took about half an hour for you guys to reach the River Person to boat you back to Snowdin, but you couldn’t help but notice the beads of sweat gathered on the Skelebros’ skulls. You all hopped into the boat, and you noticed there was a head of a puppy on the front of the raft. “Ohh.” You cooed, and before you knew it, your previously planted butt was in mid air, jumping along the boat that was literally running (!) across the water. How cool! It seemed to be even faster than the usual ride, and you couldn’t help but wonder if this was ordered, somehow. 

Arriving Snowdin was definitely something that reminisced a wakeup call, since the cold weather snapped at your pale skin. It was like snow-made dogs were trying to bite across your face, and you desperately desired warmth. Your teeth chattered, and the skeletons at your sides examined you curiously.

“HUMAN, WHY ARE YOUR TEETH JUMPING?” Interesting way to phrase it, Papyrus. “It’s from the cold. I got used to Waterfall and Hotland, which are both pretty warm.” Waterfall from humidity, and Hotland because, you know, literal lava around every landform. Now realizing how freezing it was for you, you tried to run in the direction of their house, but once again mentally kicked yourself for not remembering about your legs.

“Ugh. I hate this so much.” You groaned, and magic surrounded you once more. Nearly moaning from the warmth that enveloped you, you blushed with embarrassment. And, surprisingly, this helped you determine that the blue on Sans cheekbones was indeed  _ not _ lighting. Blue blush. How cute.

Wait, did you just call him cute? How can a skeleton be cute? You stuck out a tongue in mental adamance, and closed your eyes until you arrived at their place. Your glasses were watery from the pelt of fresh snow, so there wasn’t any point to try and look through them. With eyes shut tight and arms wrapped around your chest, you were slowly guided across Snowdin. Damn, you could totally go for some Grillby’s right now. Maybe you should ask Sans later on. 

Finally, you heard the click of a door, and you were pushed into their house, and promptly laid down on the couch. Surprising, you were expecting Sans to throw you down like usual. Maybe he’s tired. You noticed that he looked at his right wrist as if he had a watch, and then he mumbled to Papyrus about something involving bed and a story.

The two drudged off, leaving you alone to revel in your thoughts on the springy couch. They were in chaos, your thoughts, and you were rather conflicted to either settle them or let them run wild. Either truly worked, since you were used to having a mess of thoughts. Grillby’s floated into your mind once more, and your mouth practically watered. God, food sounded so delightful right now. Your eyes drifted to the clock on the wall, it reading 7:20pm. Still rather early, but maybe Papyrus needed his rest. 

He did seem rather exhausted when you all arrived home, so it would make sense for him to go to bed early. Maybe this was even his normal bedtime, you were clueless. Even though you acted as if you knew these two forever, you’d only known them for a short time.

Footsteps coming down the stairs made you dopily look up, only to lock eyes with a certain short skeleton. You flashed a warm smile his way, and attempted to push yourself off the couch to greet him, but you were once again reminded of your crippling. Sigh.

“U-Um, little help here?” You stuttered, folding your hands in your lap. “no need, let’s just relax for a bit.” He grinned, flopping down on the couch next to you. Disappointment flooded your eyes, since you really wanted to go to the warm bar to have a happy da- hangout session, for once. 

“what’s wrong?” You quickly fanned yourself. “Nothing.” It was the truth. Sure, you were mad at not being able to go out and eat, but it wasn’t anything super drastic. Yet, the noises that came from your stomach told you otherwise. “Hehe...A little hungry, I guess.” Admission was not your thing, but this monster seemed to make you into putty. “grillby’s?” You excitedly nodded your head, and grabbed his hand. He chuckled at your antics, and quickly slipped you immediately to Grillby’s.

“Woah, I didn’t know you could do it so quick!” You exclaimed, lips parted in minor awe. “‘s close by, no need to visit the void.” Cool! You could only hope it was less strenuous on his mindstate. Magic surrounded your lower limbs, and he guided you along. Having a resemblance to legs again was more than you could ask for. 

He moved you along to one of the bar stools, completely ignoring the looks he was getting and the minor cheers that would only be heard by the trained ear. Your butt was placed on a stool before he ducked away, apparently going to talk to a friend. Grillby greeted you with a few happy (?) crackles, and you smiled. “Do you have milkshakes?”

He nodded in response, and you ordered one. Sweets sound kickin’ right now, especially since you hadn’t had any since your temporary stay in the Ruins with Toriel. Wondering if you could somehow contact her again, you were snapped out of your thoughts by Sans accompanying you once again in the seats. “sorry, bun over there,” he jabbed a thumb in the dizzy eyed bunny slumped against a table behind him, “was wondering about your legs. i told her the gist of it.” 

“Not the whole thing, right?”

“nah, don’t worry. i’m not one for telling long stories.” He laughed, and you knew it was untrue, but you also knew it was him playing off his lazy schtick. He ordered a bottle of ketchup and a burger. “Oh! By the way…” You decided you would finally ask him about the condiments Papyrus bought for him. “I noticed you like drinking condiments,” he seemed to tense at your mentioning of this, “are they special down here or something? Does Grillby add a special mix of spices?” All things tense in him immediately melted, and a genuine smile grew on his face.

“i was expecting you to make fun of me.” He laughed, before letting his hands out of his pockets. “nah, i just really like condiments. ketchup is my favorite.” Your eyes practically glittered. “I really love hot sauce! I noticed Papyrus bought some, so you do too right?” His eyes were wider than you even realized in your moment of excitement, and he let out a chortle. “yeah. it’s more of a treat for me, though.”

“Same here, I usually put it in Ramen and on scrambled eggs. Makes it so yummy!” You were a total foodie, having been raised with little to no food meant you ate anything you could get your hands on. Grillby came out of the fire exit and back to the bar area, before setting a bottle of ketchup, a milkshake, and a burger in front of you two. “Food!” You exclaimed, smile large on your face. “Sorry to be a bother, but could I maybe get a small bucket of fries?” Grillby crackled amusedly at your request, and put up a hand before disappearing once more. 

You took a big gulp of the milkshake, enjoying the vanilla flavors and little bits of magic mixed into it. It was like having pop rocks without the rocks, and it was super great! “you seem happy, what’s up?”

Your cheeks colored, and you would never mentally admit it was because you had food with him. “I dunno, but the food here is always great. Must be that.” It was a half truth, and you were obscenely fond of those. They were your resource for always getting past your mother, and they worked for when you were nervous. “what’s the whole truth?” He asked with raised brows, and your cheeks literally burned from blood flow. Your hand covered the side of your face, and you directed all your attention to the vanilla milkshake on the bar counter.

Sans was laughing, before he slipped his mittens off and took hold of his burger. You watched as his jaws unhinged and bit into it, revealing somewhat normal teeth. And… A tongue! It was blue! Did he bleed blue, too? Did he bleed at all? I mean, bones have blood vessels in them, but not enough to actually bleed when broken, right? 

Maybe one of these days you can both discuss your anatomy. But, for now, this wasn’t the time and place. “God, these milkshakes are to die for. Especially with the magic infused vanilla? So good.” It was small talk, because you really wanted to stop thinking about skeleton anatomy before it got too far. “yeah, i come here every night when i can. i’m a total reg here.” Sans seemed to indulge your small talk, and for that you were thankful. “Oh, that reminds me…” You fished through your pockets, and slipped a book out of your right one.

“I should probably turn this back in. Thank goodness it’s not damaged.” Dunno how Grillby’s reminded you of the Librarby, but it did. “By the way, what’s with the typo for the Library?”

Sans grinned facetiously, and you were weary of his response. “basically, it was being built when me an’ pap first arrived here. they said if we helped with the painting and sign, we could take residence in the house next door until we were old enough to work.” Weird story, but it seemed he wasn’t finished. “since pap was a babybones, he wasn’t that great at spelling. when he asked me what to put, i sort of slurred the words from fatigue, so he put librarby.” He grinned happily at the memory. “they decided to keep it, and asgore never had any problems with it. gives it some charm.” 

Thinking of little Papyrus made your heart warm, and you couldn’t help but think about your brother up on the surface. “Y’know, if we’re telling sibling stories, I can tell some.”

“about pres? i already know a lot about him, though.”

“Nah, about my bro, Zefram. He’s uh…” You put out your fingers to count his age, not having seen him in a while putting a stop to your brain. “He’s 9, almost 10. But, I love him as much as you love Papyrus.”

“doubt that.” He ribbed, and you huffed in minor exasperation. “Seriously! That kid is the light of my life. I hate that I had to leave him there, but at least they treat him a lot better than they ever did with me.” The bitterness in your voice was directed at your parents completely, them having basically treated you like a ragdoll to toss around your whole life. “But, anyways. I remember this one time. It was little Zeffy’s first day of preschool, and man, he was so excited.” Your eyes were warm in reminiscence. “He always went on and on about how much he wanted to go to school. I swear, that kid is a bundle of joy.”

“But, anyways. He came up to me as I was on the porch having a cig, and he said ‘Sissy, what are you doing?’ and I immediately felt guilty. I told him ‘Something I never want you to do, okay, little guy? Keep strong and healthy.’ and I vowed from then on that I wouldn’t smoke as long as I lived in that house. Didn’t stop my parents from their chain smoking and bong hits, though. They kept going like some sort of train.” Even though it was somewhat of a bitter memory, you still smiled fondly about any reference to your angel of a brother. 

“I think I was so attached to him because he was born almost a year after Guin died. It was really surprising, to be honest, since my parents were going through a divorce at the time, which they cancelled when those two blue lines popped up.” Your eyes saddened. “The day he was born, I was 10. When I saw him in the hospital, I immediately fell in love with his pink little body.” Without realizing it, some tears had made your eyes watery. “My motto from then on was ‘I already lost one, not gonna lose another.’ and I made sure he knew I was his biggest support.” They slipped down your face. “I miss him.”

Arms slipped around your core, and you let Sans lean into your body. “y’know…” He mumbled into your sweater, causing you to squirm. “i know you miss the surface a lot, but we’re all glad to have you down here. you could truly be the saviour of our race.” His words seemed genuine, and you ran your hand over his skull. “I dunno if my dumbass can do something that huge, but I’m glad you believe in me so much to do so.”

Wow, you really could go for a cigarette right now. Family memories always made you cry quietly, so it made sense that you weren’t bawling into your arms. “And, I mean, if I never came down here, I’d have never gotten my other brother back. Not like I’ll ever tell my Mom that, though. She doesn’t deserve him.” Your voice had fallen to a whisper at the last part, and Sans seemed to understand. “losing a family member is hard. at least i understand why you’re usually so apathetic now.” You quirked a brow at his statement, trying to unravel the meaning behind it. “what i mean is, even though you’ve cried a lot, i see how cold and sheltered you are through your soul. it shows more than you might think.” 

A sad laugh made its way past your lips, you realizing that you had drained the milkshake. A hand was set over yours that was on the bar, and you looked up to see Grillby with a sympathetic look on his face. “I understand more than you may believe. Good luck, young one.” His voice was raspy, and you smiled softly at his good wishes. These monsters were always so sincere with their words, which made you so happy to have them in your life. Even if you did miss the surface dearly, you did enjoy that these monsters weren’t horrible to you.

You had forgiven Undyne for her actions, forgave Toriel for her attack, Sans for his. You understood it all now. They saw you as their key out, and now that you see it, you can now understand fully why they were so invested in your soul. Sans had sat up in his stool once more, and slumped into his arms, just simply staring at you with an unknown look in his eyes. 

“as much as you may deny it, you’re beautiful. inside and out.” You laughed softly at the compliment, and made eye contact. “the same to you, bone boy.” The nickname made his shoulders lightly shake with laughter, and you felt accomplished.

Even though you shed a few tears tonight, this was one of the best you’d had down here. Things truly seemed to be looking for the better, and a smile was clear on your face.

Your aura was red, and you were determined to free these kind monsters from their prison, disabled or not.


	17. Circumstantial

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maybe that's what the veterans were so scared of back in the day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **BIG TW FOR GORE, MUTILATION, SURGERY, SHARP OBJECTS, AND BLOOD. I CANNOT STRESS THIS ENOUGH.**
> 
> edit: I FORGOT TO MENTION GFKDMGKFD  
> I made a playlist for jp!! so if u want to listen to it and get a little bit of foreshadowing, feel free! [link](https://8tracks.com/soueikaku/let-s-go)

Today was the day.

The past few weeks of lazing around before such an extensive surgery were to be expected. Food, laughs, snowballs, etc. You and the skelebros had tightened your bond beyond belief, Undyne being surprisingly absent during it all. Maybe she wasn’t that comfortable with humans like you thought, but you couldn’t care. To be fair, having the thought of your legs being amputated by a monster who you had the impression of being clueless was rather horrifying.

Nothing but second thoughts were channeled through your head. What if you bled too heavy? Or worse, died from blood loss? You weren’t too knowledgeable about the ways of amputation, all you knew was that there were major arteries in your legs that could easily be snipped. Anything could truly happen, and that was what made your anxiety flare the most.

No, you hadn’t had an anxiety attack in quite a while, but going into such a major surgery felt so abnormally wrong. You’d never had something this crazy done to your already damaged body before, so what could really happen? Magic was apart of the equation, so slowly your doubts were wavering, but they were still blaring like alarms. Alphys had reassured you over a phone constructed bond that you were in good hands (claws?), and she wouldn’t do anything life threatening. All you could really hope for was that your nerves wouldn’t suddenly awaken after almost a month of no use and cause you indescribable agony during the procedure.

Papyrus offered a hand for you to hold while going through this, even though he knew you couldn’t feel anything from your pelvis down. You accepted his offer with a smile, and thanked him for his endless feelings of support. 

“S-Seriously, I swear I won’t try to hurt you at all…” She was strangely obsessed with reassuring you, but with your state of panic that you were sure she was too familiar with, she seemed to be trying to calm you down. “If it hurts, just raise your left hand. I-I mean, I’m sure I’ll be able to tell, but you never know…” You knew from your short few weeks of texts and late night calls with the scientist that, even though hesitant, she was confident in her ability. And, for her to even think about doing this, it felt like an arrow through the heart.

The royal scientist, Alphys, who was a complete weeb at heart and just wanted the love she deserved, struck your empathetic strings you figured had withered long ago. You could relate to her on such a level that your friendship was near automatic. Being an anime fan yourself probably helped out, as well.

Sure, you were more one for the action genre, which Undyne heavily clarified was her preference as well, but even you could enjoy some magical cat girls every now and then. Seeing Alphys ramble on and on about her favorite anime was adorable, and you couldn’t help but listen intensely to her rambles. Even though you weren’t that fond of the plotline, you could admit that the 90s anime style always enamoured you with its cell work.

Alphys had never heard of the term, so you had explained in great detail what cell animation truly meant. Hand drawn panels put together to construct beautiful animation that you just can’t achieve digitally. Homesickness struck once more as you remembered your various autographed cells you had collected over the years.

But, now you resumed from your fond memories to the current day, now realizing Alphys was trying to speak to Undyne about using one of her spears as to cauterize your wounds. Of course she was on board, and you couldn’t help but softly smile at the two’s affection for each other. You admired their complete obliviousness, giving you another thought to mull over.

Now that you examine the people in the room, it felt oddly at home, except you were missing someone. Sans wasn’t there, and to be fair, that was kind of disappointing. I mean, it’s not like you’re giving birth or something, but you could really use all the support you could get in a situation where your legs are literally getting _cut_ _off_. 

God, thinking of it that way near gave you chills. You couldn’t shake the thought of this going incredibly wrong, and you were nearly tempted to inquire about the anaesthesia Alphys had offered at the beginning of this all. But, you wanted to put your trust into her. She deserved at least that much.

Papyrus was at your side on a stool, seemingly to be involved with the daily supply of Junior Jumble, something he declared was ‘THE HARDEST PUZZLE’. God, he was so charming. Heart of gold. He’d worn his battle body, of course, but it seemed somehow more relaxed than usual. Weird.

Undyne was still skittering in the corner along with Alphys, which made you seem even more hesitant. Undyne looked behind her and made eye contact with you, her one eye wide with something you couldn’t quite see for sure. She grinned, and jogged over to you, a fin splayed to, you could only guess, give you a slap on the back.

“Man, this would be so much easier if lazybrains was here!” It was like she echoed your thoughts, but the nickname seemed to imply that she meant not for morale, but for helping in a normally single person job. Was Sans really that smart? You never got the opportunity to ask, but you knew he didn’t have the air of being stupid. The laugh that bubbled through your lips encouraged Undyne to blabber on some more. “I mean, really! He’s just gonna laze around and sleep while we got everything goin’ on here!”

It felt more like she was talking for her own sake instead of yours, and you nodded with full understanding. Rambling was a common sign of anxiousness, and you really couldn’t blame her for being nervous. Her hands were wringing together, even if her tight lipped grin tried to disguise the knots that you could only presume gathered in her stomach. Even the most brave people can feel nervous for something practically life threatening, especially when it involved their own magic.

But, you looked at it this way. Even if you did die, the monsters could get the final soul, albeit broken, for the barrier. And, honestly, you could doubt they would miss you more than the opportunity to finally breach their reason for entrapment. You know you wouldn’t.

Okay, maybe that was a bit crueler than you meant, but truly, if you’d only known someone as mentally unstable as you for little over a month, you would care less if they died and were the key to your freedom. Sometimes sacrifice is beneficial, right? But, by the way Papyrus slipped his hand around yours made you realize that maybe… Just maybe, that’s not the way to think.

These folks truly did want you around, and that was surprising to you. The monsters had been so genuinely true to you. They’d been kind to the core, and you were quickly reminded of the time you actually ended a monster’s life.

Thank goodness for Chara.

“JP?” The voice snapped you out of your daze, and you embarrassedly laughed it away. “Sorry, could you repeat that?”

“I-I said that if you wanted the anaesthesia, I’d have to a-administer it now…” Your eyes fell into hers, and you couldn’t help but wonder what they were hiding. The reason to give her that adorable stutter, that nervous personality to her. “I’m sure I’ll be fine. If I’m asleep, I may not be able to,” your throat seemed to melt, and you cleared it with a quick cough. “Sorry. I may not be able to guide you through it when I’m knocked out.” She seemed somewhat relieved by your ideas, almost as if she had the same ones herself. As much as you trusted these monsters, they only knew so much.

“Thankfully, little Prescott has been fillin’ us in on human anatomy as best as he can. He knows more about the brain.” Undyne grinned, turning her back to you once more. “How unfortunate.” You blanched, not feeling particularly keen of the speak of your brother’s anatomy knowledge. Sure, he was human at one point, but like they said, he knew neurological science, not physiology. Thankfully, due to your conditions within your ankles and leg cramps in general, you were able to supply the correct information with confidence. 

You’d launched into total science mode, your love of the topic in full blast. “The thing with amputations is that, even if common practice, there’s always the chance of bleeding out, cauterization or not.” You stated, and chuckled as you watched Alphys and Undyne’s faces’ significantly pale in color. “No worries, if we do this properly, with a few weeks rest, I should be alright.”

A thumb tapped your chin, your index finger fit along it almost too perfectly. “If you have a way to clamp the artery, then I’m sure I would be fine. Honestly, the hardest part will be sawing through the femur.” At this statement, you jumped as Papyrus launched out of his chair. “WAIT, YOUR FEMUR? YOU HAVE A SKELETON?”

“Yeah, Papyrus! Didn’t you know humans got skeletons inside ‘em?” Undyne exclaimed, causing your cheeks to erupt into flames. Bad analogy, fishy. With a cough, you directed attention back to your explanations of how to go about the amputations, still somewhat winded by Papyrus’ sudden hesitation about the procedure. It would be fine.

“Thankfully, Undyne’s magic can easily cut through something as soft as bone…” Bone being described as soft was damn right unnerving, but you gulped away that thought. “I’m sure it’s hot enough to cauterize it as well. P-Papyrus, do you have any magic rings you could summon up?” He nodded enthusiastically, his index finger shooting up with four orange rings looped around it. Woah, what’re those for? 

“These w-will be good enough for clamping, r-right?” You nodded in somewhat of a daze, still shocked by the beauty of magic. “They should be, are they expandable?” Papyrus supplied a quick explanation of how he could easily control their size, causing you to nod your head in confidence. Everything seemed to be going smoothly.

“Are you sure you don’t want to be asleep?” For what seemed to be the millionth time, you nodded your head, it now being in somewhat jest. “I’m sure, Alphys. No worries, wouldn’t be the first time I’ve seen a bit of gore.” 

The way her pupils constricted in horror at the simple light hearted statement caused your heart to skip a beat. “N-Not in that way…” You shuddered, before looking away in surprised bout of embarrassment. What in the hell did she think you meant? You could never hurt someone, you were just curious… God.

“Alright, let’s get this going… Let me steady my hands.” She mumbled, before slipping a pair of scrubs and latex gloves on. Where’d they get those? Weird. She had located a tray filled with various sharp objects, and the turning in your gut told you to run from pure instinct, but you knew doing so would result in… Well, nothing. You couldn’t move.

Man, by the time this is all over, you’re gonna have biomechanical legs. How cool is that? The best you could do was hold Papyrus’ gloved hand with your sweaty one, and wait for the procedure to finish. Normally with surgeries, you would be asleep, or your legs would fidget. Sucked that you couldn’t move them if you wanted to. 

With a deep breath, Alphys finally began her work with a pierce to, ironically, one of your larger self harm scars. Possibly a marker to help her keep still? It made sense, like when people would put marks on your skin when you’d get MRIs. Totally different medical practice, but your head was known for odd connections.

Blood rushed down your thigh, and Undyne joined in to dab at the newly inflicted wound with a towel. Good idea, maybe they did have a method of research they’re currently utilizing. At least you were totally unaffected by the sight of blood, or else, you’d be going mad. It seemed Papyrus was holding onto your hand now to steady himself, while you were completely fascinated. Sure, it was your body, but it wasn’t like you were in pain in any way.

“Alright… We’re nearing the femoral artery… Keep the light shining or I might accidentally nic it. Papyrus, hand me one of the rings.” Woah, serious Alphys was cool, especially with her just passing orders around like she was a doctor with a PhD. Well, technically she was, but not in surgery. 

Cool.

She quickly wrapped the ring tightly around the artery, but not tight enough to make it gather so much that it bursts. “Alright, strengthen the blade.” You watched that beneath Undyne’s eyepatch gathered blue, and the weapon in Alphys’ hand glowed somewhat brighter. “Cool…” You murmured in awe, and Undyne let out a chuckle. It took every bit of self restraint for her to not just prove she was stronger, but you appreciated her not doing so. This was a life or death situation, after all.

“You might feel this…” She started to dig through the bone, and it took everything in you not to shiver with such an odd sensation coursing through your body. Blood was coating the metal surface you were laid on, but that wasn’t even the problem. Surging magic against bone was a feeling you’d never thought you would encounter. It was like nails on a chalkboard, but through your entire body. It felt revolting, and you’d take pain over this any day.

“Stop,” you mumbled, apparently her not hearing. “Please stop.” You pleaded, and she immediately ceased anymore movement, an orange wave of magic swarming the ripped open parts of your legs to stop any unnecessary bleeding. “I hate to say this, and I know you’re being precautious, but you need to hurry. I’m starting to feel light headed.” It was the truth, and you couldn’t put it into simpler words. 

Your skin had visibly paled, it gaining a more ghoulish look more than usual. And, to be completely honest, you had never felt truly this tired. Maybe cutting off your legs was truly a bad idea. These monsters were inexperienced, right? Maybe they weren’t as good as you thought. “HUMAN! HUMAN, STAY WITH US!” Without realizing it, your eyes had dimmed of light, and your grip on Papyrus’ hand faltered.

Where’s Sans?

“Undyne, just chop them both off, don’t worry about the arteries. We can take care of that later.” She seemed to obey Alphys’ directions without even a second thought, slicing through your legs as if it were a hot knife to a stick of butter. Your entire body shivered, and you were brought back to temporary consciousness. Not that you’d fallen out of it, of course, but you were teetering on the edge of blacking out.

“Papyrus, fuse the skin. Undyne, grab the legs. JP, stay awake.” The sweat pouring its way down the crest of her head was like a mini waterfall, and deliriously, you laughed at the analogy. You couldn’t even notice the little things the lizard was mumbling constantly under her breath, about how she couldn’t afford to have another failure. Not again, not anymore. No more families could lose another.

What family? You had no family.

A fish and a skeleton were placed in front of you, the fish wriggling weak flesh away from its home, and the skeleton trying to fuse gushing blood vessels back to said home. Odd combo, really. With a sickening schlick, the legs were disjointed from your body, quickly thrown into a nearby bin that you could only wonder where they would be disposed of.

Alphys hurried over with the black legs in tow, and quickly helped them onto the table. “Undyne, help Papyrus.”

“But, I can’t do healing magic.” The look in Alphys’ eyes seemed to shut Undyne up though, and she tried to pump energy into the other skeleton, who was already sweating from overexertion. “Alright, I’m pulling out your soul.” She murmured, and you felt, if barely, that slight pull in your rib cage. “Dammit, it’s getting dim…” She slurred, trying her best not to completely break down.

Your vision was fading by the second, and you were slowly being dragged into that void of temporary nothingness. Seemed bleeding to death truly was your fate, and you realized this was all one big mistake.

Damn…

Hope just wasn’t your thing, and for you to play so hard on them was near unheard of. So when Alphys mumbled those words of 1 Hope Point, you weren’t shocked. You vaguely remembered Toriel mentioning something about how below average you were with your HP, so for it to be confirmed by a certified scientist, it seemed unsurprising. 

You could feel the overall tense atmosphere near crackling in the tight room, and Papyrus’ magic was fading by the second. “Hold in there big guy.” You grinned, trying your best to stay awake. But, by the gods, sleep sounded so nice right now. Maybe more than ever, but you were determined to stay awake ‘til you were safe. And, Alphys took notice of this, as your soul sheened a beautiful red color.

“Perfect! Keep that up.” She encouraged, the determination flow able to give her a stable link to your soul to keep this bond much more powerful than a simple physical connection. It was like the legs she constructed quite literally melted into your hips, causing you to let out a string of garbled noises. 

“Success!” She claimed, before collapsing to the floor with pure exhaustion, quickly joined by Undyne and Papyrus falling beside her. You grinned wide, and finally let yourself give into that pure fatigue that plagued your body.

The last thing you heard before falling unconscious was a call of your name.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> edit: I FORGOT TO MENTION GFKDMGKFD  
> I made a playlist for jp!! so if u want to listen to it and get a little bit of foreshadowing, feel free! [link](https://8tracks.com/soueikaku/let-s-go)


	18. Inebriated

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Taking a different approach, but probably not the most healthy one.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> god i love this chapter. i tried to be a little poetic in the beginning, and then it gets funner at the end. enjoy!  
> [tumblr](http://madjicks.tumblr.com)

A damp cloth rubbing gently against your face was good enough to stir you out of your blood loss induced slumber, and beautiful green eyes clashed with yours. “She’s awake!” They called, causing your eyes to break out of their cocoon of crust. Gross. The gasps that surrounded you made you felt self conscious, and before you could properly wake up, you were suffocated with hugs.

“Oh my god! We all thought you died, girly!” You laughed at Undyne’s brash assumption, and let your lips fall into a confident grin. “I ain’t that weak.” The remark seemed to have Undyne bristle, and she stared at you with newfound curiosity. But, she was quickly shoved away by an overly worried Papyrus, who rambled endlessly about how worried sick he’d been about you. 

“I REMEMBER YOU SLIPPING OUT OF CONSCIOUSNESS AND YOUR GRIP WEAKENING FROM MINE. IT WAS RATHER SCARY!” Woah, did you really faint? Before you could even try to remember what had truly happened, you were surrounded with even more hugs, but one seeming still absent, causing your face to fall.

“W-What’s wrong? Do your legs not work?” Alphys asked nervously, her claws clacking together. Oh geez, you’d completely forgot about why you were even surrounded by these monsters. With minor stress, you moved your legs, even if it was a bit hard to do. Probably from the muscles not having been used. It’s like you’re a baby all over again. “No, pretty sure they work stellar.” You tried to hide your disappointment, because it definitely wasn’t directed at Alphys in any way.

The tensity released quickly from her shoulders, and your heart only grew heavier. Where is he?

“WHO, HUMAN?” You didn’t even realize that you’d said that out loud, and your mouth fell even further. It was like your mouth was filled with cotton and disabled you from talking, and with a clearing of your throat, you tried to speak once more. “N-Nothing. Sorry.” 

Were you dreaming? Were you in the timeline where you’d murdered Sans in cold blood, or more, dust? It didn’t seem likely, but maybe Chara was finally making you repent for your foolish actions. But, all of this just didn’t add up. As you fell into somewhat of a trance, you were completely blind to Undyne’s sharklike grin.

“Someone’s lookin’ for shorty.” Her jab was directed towards you, but you were too far off to even register it. Where was he? He wasn’t put off by you, was he? The negative thoughts that plagued your mind were near drowning, and you desperately tried to build a mental dam to keep them away. “How long was I out?”

“A-About 3 days. I never knew anyone other than Sans could sleep  _ that _ long…” The name twinged within you once more, and you let out an awkward cough, desperately trying to keep yourself together. Why did you feel so drawn to him, anyways? “Ah, yeah, humans typically do that after major surgeries like this. Magic or not, it’s physical trauma in a way.” Thank god your brother is here, or else you might still be tripping over verbal branches.

“I see.” She responded, and was quickly distracted by science talk between her and Prescott. If anyone needed to be distracted, it was you, but you weren’t going to be selfish to the doctor who replaced your legs for free. That still seems fishy to you. Your eyebrows were furrowed, and your eyes looked intense to boot. To be completely honest, you were lost.

After breaking away from in depth conversation with the ghost, Alphys informed you that you were to be bedridden for a week or two. Surprising, since you expected it to take a lot longer for your body to heal. Seems magic works wonders, though, huh?

You were taken out of the lab by Papyrus; Undyne and Prescott hanging behind at Alphys lab for moral support. It was incredible how gentle someone as big as Papyrus could be with you, but you suspected it was because he wanted to make sure nothing wrong happened after your procedure. Being drudged along in his arms once more wasn’t exactly what you were looking forward to, but you would take what you could get.

The ride back was a lot faster than last time, and you still couldn’t shake the feeling that this was all wrong somehow. It just didn’t settle in your stomach properly, and you wondered if it was because the magic still dwelling in your system. Or, maybe it was a side effect of soul bonding. Who knows.

“I’M SORRY FOR RUSHING US BACK, BUT WE MUST RETURN SOON. IT IS QUITE LATE.” Still no mention of Sans, and less suspicion clouded your thoughts, instead being replaced by heavy amounts of worry. Was he avoiding you or something? Did you do something wrong?

Maybe he was trying to get back at you for killing him that one time, but he said there was a truce. He tried to kill you, you sort of killed him. That’s...A good deal right? Morally wrong, yes, but no matter what, you’d agreed to a truce. Second guesses plagued your brain once more, and you couldn’t help but want substances to drown them out.

“Do you guys have alcohol down here?” Your question was probably better to be directed at someone who wasn’t as innocent as Papyrus, but you knew he was an adult, so he was capable of supplying easy information such as that. “YES, BUT I WOULD ADVISE AGAINST GETTING WRAPPED UP IN IT IN YOUR CURRENT STATE.” Fair enough.

The ride home was, non shockingly, boring as all hell. Papyrus seemed tense as he carried you home, and you kind of wish everyone would stop treating you like some fragile piece of glass. Maybe that’s why you enjoyed Sans’ company so much, he didn’t see you as some dumb damsel who always needed rescuing.

But, you couldn’t shake the thought that something changed. 

You were now zoning out completely to try and make the time pass faster than it currently was, and before you knew it, you were back at the skeletons’ household. Was this place your mandatory home now? You wanted to move on from Snowdin, but it was almost like something was dire about keeping you here.

The thought that passed your mind made you squirm, and you put it out like a match. No point in thinking that way. A door slammed open, and you let out a sigh of relief at finally getting here. As sweet as Papyrus is, he is the complete opposite of comfortable. Not like you expected him to be, he was a  _ skeleton _ , for pete’s sake.

He took you up the stairs, not even giving you a single chance to try out your new limbs. All he spoke of was rest, and suddenly, you flared with anger. Why was everyone so worried about you? 

Jesus christ, your anger was probably from nicotine withdrawals. Wonder if they have that down here, too. Doubtful, though, since you hadn’t seen a single monster light one. For fucks sake, was there nothing down here? Maybe that’s why they wanted out so bad. 

Papyrus left you alone in his room, you bundled up burrito style in a checkerboarded comforter. You could practically die from cabin fever, constantly being locked up in living spaces playing on your already gathered agitation.

“hey.”

The voice completely made your anger smash to pieces, and you had never moved so fast before. “Sans!” You called, diving off the bed to hug the skeleton. It was funny seeing his eyes widen in shock before your hug assault, but the strained smile on his face told you something else was wrong.

Your hands were now on his shoulders, and you pushed yourself away from the hug. Eyes searching for any sign of where he’d been or what was wrong, they found their culprit. Even more sunken in eyesockets than usual, a strained smile, and a minor crack at the top of his skull.

“What…” Your words caught in your throat, before being silenced by a finger being placed to your lips. “don’t worry about me, tell me about you.” This caused your unneeded anger to rise again, and you tried to not let it flood your tone of voice. “I’m fine. What the hell happened?” 

His eyelights shifted from left to right, before he let out a sigh and significantly slumped. “i’ve been drinking heavy these past two days.” He seemed hesitant before continuing his sentence. “but, that’s really it.” The lie was so obvious it could kill someone if dishonesty had the ability to commit such acts, and you frowned at him thinking you were so easily fooled.

“Tell me the truth.” You demanded, and the way he somehow slumped underneath your grasp again was telling of how exhausted he truly was. “i’ve been worried about you.”

The simple sentence caused your cheeks to slowly warm, and you started at him with curiosity. Worry? For you? “But, why?”

“you’re our last hope for a future above. frisk ruined that ages ago.” You weren’t filled in completely on that whole ordeal, but you could piece together information you’d gathered over the past month or so to understand what he meant. “I feel like that’s not all of it, but I won’t push.” He seemed to relax at that simple statement, and you couldn’t help but revel in his presence alone. Even with him just nearby made you feel whole again, and it was something you wanted to talk about.

Yet, you couldn’t. Not without spilling something even you weren’t completely sure of. But, all you could really do was enjoy this situation of simple physical affections. He was cradled in your arms, enveloping the warmth of your body, while you fawned over how perfectly he fit with you. Maybe fate brought the two of you together, but your negative mind couldn’t help but fight the philosophers explanation.

Fate, god, afterlife, they weren’t your cup of tea. So, for something like fate playing into the equation, made an unknown variable add to your situation. But, the way he was snuggled into you and dipping in between the stages of consciousness and not, made you relieve of your worries, and simply focus on keeping this small skeleton happy. “So, I got the surgery done.”

“i heard.” He joked dryly, and you huffed a small laugh. “I was wondering if maybe we could go to Grillby’s when I build up my muscle mass again. Maybe try out the new circuits.” Your dirty mind made it go other places, but you quickly shook away such thoughts.

Sans simply mumbled something incoherent in response, and the warm smile that graced your face was telling of your feelings about him. Something platonic, you hope beyond belief, but your interactions felt like something deeper. And, that was what irked you. It didn’t feel right, but it did, as much as you didn’t want to admit to it.

For some odd reason, you’d ignored these thoughts over the past month, but now, holding him gently in your arms like this, the thoughts had flourished once more. It made your chest feel warm, and you couldn’t help the warmth that speckled your ears. “Are you tired?”

He nodded his skull, and burrowed deeper into your sweater covered stomach, and you couldn’t stop the bashful laughter that breached your lips. “Alright, sleepybones. Do you want me to tuck you in?” He remained silent, and the only thing to notify you that he was still breathing were soft snores. You smiled warmly at his antics, and carefully lifted him off the ground. No point in trying to stand yet, so you lifted him up while on your knees. 

Gently placing him on the edge of the bed, you pushed yourself off the ground, reigniting slight pain in your lower back. Well, at least that certified your pain sensors worked still. With a grunt, you slowly pushed him further to the center of the bed, and wrapped the blankets around his body. You could only hope that he would get the sleep he so desperately needed.

Now… The only thing forefront in your mind was the want for alcohol. With Papyrus and his brother knocked cold, you could easily slip out of the house and head to Grillby’s. A test run, per say. 

You exited the room with a soft click of the door shutting close, and you tiptoed down the stairs, hoping you wouldn’t wake anyone with the squeal of creaky boards beneath you. You let out a relieved sigh when you’d successfully slipped out the door. Of course, you made sure to snag the scarf off the side of the couch to give you some guise of warmth, whether it be minimal or not.

It was nice to simply wander unattended, taking in the sights around you. Snowdin was still beautiful during nighttime, and you made sure to engrain every little detail in your photographic memory. The lights wrapped around the bristles of the Christmas tree, the centerpiece of this winter wonderland, somewhat dim, but still reigning beauty nonetheless. They gave the white area a stunning yellow aura, making the snow turn a different color completely; the ice crystals glittered with neon blue and yellow. A splendid mix.

Now there was Grillby’s, the bar that gave the town a completely different type of glow. Sure, Snowdin seemed rather friendly, but the settlement always seemed to root that family aspect to its core. It alone gave the area new splashes of color, red and orange now adding to the collage of yellow and white.

As you approached the building, you were met with a slight pang of regret. This place didn’t feel the same as when you were with Sans, but whenever you two were here, it always ended somewhat badly. Maybe this time it can be more enjoyed via solitude. Your regrets quickly diminished, and you pushed through the bar doors with newfound determination.

Everyone at the bar seemed to be familiarized with you, so there were nothing but little calls of greeting and small talk. Normally, they would’ve greeted Sans in the same fashion, but since he wasn’t here along with you, their focus had shifted to you instead. It felt really nice, to be fair. 

You sat yourself down at the bar, the usual stool almost feeling accepting of your butt sitting down in it again. Everything felt familiar, which was always your favorite. New things made you feel uneasy and apprehensive. Grillby greeted you with a curt nod, and you gently waved back. “Hey, sorry for not bringing Sans.” He seemed to laugh at your not so apologetic apology, and you knew from his slight crackles of yellow fire that he would take it in jest. “Do you, by any chance, have the ingredients for a strawberry daiquiri?” You weren’t here to exactly get drunk, but a little buzz couldn’t hurt.

To your surprise, Grillby nodded, and quickly turned his back to you. It always fascinated you to watch bartenders mix a drink, but the care he put into this simple glass was downright charming. He seemed to vigorously put it together, passion clear within his movements. The way his flames licked along his long dives seemed to give the entire act somewhat of an impression of dance, and you watched, completely enamoured by his body language.

You definitely wouldn’t put this on a tab, and you already had some money with you. The amount of effort he put into it alone made you feel almost obligated to tip him in some way. “Wow.” You simply mumbled, staring with wide eyes at the glass in front of you. Even the glass seemed to give off regality, the glass crystallized, shimmering in the low bar lights.

“Thanks, Grillbz.” He nodded at your satisfied thanks, and quickly amused himself by wiping at the counter that had a few splashes of rum on it. The wonder of if the rum was magic infused coursed through your mind, and you suddenly had the urge to find out the answer to such a question. With a sniff of your drink, you were wrapped in such a desire to sip it that you’d almost missed how Grillby was staring at you.

His face was blank, of course, but he was still more expressive than you would have ever truly expected. A brow was raised at how you were simply savouring your drinks aroma instead of taste, and you quickly hid your face in the drink. It tasted splendid, easily the best daiquiri you’d ever had. Whether it be the magic, or the pure love put into the drink, it was something to get your heavy weighted mind a tad tipsy. “Could I…” You paused, looking at the fire elemental with a slurred grin. “Another?” The missing of the word ‘have’ made you bust out into a fit of innocent giggles, and Grillby rolled his eyes, all in good fun.

Another drink was sat in front of you, this time being something called ‘Daiquiri Ice’. It had a blue tint to it, and shavings of ice softly floating atop the liquid. A bit more thin than your usual fruit daiquiri, but still looking delectable, nonetheless. Without even noticing, there was a small scoop of similar colored ice cream on the side, causing your mouth to melt with saliva alone.

“Oog…” You mumbled, tongue seeming too slow to accommodate your expression of desire towards such a simple beverage. The brain in your head seemed almost as if it were slowed, you never having gotten this drunk before from just one drink. You’d convinced yourself you were a heavyweight, but apparently not, according to monster liquor. Let’s just hope you didn’t accidentally shove yourself into blackout range of drunkness.

Sipping at the drink only made your mind feel foggy, but it was like a state of euphoria on top of it all. Jesus, getting drunk has  _ never _ felt this great, and with how nice monster alcohol made you feel, you could maybe slip into alcoholism.

Just kidding! You weren't that trashy, and even thinking the simple phrase made you somewhat snap back to the present, albeit still a bit off kilter. It was like you couldn’t control what poured out of your mouth. Poor Grillby, you’d be here tomorrow groveling to him and begging for forgiveness. Or maybe on your knees and doing something much more satisfactory.

A blush rested on your cheeks, whether it be from such lewd thoughts, or the haze of intoxication, you were careless towards either. Being drunk meant you let the more daring side of you break free, which also meant you were a lot more sexually inclined.

“So, Grillbz…” You grinned, nickname slipping off your tongue like honey. “You got a gill or,” hiccup, “what?” The look he sent you was to be expected, it being haphazardly thrown as a glare. For the second time you’ve ever heard his voice, it still had the remnants of charcoal you remembered. “I prefer men.” Three words, and you suddenly liked the guy even more. Gay bartender? Goals.

“Aw hell yeah… Gay people unite!” You yelled, drunken smile plastered on your face in genuinity. The weird thing was, is that you weren’t exactly passing, but dysphoria told you enough that you were a dude and guys were kickin’. 

“So, let me fix...” You giggled, eyes fluttering with the struggle of staying awake. “You got a dude to wrap ya arms around?” He curtly nodded, before slipping away from your presence to tend to one of the customers. Whatevs. 

The door in the distance dinged open, but you were too involved with torturing Grillby with overly invasive questions to take notice. Making people squirm was so much fun, and even though Grillby was far away, you were trying to paw at his flames, wondering if they’d burn you. They didn’t, though, and it was like just touching warm metal. Cool!

A deep baritone from far behind you made you near jump in excitement, and you flew off your stool to its source. “Sansy~!” You cooed, placing your hands on his cheeks and a smooch on his forehead. “My widdle Sansy!” His skull was ablaze with blue, flush dusting his cheekbones so heavily it was like an ocean of blush. “Aww, you’re so cute!” He peeled your hands off his face, and pushed himself through your overly intrusive body.

“never knew you were a happy drunk.” He mumbled distractedly, but you were too off in LaLaLand to really notice it. “I’m always happy when you’re around!” Your future self would eviscerate you for this next sentence alone, punishing you with jerks of your head against brick wall. God, you’re such a dumb bastard, but the alcohol got to you bad.  _ Really _ bad.

“You’re such a cute little skelly, I love you so much!”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> grEDNKFREJMKGMREDKLMGFDKLED


	19. Infidelity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Playing with the law.

Apoptygma Berzerk.

That was all you could truly think right now. Use songs to cope with one of your biggest mistakes down here. Life fucking sucked, and you were put back into Papyrus’ bed, with you staring brokenly at the wall.

_‘ But now a year has passed_

_And not a single word_

_And all the love she knew_

_Has disappeared out in the haze_  ‘

Fuck life. Fuck life so much, with all its useless twists and turns of regret and solemn. You felt trapped in this room, desperately begging to be let out, but Papyrus pleaded no. Not the answer you needed, nor wanted. He actually had the nerve to threaten you if you tried to escape. Even if it was an empty threat, it’s... It’s too much. It is too much.

You need out. You need _out_. You are going insane.

What the hell was his problem anyways? Your legs worked perfectly fine, demonstrated by your stumble home in negative twenty degree weather. The fuck did he care? Why did he care? Why did you care? Why? It was all repetition coursing through your mind. Fuck Papyrus. Fuck Sans. Fuck everyone.

Life was nauseating, and even if you were acting like a teenager throwing a tantrum, you could only tell yourself you _were_ a teenager. A teenager playing the role of a suicidal adult. An adult who just drunkenly confessed to a skeleton that they loved him.

Did you love him? It was doubtful. Could humans even love monsters? God, how would it even work? It’s so fucking stupid. All of this was stupid.

Your head thumped against the wall for the fifty seventh time today, you having counted every single one, and it was run bloody from the scratchy surface digging into it. Who cares. Even if you saw red and blood was all over your near broken glasses, you didn’t care. _Thump_ . _Thump_.

“can you not?” You heard through the walls, causing you to scoff and nail your head against it even harder. Fuck Sans. Go read a book, dick. If it wasn‘t for him, you‘d be fine. You wouldn‘t be here, constantly bashing your head against a wall. You‘d be out there having fun and probably on your way to Hotland. But, little skeleton bastard decided falling asleep on you was a good idea.

Ugh. You knew it wasn‘t his fault, but you were too angry to think rationally and take the blame yourself. Really, who would in your situation? You told a skeleton that you loved him, and not in the joking manner. Gross, gross, gross.

That‘s exactly what you are right now. Bloodied, clueless, and perhaps broken. Maybe you were in hell, this all being some psychological torture for your life of sin. Oh, fuck it, you were a living, walking sin, broken or not. Ugh. Ugh, ugh, ugh.

"do you need some help?" You heard through the wall once more, causing you to sigh in both exasperation and irritation. "Noo, not at all, Sans. Just go back to reading and leave me alone." You knew for a fact he was studying, even if he was denying such a fact. Stubborn ass skeleton. Go read some nerd shit…

But, to be honest, you desperately needed support, and from the guy inebriated you confessed to would just make it better. Totally better. Sunshine and rainbows! Lollipops, and all. Music. God, you wanted to punch the wall, but smashing your head against it seemed better. Another one to clash with the surface, causing the wall to shake and you to see stars.

“F-Fuck.” You mumbled, and still stuck in your concussion similar daze, you were completely oblivious to the door opening and a skeleton now at your sides. "you can‘t do this." You shook your head, and glared at the short figure now approaching your side. "You don‘t control me."

"it doesn‘t matter, idiot. you can‘t break your skull over some words." Like he would know. Wait, he might. He is a skeleton. Oh for fucks sake, stop mulling over your dumb thoughts like they actually matter. Newsflash, they don‘t.

It was like he looked into your eyes and saw your entire mental state, because suddenly you felt digits trying to loop through yours in some action of support. That feels nice.

No, no, it doesn‘t. Definitely not enjoying this. Right? You‘re not. You‘re not. It fit so perfectly. His hand. His hand fit so softly and perfectly in your hand, and you just couldn‘t shake the thought of this being wrong.

Your hand jerked away, and instead rested on your rock encrusted forehead. Hope that doesn‘t get infected… Simple dreams, knowing your luck, it will. Might get gangrene or something. Can Alphys just rip out your soul and make you into a robot? That‘d be nice. You could be an emotionless hunk of metal.

“stop it, dammit.” Sans growled, staring at you with defiant eyes. “Why should I? You’re not the only one who’s allowed to sulk around.” That seemed to hit a nerve, making you shudder with regret. Definitely not the right approach.

“because even if you were drunk, i have to tell you something.” Your heart fluttered at the unknowingly tender statement, and your eyes avoided contact with his. They couldn’t bare to see the emotions swimming in those little slits of white. God, they were so beautiful. Who knew something so simple could be so pretty? Maybe it was the way they glowed, how they showed so much emotion, even if they were just pin pricks of blank space? Either way, you felt so drawn to stare at them, yet you completely ignored their prying ways.

“we’re…” His voice caught in his throat (?), and he fumbled with his hands. Seems this wasn’t going the way he planned. You near forced yourself to face with your back towards him, trying to block out those words so close to come. Knowledge was the last thing you needed right now. Self-abuse and mulling and sulking was currently more your forté than anything.

“fuck it.” He grumbled all too suddenly, taking your attention away from the too interesting carpet in the corner of Papyrus’ room. “not right now. not _yet_. not the way you are right now.”

No. No, you can’t just do that. You can’t just lead someone on like that, and then rip it away like a band-aid. What the fuck? You can’t fucking do that. “No. Get back!” You called, but it was too late. The door slammed behind the skeleton, and you suddenly felt more broken than you ever had down here.

“I’m sorry…” You whispered, staring down at your hands. Why were you this way? You were so close to finally discovering the truth, and your childish mind ruined that chance. Why? Why did you have to be this way?

It was so disgusting. You were so disgusting. Why couldn’t just be a normal human being? Why did you have to be littered with constant reminders of your fuckups? Voices from downstairs alerted your attention, and you quietly slipped onto the carpet, ears dug as far as you could into it.

. _..can’t. she wouldn’t understand…_

_...WHY NOT? SURELY SHE’S CAPABLE OF UNDERSTANDING SUCH THE FEEBLE CONCEPT OF…_

_...not..._

God, the voices were so broken and hesitant to even properly hear. Straining your ears this hard to hear a contextless conversation only made your heart beat even faster. What was going on? Why were they so ridiculously secretive towards only you? Or, were they like this with everyone?

_‘_ _ He had the saddest eyes _

_ The girl had ever seen _

_ He used to cry some nights _

_ As though he lived a dream  _ _‘_

Get out. Get out.

_' And now the years have passed_

_With not a single word_

_But there is only one thing left_

_I know for sure_

_She won't see his face again_ _'_

Stop it. No. Not again. You can’t do this again.

You can’t. You will die of a broken heart. It was too much, and you couldn’t help the tears that broke through your tightly closed lids, like a water dam pushing back more water than it could hold. Like a river over a waterfall, all of it descending into a basin of polluted, mistreated, renewable resource.

Something inside you died. Something inside you broke. Something inside of you vanished.

Footsteps were loud in your ears, sounding like a bass drum being hit to an unsteady rhythm. Not ¾… Not ⅝… Definitely not your average four four beat. Sporadic. Not musical. Not serene.

Horrible. That’s all it was. _Thump thump_. Screams. Dragging feet. Feet. Paws. Paws?

“Where is he?” Was all you could hear, panting breaths filling your now tuned ears. For some reason, it was like you were hallucinating. Giant dogs in suits of armor. Your mind was running a mile a minute. What are these creatures? Are they monsters?

“Our deepest apologies, Mr. Serif, but your brother, Sans Serif, is under arrest for tax evasion.”

WHAT?

Your stupor was wafted away by such a statement, and you jumped off your knees that were embedded in the carpet and looked the previously thought hallucinations in the eye. “I heard that, right? I’m not going crazy, right?”

The look in Papyrus’ eyes’ simply told you that this was something that had happened before, that Sans wasn’t one to really follow the law. “That son of a bitch lied to me.”

He played your heart.

 

* * *

 

To be fair, if Sans did have a beating heart, it probably would have shattered through his rib cage and fallen out of his shirt, by now. Running from the law was something he was much too familiar with, and for him to be doing it right now was almost exorbitant. He knew this was coming, it was the reason for his stressing and alcohol abuse these past few days. Not you. Or, at least, that’s what he told himself.

For fucks sake, what else was going to happen? You had abandoned him near completely after some stupid fucking slip up, and sadly, he had to delay his explanation of what was going on to run away from the Royal Guard. Dumb fucking dogs, always digging their overly curious nose in business they don’t belong to.

But, this time, it wasn’t a simple fine. It was actual arrest, since he was unable to provide taxes on the house for the past two years. Sorry, but depression and little hope of surviving even a day kind of puts proper responsibilities out of your mind. As he knew, since Frisk, little mixx know it all, decided to truly fuck over his life.

And, now, he was fleeing the law. The fucking law, the people he literally worked for. Maybe he could get Undyne to lift the arrest, or perhaps Asgore, or maybe even Toriel, but they were all doubtful. Way too many variables to add to such an already complex formula. The only person he could hide with would be Alphys, but that meant rooming with Amalgamates. Not his idea of fun, trust him.

Even though he was currently wrapped up in legal issues, all his dumb soul could focus on was the way you looked at him. Even if drunk, you confessed his biggest fear to him, whether blindly inebriated or not, it meant something. Something horrible.

He could already feel himself warming up to you, soul throbbing in pain from being so far away, and he despised it. He could not risk trusting anyone with anything, let alone such fragile...love. Not LOVE, not at all.

He was too much of an empty shell to embrace such a strong feeling with prowess, and for him to meet someone important to him was life changing. More for the negative, because everytime he woke up and saw you on the couch, sleeping away the night, he had to let out the biggest sigh of relief. All he could think about was when Frisk would reset next.

Maybe that would be better. This timeline was so overwhelmingly stressful it had almost put him over the edge too many times. Frisk coming back with their rampage or fake kindness would practically be a godsend at this point. He didn’t want a soulmate. He didn’t want you.

But, his soul told him he did. No matter how many times he tried to compress it and store it away, you were always on his mind. And, last night just made it all worse. All he could think about was how your lips pressed against his forehead in a drunken kiss, the smell of rum fresh on your breath. Your lips were soft against his frontal bone, and he couldn’t make it vanish from his head.

He wanted you to do it again, but it was too much of a risk. You two could never be together, could never be two halves of a whole. Peas in a pod, nothing. He couldn’t risk someone else to steal his love away and reverse it like it was nothing. He could barely even love Papyrus anymore, all these resets having torn that heartstring to shreds.

What could he do in the first place? He always played the role of jokester and apathetic, but it wasn’t true. He was observant, his eyes everywhere they could lay. And, with you plaguing his mind, his role as watchdog had flushed down the drain. He dreamed of you, thought of you, spoke of you. Why did you have to fall?

And for such a saddening reason? He knew, and understood, how much you wanted to die. It seemed like your first thought for every situation, to bring your life to a permanent end. It didn’t help how horrible of a condition your soul was in either. It was like a document taped and glued back together, never retaining its original form. You were so broken, and it made his own soul hurt. What cycle of events caused such a thing to happen? It couldn’t have been only one, no soul breaking apart so simply from one event.

Could he maybe… fix you? In any way? Was there even a way to fix a soul? It seemed impossible, but Sans was patient. That was his soul trait after all, and if you mixed it with a dominantly determined soul, it could bring beauty.

He was so wrapped up in his mind that he couldn’t even hear the way a key was shoved in the lock of his door, and the knob clicked open with success. The figure peered through, and saw Sans deep in thought on an office chair.

“You cannot run forever, you know.” The voice brought him out of his solemn, and he instantly recognized it as belonging to his beloved brother. “o-oh, hey bro. didn’t know you knew about this place.”

“I know more than you seem to realize…” He looked on at his brothers messy state and let a frown spread across his jaw. “What has been going on? You have not been yourself as of late.”

His eyes flashed with worry. Had he not been covering up his steps well enough? Even his brother had taken notice, and that wasn’t a good thing. “well, running from the law is hard.”

“I already have that situated. I paid the amount _you_ should have done.” His tone was bitter, which made Sans internally wince. What was he even doing? His life had fallen apart, and he’d been blind to the effect it had on others he cared about.

“sorry.” He tried to make it sound genuine, but it came out flat. Fucking idiot. “Look, Sans. You can’t keep doing this. The human is clearly suffering the most from your actions, and as a monster who has knowledge of soulmates, you should know that this is not the way to approach it.” He paused, and looked away from his place on the doorframe. “It is not right. So, please, I am asking you to finally tell her the truth. She deserves it.” And with that, Papyrus exited what was supposed to be kept secret, and left Sans to mull over his options.

His brother wasn’t wrong, not in the least. He never was. Sans knew his brother was intelligent, but he always tried to keep him away from the dangers in the world. Which ended up with his brother dying countless times from naivety. God, he was a horrible brother. He kept him sheltered and clueless, desperately trying to keep the innocence he lost so long ago within him.

Ugh, he wiped his sleeves against his closed eyes, desperately trying to wipe away crippling fatigue. He needed to talk to you about all of this, but he also needed more time to mull it over. What if you were just… Nevermind, this isn’t the time for second guessing himself.

Time to tell you the truth, whether you liked it or not.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wrote this chapter mid mental breakdown so im sorry that its all over the place and super repetitive. this was going to be a scrapped chapter but i dont feel like pushing it away when i put so much effort into it.  
> [tumblr](http://madjicks.tumblr.com)


	20. Agriculture

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Farming tools.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> man FUCK this chapter. fuck this chapter. its so fucking stupid fuck this chapter
> 
> [tumblr](http://madjicks.tumblr.com)

Sans was settled in the room you were currently in, and you stared down at him from the top of the bed. Cluelessness was clear in your clouded, red dappled eyes, them searching all over for an explanation of what was actually going on. He was really lying to you, and even if you did know, you had hoped that feigning ignorance would prove the lies you told yourself true somehow.

What made him think lying to you was viable? It wasn’t like you would hurt him in anyway for telling some of the more personal things about himself to your jaded mind. Knowledge was desired in this tense situation, and now that you looked at it, all your situations with Sans were always so overwhelmingly tense.

Why, though?

“so…” He began, boned hands clinking together in melancholy. Seemed he was as nervous about this as you were, but you hid it a bit easier than he did. “what did you want to know?” The question nicced a strand of anger in your head, but all you could do was take a deep breath and try to calm yourself to his innocent playing words. “Everything.”

His eyes had widened with expected shock, but it did nothing to phase your current trepidation. You were not the one in the wrong here, he was. It wasn’t your issue if he had negative emotions littering his skull. “well, uh…” He hesitated, which caused the nic to transform into a scrape. His hand settled on the back of his vertebrae, your legs now bouncing in newfound frustration. Spit it out already!

“if you’re asking about the sudden royal guard visit, that was just my boondoggling. if you’re asking why we’re like magnets…” God, finally. Is he going to actually spit it out? Or, will he once again run away from the problem unlike the adult he claims to be. “you know about soulmates, right?”

Your heart slowed to a stop, and you stared at Sans with such a look on your face that instantly caused him to seize up. “You’re kidding.”

“i’m not.” He assured, causing you to tense even more than you believed was possible. So, soulmates weren’t just some odd myth that gypsies used? Jesus fucking christ. “We’re…” You paused, and unraveled the gathering knot in your throat. “We’re soulmates? That’s what you’re telling me.” It was more a rhetorical question than anything, but it still caused shock to course through your veins.

Apparently, said shock had coursed into the bowels of your stomach, causing you to lurch across the room to shove open the door. Gotta get to the bathroom. And quick. Sans was shouting something, but your ears simply couldn’t zone in on what he was saying. Bathroom.

When you finally reached your destination, you curled over the side of the tub, letting your nausea fly loose of its encasement. Oh boy, vomiting over the side of a bathtub brought back _splendid_ memories.

Normally, you would have emptied it all into the toilet bowl, but having two skeletons in the house meant no body waste to require use of one. Just your luck that your soulmate is a fucking skeleton.

Wow. You have a soulmate. Seems all the mumbo jumbo your ex girlfriend constantly spouted on about being soulmates was half truths, but still not right on the mark. Instead, your soulmate is a skeleton. A living, breathing, magic using skeleton. Who would’ve guessed? Maybe that’s why you’d only had a couple healthy relationships that never lasted long, because there was just no molecular bond to share affections over.

Thinking about your past love story simply made bile fly out of your mouth once more, causing you to choke on vomit and cough through the acidic substance you were much too familiar with. Ugh, that was rude, but the crazy admission of something like that was apparently enough to make your stomach flop like a fish out of water.

You dry heaved over the porcelaine surface for longer than you would like to admit, and were somewhat saddened to find the strands of your overly long hair coated in specs of throw-up. That was really disgusting, to be honest. Oh god, here it comes again… You would scrub the living hell out of this tub later on, but right now, your mind was constantly plagued with thoughts from such a bold statement.

Think of things...music. Think of music. Troy Donockley. Think of his beautiful flute and pipe playing. Oh god, just thinking about his beautiful melodies made you feel warm, and thankfully quelled the nausea, even if the effect was minimal. Think of Nemo. No, not the movie. The song you’d loved since you were little. Think of Tarja’s singing.

Nightwish, the ultimate cursed comfort for your weak soul. The one band that made you happy to go to concerts of, the one band that made you have even the slightest of love for your mother. Just breathe. Breathe in, breathe out. Grab the cup off the sink counter, sip water, and then scrub the tub. Grab the Soft Scrub from underneath the sink, grab the sponge. Run the bath, let it drain on its own.

You would not let this bathroom reek of disposed and digested food product. The smell would only make your stomach turn once more, and even thinking about it made you quiver. God, it’s so disgusting.

“HUMAN, ARE YOU ALRIGHT IN THERE?” Thank god the knock didn’t belong to the shorter skeleton, or else you would’ve reacted much worse than you would with Papyrus. “Y-Yeah, just threw up a bit.” The door opened slightly, and Papyrus peeked into the cramped bathroom, to find you digging through the cabinet.

“Human, don’t worry about it. I will take care of this, but please, go speak to my brother?” He hesitated before finishing his thought. “I believe he is crying…”

Oh. You made him cry? Well, damn. Kind of what he deserves though, right? But, your soul practically screamed at you that that was not the way to think in this predicament, and to instead go comfort him like he’d done for you so many times.

The door was still cracked open, and you slipped through the opening to the hallway. You could hear the muffled sobs echo through it, which made your heart sink farther within your torso. You didn’t know he would take it so hard, but it was like confessing your love to someone, only for them to throw up from the very thought alone. Boy, you were a pretty big asshole for that, huh.

Your blue eyes saddened at the thought of you causing the skeleton stress, because as much as you hated to admit it, fate had drawn the two of you together. Even if it took 20 years, maybe it was worth it to just cradle him as he broke down in your arms. He was so small, so gentle, so fragile. You felt near required to calm him, make him smile genuinely, and kiss his tears away so softly.

You entered the room with a pink blush across your cheeks, eyes soft with newfound care for the monster. He was sobbing into his hands, sucking in air every chance he could get. Seeing his face mold into such a depressing expression made your heart melt into a pool of sympathy and regret. And, to think that you caused this, it made your eyes water.

He wasn’t paying attention to anything around him, just neon blue tinted streams coating his cheekbones so beautifully. He was beautiful while he cried. His eyes were shut tight, tears coating his cheeks, hands cradled roughly around his mouth to muffle the sobs. Even if the scene was depressing, it looked like something directly out of a movie.

In this moment, you realized that his words are true. They are genuine, they are filled with more emotion than you could ever believe. Meeting your soulmate was something you’d never thought would be a reality, but here he is. Crying over an action you made towards such soft words of declaration. This was your fault. Not his faulty mistakes, but yours this time.

“Hey...Sh, sh...It’s alright, I’m here now.” You cooed, croning your arms around his shoulders, letting him cry into your chest. His hands were clenching the front of your sweater like a lifeline, polyester soaking up the tears laced upon them easily. “Let it out.” You mumbled, drifting your hand across the crown of his skull. So smooth, it was, and it made you blush happily.

He was mumbling something about not wanting this to end, and you took it the wrong way. But, all it did was make you cradle him tighter, desperately wanting to make this broken monster beautiful again. To make him smile, for you, for his family. To make those fake grins transform into divine twinkles along his eyesockets. To bring the corners of his mouth higher, even if it was a shit eating grin. Make him facetious, you would love him no matter what.

You love him.

God, you fucking hate this. Why’d life have to be this way? Why can’t you still be sitting up, relaxing on your fold-out couch up on the surface, preferably in the arms of your oh so warm boyfriend. Wait, you have a boyfriend. How would having a soulmate work? You can’t just cut something off you had worked so long to achieve like that. Oh my god, how were you going to do this? Maybe he forgot about you or something.

Sans was trying to snap you out of this self induced daze you’d quickly slipped into, waving his hand much too fast in front of your eyes. How will this work?  
“well...i’m unsure.” His eyes were uncertain. “all i know is that after heavy evaluation, this is our situation.” You hated when words slipped out of your mind out into the air, but whatever. “Yeah, seems so.” The words came out a bit more blunt than you intended, but what was to be expected? You were at a loss for words for now, so for any to breach that cage in your vocal cords said a lot.

The atmosphere grew tense, almost as if it were filled to the very brim with static charge. The air crackled metaphorically, and it near hurt to even be still here. Holding a skeleton gently in your grasp, arms draped over his body like a pair of sheets. Bad metaphor, since he was considered to be the undead by human standards.

Your chin nestled into the top of his skull, it fitting near perfectly. He hummed at the new contact, and you harmonized with his simple melodies. What was there to do now? You’d achieved so many things down here, the Underground, as a whole. Met godlike deities who were simply children, met skeletons, discovered one of said skeletons is your soulmate, gaining robotic legs.

Wow, what a mouthful. You’d seen and recieved things many of your race dreamed of acquiring, and for some odd reason, that made you feel almost special.

“what’s on your mind?” Sans asked, adjusting himself to regain comfortability within your cradle. “What a loaded question.” The joke fell flat, and you chuckled just as dry. “Dunno, lotsa things, I guess.” Your grasp on him tightened, and the choked little sound he let out made you snigger. The way he squirmed in your arms made you loosen your near bear hug around his ribcage, and he quickly slipped away. Not gonna lie, but him not being in your arms was rather disappointing.

“Mama bear scare ya?” He looked away, and dragged his hand slowly down his temple. “nah, just.” He shook his head, almost as if to clear his thoughts. “‘s nothin’.” Okay.

“Well, I uh. I need to get going. Waterfall is calling.”

“okay.”

His response was so disgustingly blunt, it near made your skin crawl. Wow, bud, one minute you’re crying, the next minute, you’re all numb again? Well, guess it makes sense. You were the same way after a mental breakdown. Usually just… Lasted longer, though.

You swiped your sleeve across your forehead, the fabric dampening with perspiration. The Waterfall mention was more of an excuse, but it was the truth. You wanted out of there as soon as possible, and not bringing up your inevitable escape was just not possible. Needing out of here was the biggest on your list of priorities.

A sigh escaped your lips, and you truly did feel exhausted. You weren’t one for consoling others, so for him to just break down and Papyrus to expect you to comfort him, it was rather annoying. Soulmates or not, it didn’t matter. Just because you were able to properly hold yourself in a situation of becoming an amputee did not mean you were good in a situation of sadness.

Not your cup of tea, per say.

You quickly slinked down the stairs, hand laying just slightly on the railing, enjoying the texture underneath your slightly damp palms. Skeleton tears were so weird, leaving a little glow to your hands. It was like you had magic.

Your fingers danced along the polished wood surface, a small smile breaching your face. Just push the previous situation out of your mind, and everything will be fine.

You snatched the red scarf off of the hat stand near the door, and with a bit of pondering, you opened the closet to slip out someone’s signature hoodie. Hope he doesn’t need it, but you needed it a lot more than his boney ass. It was a tight fit, almost like a crop-coat on you, but it was the best you could get.

Long, baggy black pants, a crop coat, a long scarf, and white sweater would never be your sense of style, but down here, it wasn’t like anyone would criticize you for it. For that you were relatively thankful, a sigh once more escaping your mouth.

“Alright, just gotta slip into Waterfall, try to avoid any sentries…” Ugh, that might prove to be difficult, since Sans’ station was _right there_ at the entrance of the water laden area. Let’s just hope in his current depressed state that he doesn’t go to work for the day. That would fuck up your plans completely. No Grillby dates anytime soon, whether he desperately wanted it or not.

God, you placed a hand to right above your eyes in complacency. What were you doing? Well, it did feel somewhat like you were entrapped in that household, so to be let out into fresh air without the intent to drink was a blessing.

Trampling through the thick sheets of snow like some new dog, you hoped beyond belief that the circuits in your legs wouldn’t short out, but since they had a thin cover of black leather covered over them to prevent said situation from happening, which made you thankful for Alphys’ handiwork. Oh, that reminds you. Giving her a call of gratitude would probably prove to be good.

Fumbling with the deep crevices known as your pockets, you finally slipped the phone out, touching it with reddened fingers from the cold. You pecked in her phone number, probably the most daint thing you had ever successfully done. The phone rung and buzz about four times before she finally picked up, which made you sigh in relief. “Hey, what’s up, girly?”

“O-oh, hey! Nothing much… What’s with the sudden call?” The smile on your face was near blinding as you treaded along the path to Waterfall. “Sort of just wanted someone other than skeletons to chat with. Also, I’m on my way through Waterfall! I can visit tomorrow, if that’s good with you.”

The flustered noises she made through the phone made your grin grow ever larger, and a small chuckle was suppressed in the back of your throat. “O-Oh! That sounds great! I’m free tomorrow, thankfully…” You heard the clicking of keyboard buttons in the background, causing you to laugh quietly. “Whatcha workin’ on?”

“Prescott’s new body… It’s proving to be a bit of a challenge since his soul is rather weak, b-but, I’m sure I can do it!” Her confidence was charming, and suddenly you were flooded with a wave of affection for the small monster. “Sounds kickin’. What color?”

“Green, by his request. Seems ghosts like their bodies to match their soul aura.” Woah, how intricate were souls, exactly? That’s all you heard about down here. Guess Flowey saying something about them being the culmination of your entire being was a statement, not just something to scare you off. Man, you hadn’t seen the bastard in a while. Wonder where he’s lurking.

“Hey, sorry to curb off topic, but have you seen this like…” Your hands mulled around eachother as you entered the catacomb of dripping luminescence, chatting on your phone like some young teenager to their best friend. “This talking flower? He was ‘bout yee high.” You cursed under your breath as you realized Alphys could indeed _not_ see you, and mentioned something around the range of 30cm.

Her silence was deafening.

 


	21. Robotics

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An unexpected guest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [tumblr](http://madjicks.tumblr.com)

The way the line went silent and then ended with a click made you near shiver, and you couldn’t help but worry. Why had such a topic cause such a reaction? Staring at your phone to make sure you weren’t just hearing things, it indeed did prove to you that Alphys had hung up. Well, damn.  
Guess there won’t be any chitchat as you traversed through Waterfall. As you entered the cave, you by habit checked the sentry station stored in the corner, biting the small flesh of your cheek when it turned up empty. Okay. And, now you were just realizing, that between the usually populated area, there had been a small twinkle. You dug through your memories, only to find that you had seen something like this before, but way back in the Ruins. How had you passed over this your first few times through here?

  
Oh, right, you had worse things to worry about every time you’d come through here. You lightly waved your hand to the sparkle, reveling in its fluorescent warmth.

JP LV 1 2381:56  
Waterfall - Checkpoint  
SAVE?

You pressed against the button, it flashing a dim yellow and fading away. You still wondered constantly what that all meant, but you still hadn’t figured it out with all your time down here. Maybe something for you to mull over while you’re going through the worn paths of Waterfall.  
Speaking of Waterfall, the place was as beautiful as you remembered, and this time, you could properly take in its beauty without running for your life or being toted around by an overly exuberant skeleton.

  
The entire area was misty, giving the crystals above you a beautiful glow that reflected on the water vapor. Flowers were scattered around the premises, all whispering childish secrets to any and all open ears. Many of them were innocent and young fantasies, such as wishing to be a superhero, or just bantering with a sibling. It was all very soothing, giving you some on reminiscence of home. Thinking of home made you sad, though, especially since many of these children had wishes of breaching the barrier and seeing the surface. It made you feel almost remorseful for taking what you had for granted, finding an entrapped species and being their only hope for freedom.  
Your eyes filmed over with a slight bit of red, and a determined grin breached your downcast face. Getting these monsters free was the biggest goal you’d ever tried to reach, but you knew for a fact you would not back out on this promise.

  
“I see you’ve taken interest in the Echoflowers.” A voice shocked you out of your daze, and you spun around, only to make eye contact with a different type of flower. “Oh, hey, where’ve you been?”

“Oh, you know. Skittering through the Underground like a monster would.” The way he emphasized the word monster made your lips tighten. What was he even implying? “Well, you’re not wrong.” You huffed, hands slipping into the hoodie pockets of the one you had stolen. More borrowed, than anything. “What’s your reason for greeting me all of a sudden?”

Your expression was blank as a newly cleared chalkboard as his curled into one that was significantly uglier. “Checking up on you. Needed to make sure you didn’t get too wrapped up in smiley trashbag’s tricks.”

“And what’s that supposed to mean?”

“Figure it out.” With that, Flowey had disappeared into the dull blue ground once more, causing your eyebrows to furrow at the way he fled constantly. Maybe he was a child, but you just couldn’t put your finger on his identity. All you knew was that he had made Alphys go silent, which made your skin crawl with uneasiness. This time, you had taken notice of his unkempt appearance, and it only made your turmoil increase by tenfold.

It felt nice to finally have the ease of slipping your hands into pockets, even if they were a bit high on your torso. But, there’s no complaining here, you were thankful for anything at this point. The red scarf around your neck fluttered in some imaginary wind, and you smiled gently at the reminder of who these accessories belonged to. Two skeletons who cared about your well being, even if it was a bit too much at times. Your eyes slipped closed for just a moment, taking in the environment around you with a more mature outlook than you’d ever felt down here.

The small breeze settled onto your skin, dancing across it like a set of prima ballerinas. Howling of the wind set your mind aflutter, bringing you a peace you’d never thought you’d achieve. A soft smile was on your face, various strands of orange littering your fattened cheeks. It all felt so nice, your glasses light on the bridge of your mangled nose, the bags under your eyes almost lifted with somewhat more tame sleep than your time on the surface. Everything felt at peace, and you were planning to absorb it all with just a few minutes of standstill.

Chimes hidden within the cores of Echoflowers only made the setting more serene, blue glow enlightening you to even more beautiful views. The water was light, small bits of dew trailing above its luminescent surface. Hums of passersby of long past added to the atmosphere, your nose filled with fresh, humid air. Your hands slipped out of your pockets, gently letting them be free of their fabric encasement. They absorbed the cool air, shaking with non calmed, yet unknown to the eye, nerves.

You finally let your eyes open, taking in the scene around you. It was beautiful, but sometimes you just have to let it sink into your body without the sense of sight. Letting nature take its course through your sunken in body let it reinvigorate once more, hibernated feelings fluttering to the surface like newly birthed dolphins. Jumping past the barrier of water, into the blessing of light, basking in its reverie.

With solemn, you declared through soft lips that you have to move on. Even if Waterfall was the most beautiful area you had ever laid eyes upon, it was time to continue your journey to Alphys’ lab. At this moment, you realized that you were finally relaxed completely. No social situations to plague you, no ramped up anxiety, or disabled legs. No overwhelming emotion of reignited grief, none. You simply felt pure, near glowing with the soft color of green.

You trailed along once more, resuming your trek down the flowered, well walked path. The dirt that had been cleared was dappled with various footprints, claws, paws, shoes, you name it, it was there. It was rather endearing, knowing you were simply adding to this path’s long history. With a smile and slightly flushed cheeks, you let your hands fall to your sides, slipping along with every bob of your legs. It was amusing how they slightly clinked together, metallic noises being produced ever so quietly. The soft ticking of gears within your lower body gave you a sporadic rhythm to walk along to, and your hands now fiddled with each other.

Not from nervosity, but more out of simple habit. It felt better to have something to do with your hands, whether it meant toying around with both of them or not. You thought of mandalins, plucking along to make a beautiful warm rhythm to soothe the soul. Bits and pieces of piano and tympany behind their beautiful, in tune melody. Pluck, pluck, pluck, their strings vibrating against wood to produce a beautiful music. Then flute would join in, jostling along with accents and shorts that wouldn’t sound good from a non professional, but out of trained lips, resembled true beauty.

This place was enchanting, it giving you the remnants of innocence long lost. If there was a heaven, you wished it would be varied with complementing blues, mixing together to create a sea of indigos and teals, just like how it was here. “Beautiful.” You whispered, voice carrying along the land, adding along to the environment of already treasured whispers of hope. Your footsteps now slipped along with practiced ease, clamping onto the ground in time of the ticks within your calves.

“Beauty.” You echoed, altering the previous statement by a meer four letters. Even so, it still accentuated the meaning behind the word. Blue eyes were glassy in the caverns of your face, reflecting the various colors slipping through the cracks of your soul, even if they had slowly, minisculely, been healing under another's touch. Life was beautiful, and you were glad you could take in its unwavering opulence.

Eventually you reached yet another cavern, one you remembered as the place you returned to after dusting Sans. Your relaxed demeanor wavered slightly, you desperately clawing at it to return. It made you feel so mature, like you should be, but now it was slipping away at the sudden memory. Your resistance proved futile, though, and you were now left to wander without poetic descriptions entrancing your mind. It felt so empty now, and sadness clasped its cold digits around your heart, causing you to let out a shudder.

This didn’t feel good, and you were now just dragged into the horrible nostalgia known as your memories. Hands slipped into your pockets one more, a tick of yours when your emotions were slipping. No, please stop. With sad eyes now present, you let them rest on the teetering bridge present a ways front of you, sighs breaching your now chapped lips. The heat from the end of the caverned was crisp, it burning anything that had the chance to breach its ugly snarl.

Your hand slipped across your head, other hand now wrapped tightly around the brittle ropes tied to the sides of wooden slats. Sweat glistened across the dorsal of your hand, and your eyes now clenched with uncertainty. What if the bridge broke and you plummeted into magic surged lava? Would it kill you?

It seemed likely, since it still emanated disgusting amounts of sticky warmth. The lava bubbled and burst, waves of thick molten rock sloshing around in its pool. Now, you remembered that you should probably not continue to look down, and you, against your will, drug your head upwards. Jeez, you were going to sweat away every bit of hydration in your body from this unrelenting heat. It was like a desert, but somehow worse. Since there was no sense of day and night, or more, no sun and moon, it wasn’t like this area would cool like a desert. Guess “Hotland” was living up to its name.

You’d have to ask someone who came up with these oh so wonderful names.

What was it like to live in a terrain like this? Constantly being surrounded with drowning amounts of magma, edges of rocks cracking and falling into its much too willing grasp? You couldn’t even fathom it, always been more of a fan of colder climates, or even, more moderate temperatures. Something akin to Waterfall’s, but less damp, basically.

You’d finally made it across the bridge, and made it to an intersection you’d never taken notice of before. The one to your right led to the River Person, and you couldn’t help but wonder why the skelebros decided to run through Waterfall when they were right here. Probably Papyrus or Undyne’s idea, but still. To your left was a cyan force field, humming with magic. And, to your front, was Alphy’s hunk of metal known as her lab. Jeez, it was garish against the red accents of Hotland.

Thankfully, you didn’t need to cross anymore bridges to get to the door to said Lab, so you quietly wrapped your knuckles against the steel doors. Not that good of an idea, but it didn’t seem to float your head at the moment. When you were met with no response, said thought decided to grace you now as opposed to earlier on. Switching from knuckles to the blunt side of your hand, you bashed against the door, causing the metal to ring and actually alert anyone inside of your presence.

The doors slipped open, and you weren’t met with the small yellow lizard you were buddies with, but actually, a rectangular monster who shone in the harsh lighting of outside. “Oh, hey, Mettaton.” You had never met him personally, but you’d known him from your TV sessions with Sans and Papyrus. The way his lights flashed in recognition of his name made you frown, and you were reminded of your disliking of the robot. “HOW DO YOU KNOW MY NAME?”

His voice was as grating as it was on screen, and you couldn’t help the cringe that traveled your body. Your hands grasped at the fluffy fabric in your pockets, and you grit your teeth. “TV.” Simple answer, but sadly, you were now being assaulted with chatter of ‘MEETING ONE OF HIS MANY BELOVED FANS’ and it was almost like you could stick out your tongue in distaste. Honestly, this could probably be the only monster you couldn’t tolerate for long amounts of time. Your hand was snatched from your pocket, and you were swung into the lab, hand clutched with a death grip as if not to let you escape. Feeling your bones relocate in your hand was mildly terrifying, but so was the thought of being reminded that you indeed have a skeleton inside you.

Oh, shut up.

“IT TRULY IS MARVELOUS TO MEET A FAN, SOMETHING YOU COULD NEVER UNDERSTAND AS A PUNY HUMAN! BUT, WHAT BRINGS YOU HERE?” Ugh! His voice was like rubbing metal on a cheese grater, and you had to clamp your free hand over your mouth to prevent a pained noise to escape it. You groaned out a noise that oddly resembled something along the lines of ‘Alphys’, and you easily took notice of Mettaton’s distaste. “SHE’S GONE AND VISITED THE KING TO DISCUSS CERTAIN THINGS, BUT, I’M SURE I CAN KEEP YOU ENTERTAINED UNTIL SHE RETURNS?”

Your eyes bulged, and almost felt nauseated with how self absorbed he was. You always hoped it was simply an on-air persona, but apparently, you were very far off from the truth. Somehow, you were still trying to convince yourself of such a lie, digging for any relief from this death gripped chunk of metal. “I’m uh,” you paused, before your lips crumpled,”I’m sure I’ll be fine.” Anything to get this thing away from you, and preferably never being involved in your life ever again.

Wait, he was only wearing a towel around the top of his head. Was he showering? How does a robot even shower without short circuiting? “IT IS NO WORRIES, MY DEAR! YOU CAN BE THE NEWEST CONTESTANT ON MY NEWEST SHOW!” The lights in the room went dark, and you violently shaked Mettaton’s hand off of yours. “COOKING WITH A KILLER ROBOT!”

The grinding of a chainsaw made the suppressed shiver in the bottoms of your body surface, making you gulp down now gathered anxiety. You did not like the sound of a show like that, and you were suddenly reminded you were indeed human, and you had a soul that these monsters wanted. The lights flickered back on once more, Mettaton now wearing a chef’s hat and light blue apron, a small pink heart centered on the front pocket. The chainsaw was still rather visible, since it was gripped in his hands with practiced ease. If screens with too expressive lights could kill, you would’ve already been severed in half, chainsaw being proven unneeded.

“C-Can we n—“

“IT IS ME, YOUR BELOVED HOST, METTATON! TODAY, WE HAVE OUR SPECIAL GUEST, A HUMAN!” Cheering came from out of nowhere, but it sounded recorded; your eyebrows knitted together in well deserved confusion. You hadn’t even realized it, but the whirring of the chainsaw had come to an end, it now being placed quietly underneath the table being used to cook. You decided to play along, wondering that if you did, you wouldn’t be murdered in cold blood. “W-What are we making?”

“I AM SO GLAD YOU ASKED! TODAY WE ARE MAKING…!” His fingers pawed through a cookbook, and finally, one pressed all too excitedly against a page. “ONE OF THE MOST SIMPLEST OF DELIGHTS, A CAKE!” Well, that was easy enough. Pretty sure you could rattle off the recipe with ease, since it was such a famous dessert for celebrations and what not. Within seconds, the ingredients were scattered around the kitchen, and your frown only increased.

“NOW, MY DEAR, PLEASE GO AROUND AND LOCATE THE INGREDIENTS IN THE KITCHEN FOR ME!” It was less of a request, more of a demand than anything, and you decided that just accepting it and doing so couldn’t hurt anybody. You stumbled around the kitchen, eventually gathering eggs, flour, milk, a whisk, a bowl, and other various things. When you rushed back to the counter with overflowing arms of ingredients, you took notice of Mettaton’s fingers resting ever so slightly on the handle of his chainsaw.

You set all the ingredients on the counter, rushing to organize them into a non bristled manner, and then let yourself gasp for air. Mettaton’s lower screen corners curled upwards, and you could only guess that was the way he emoted seminormally. “SPLENDID! NOW, FOR OUR ABSOLUTE LAST INGREDIENT…” His hand now slipped into the crook of the handle, picking it up fluidly. “ **A HUMAN SOUL**.” Without even a second to hesitate, he encroached on you, before a phone ring broke through the air with almost perfect timing. It was funny watching Mettaton scowl at the noise, but you quickly slipped the device out of your pocket. A smile broke your face as you recognized the voice.

“HUMAN! WHEN DID YOU ESCAPE OUR HOUSE AND GET TO HOTLAND ALREADY?” Not the topic you were fond of discussing at the moment, but since Papyrus was such an avid viewer of Mettaton’s shows, you could only guess that he did this so you didn’t have the opportunity to become minced meat. “Ohh, you know me. Always running off!” The nervous laugh at the end really proved you were not enjoying the situation, and the killer robot just centimeters away from you seemed to back off. He announced something about a party pooper, and the lights clicked off once more.

“WELL, YOU MUST KEEP US UPDATED! WE HAVE ALL BEEN WORRIED FOR YOUR WELLBEING, YOU KNOW!” Papyrus declared, and you could practically hear that cape of his fluttering in the nonexistent wind behind him. You giggled into the phones mic, and you reassured him that you would start doing just that. Mettaton had already rolled away by now, and you mumbled a farewell before hanging up on the kindhearted skeleton.

With a sigh and now abandoned lab, you decided you should probably explore the area. Sure, you knew the skeleton household’s layout like the back of your hand, but this place was yet another unknown area to you. In your wrap up with Mettaton, you hadn’t even taken notice of the huge LED screen showcased near the first room of the Lab. Everywhere you walked, its display was focused on you and your movements, its whirring accompanying the currently silent area. To make sure it wasn’t just an eerily accurate simulation, you waved your arms around, only to find it was not some odd recreation of your being.

A sigh slipped through your lips, and you let your shoulders slump your weight into your pockets, hands now carrying the nonexistent burden. Your paranoia was already through the roof, and now knowing you’d been watched simply amplified it. Were cameras placed throughout the entire Underground? Now that you think about it, many of those bushes you’d seen were pretty displaced… Maybe that’s where the cameras were hidden. You guess it made sense? They were all searching for a seventh soul, afterall.

Your attention split when you noticed an escalator leading its way to a second floor, and you quickly boarded it. It slowed under your weight, probably not used to such heavy metals boarding its all too convenient vertical transportation method. As you reached the top, your eyes widened as you realized this was something that resembled a high schooler’s room. Posters of various anime characters littered the walls, a wooden framed one highlighted above a table littered with beakers and figma. Your eyes were drawn to their handiwork, and a smile graced your face as you realized they were all in pretty good condition for having been tossed down here.

Sure, there were scuffs of paint here and there, but other than that, their conditions were really nice. Now, you couldn’t help but wonder how all these posters made their trip down here without being waterlogged or ripped in some fashion. In the back of your mind, you somehow thought of wiggling fingers and a facetious murmur of “magic”. You scoffed at the dumb thought, and redirected your focus to continue exploring the room.

A bookcase was perched in the corner, it surrounded with an erray of colorful potted plants. Its contents were yellowed manga, little rips present at the spines and coffee stains coating the covers. They all looked well loved, but starkly contrasted against the thick books labeled with different scientific subjects.

‘ _Chemistry_ ’, ‘ _Physics_ ’, ‘ _Aerodynamics_ ’, ‘ _Molecular Structures of Light Forms_ ’, there were so many different books of such a rich subject that you practically drooled, the nerdy side of you shivering with the crave for knowledge. Your fingers skimmed the dust coated book covers, before they settled on your favorite subject, _Biology_.

It was amusing how you didn’t even realize how dust shouldn’t be on books down here, since it might as well be rotting flesh, but it slipped your mind because you were conditioned otherwise. Books were your therapy, so to realize something like that was a death sentence of the finest. After skimming through the pages a bit, you let out a raspy breath, shutting the book with a sneeze. Jeez, these hadn’t been touched in a while, huh?

Your somewhat newly obtained phone buzzed in your pocket, and you couldn’t help but wonder why everyone felt obligated to call you today. The caller ID was unknown, causing you to frown. Trained by nature, you quickly pressed the answer button, and held the device to your ear.

“Hello?”

“ **T** H _E_ y **r’** **e** **Cc** o _ **min**_ **_G_** sO _ON_.”

 

 


	22. Trepidation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A visit from someone you’re quite fond of.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [tumblr](http://madjicks.tumblr.com)

The glitched, cryptic words did nothing to draw you out of your stupor, the line hanging up almost immediately after it uttered that sentence. You stared at the phone with furrowed brows, trying to figure out who and what could have sent such an ominous message. Who were ‘they’? There was no context to the delivered phone call, but you simply chose to ignore it and slip the device back into your pocket. With a sigh, you made your way back down to the ground floor via escalator, and let your feet tap along the tile in a rhythmic beat as you walked.

It was one of the reason you’d loved ballet flats, they could resemble dull tap shoes that you could flap against certain floors. Every clap echoed in the all too large room, and it was interesting to watch the security monitor take in your every move. You weren’t dancing, per say, but the way your feet skid along perhaps resembled it in some odd fashion. A soft laugh breached your lips, and you stopped your shenanigans. If what Mettaton said was true, Alphys would most likely not be around for a few hours at most, so you decided to investigate her computer desk.

Sure, you would never let someone go through your stuff, but you were bored and left alone. Curiosity always seemed to get the better of you, anyways. Papers had been scattered across the table, all adding to some sort of organized chaos. Her computer was just as old as Papyrus’, even if a bit brighter screened and less buzzy. There were enough humming electronics around here anyways. They made the place feel eerily alive.

Your hand made its way to the mouse, clicking various tabs that were left open. Undernet seemed to be the most popular website down here, and something akin to Wikipedia was open in another tab. Maybe it was more accurate than your version that you’d grown used to, but there was no way to find out unless you desired to. Which, you did, of course. So, this ended up with your index finger clicking against the button on the mouse, dragging your split attention to the now selected tab.

It was funny how everything down here was a parody of things you had up on the surface, and you couldn’t help but wonder if they had some sort of connection to it. Maybe someone printed out some papers and threw them away, it seemed much more likely. Your eyes skimmed across the screen, trying to soak in any knowledge you could find on here. The tab had been open to the SOULS search, and you were once reminded of your own. Maybe, just maybe, you could find something pertaining to its disgustingly ugly appearance.

Scrolling down the page as your eyes guided along the long, drawn out, information overflowing sentences, they fell ever so slightly. Up on the surface, you’d always indulged yourself on reading Wikipedia articles, but usually you were wrapped up in blankets, waiting for sleep to cradle its arms around you. Without any type of stimulation to keep you from sleeping, reading heavy like this only proved to be more difficult than you would have liked. But, your focus was snatched by something labeled SOUL TRAITS, and you dug into the newfound writing.

‘ SOUL TRAITS are something most common within human beings. Monsters do not possess these as strongly as humans, since their souls are instead encased by a soft aura. Due to minimal research being found from before the war, we do not have much of a grasp on whether humans have something similar. Monster Souls are much different, especially since they are downfacing as opposed to humans, whose souls are tilted upwards. ‘

So, monster souls were different, which wasn’t too surprising. You both had your own appearances. You continued to read on, your attention grasped with an iron grip by such a simple hook.

‘ There are seven different SOUL COLORs as of 1372. SOUL COLORs are used to determine what moral is most dominant within a human, it being uncommon within monsters due to being made of magic. Each color holds its own definition. As of 1829, Doctor ▬▬▬ conducted research on the couple souls we had harvested from fallen children, even so much as hypothesizing that there could be many more colors that were yet to be discovered. The reason we conducted research on children that had fallen was due to us not having the ability to pick and choose, and simply stuck with what we were given.

Child souls are significantly more powerful than that of an adult, since they are not corrupt and latch onto childhood naivety. The mages that set up the Barrier were adolescents, trained from birth wizards that honed their affinity for magic. Therefore, we must gather data on said SOULs to enact a way to shatter the Barrier. ‘

Normally, you would have paled at the thought of slaughtering innocent children, but you understood these monsters reasoning. And, looking back at it, this had spanned over more than 600 years, something you couldn’t even fathom suffering through. It wasn’t like you hadn’t noticed how depressed all the monsters down here seemed, never knowing the taste of fresh air. You ignored the clicking of the door behind you, once more becoming enamoured with the article.

‘ After the old king perished due to losing his immortality to child baring with the queen, his position quickly shifted onto Prince Asgore. Asgore Dreemurr was left to carry on the family name, and therefore, be the victim to the barrier sealing. He fought in the war aside his wife, Toriel Dreemurr, before being brought to his knees by talented magicians. The monsters had lost their two strongest leaders, therefore having to surrender their freedom to these creatures they used to coexist with in peace.

‘ Approximately 209 years after the Barrier was created, Doctor ▬▬▬ became the most well renowned royal scientist of our kind, even inventing ways to create a synthetic soul. His work was inspiring, causing the new, upcoming scientist, Alphys Tyran to become his protégée. She was almost as brilliant as him, yet with his mysterious disappearance after researching ways to cool the CORE, she fell into a deep, crippling depression. ‘

Wasn’t it weird to have your information out in the open like that? Guess it made sense, since there were only about 2000ish monsters down here, so word was sure to spread fast. Did Alphys even consent to this?

‘ Before the Royal Scientist had vanished, he created two lifeforms that were supposed to hold synthetic souls within their bodies. They were two skeletons, who were raised by the orphanage in the Capitol. No one knows where they are now due to their mysterious disappearance, almost as if they were trailing in their creator’s footsteps. ‘

The wiki article slowly disintegrated into nothingness, being plagued by glitched pixels and odd unicode characters. It was illegible to anyone, and you were slightly annoyed because the article had swerved off track much too quickly. Your face twisted into a frown, only before you were tapped on the shoulder, whipping around so quickly that you fell out of the office chair.

“I-I’m sorry! I didn’t m-mean to scare you so bad…” The voice made you almost instantaneously relax, and you pushed yourself off the ground with a laugh. Your eyes brightened as they made contact with Alphys’, and you brushed your pants with your hands, ridding of any debris.

“It’s no prob, Alph. I was the one who was snooping.” You smiled somewhat nervously, running your hand over the back of your head, rubbing away a forming goose egg. She laughed good heartedly, and readjusted her chair that had turned over. She pushed the power button on the tower, and the screen quickly shrunk in on itself. Man, you hadn’t seen a computer do that since you were little.

“T-There’s nothing on there that’s harmful, I p-promise.” If she were anyone else, you would have been alarmed by her ticks, but you knew this was Alphys, and that was just her normal personality. You slipped your hands into your pockets, and slumped in your stance. “Anyways,” you clipped her shoulder with the palm of your hand, “why didn’t you tell me you were such a weeb?”

Her brows furrowed, but her eyes squinted with confusion. “A, uh, what?”

“A weeb. You like japanese stuff, anime, manga, figma, y'know. Right?” The way her face flushed was admirable, and your grin only grew wider. She shrunk in on herself, and now said grin faltered ever so slightly. “I didn’t mean it in a bad way. I like it too.”

Her moods were all over the place right now, and suddenly she was in full blown anime mode, speaking more anime-tedly than you’d ever seen her. Hehe, another pun filed off to tell Sans sometime later. Apparently, she was going on about some anime called ‘Mew Mew Kissy Cutie’, which, by description, almost fit the same plotline as Tokyo Mew Mew like a glove. You barked out a few laughs at her antics, and drifted off mentally as she rambled on without stopping.

Your mind was too distracted by the fact that souls were real, and apparently more complicated than you thought. Also, the husband Toriel spoke of was the King? Did that make her a Queen? The way your eyebrows scrunched together pensively seemed to alert Alphys of something completely opposite of what was happening, making her mouth shut close. “Why’d you stop talking? Get it out, man.”

“I-I just t-thought…” Her claws clacked together, and you crouched down to get on her eye level. “Nah, you’re not bothering me, if that’s what you’re trying to say.” Her gaze softened easily, and you internally smirked at your soft words. She was easily convinced, even if you weren’t lying. Her excited words didn’t bother you in the least, but, sadly, you just couldn’t contribute to them in any way. Your mind was other places, other more...important places.

Would your soul even be viable for the Barrier to be shattered? Really, it wasn’t as pure and powerful as they described a child’s, and your teeth grinded together in your mouth. Your fists clenched and your face darkened, eyes suddenly taking on a hard look and your jaw popping as you violently grid your teeth. Being angry was not one of your preferred emotions, and all you knew is that you have to leave this lab as quickly as possible. You had someone to talk to.

“Hey, Alphys. Sorry to interupt, but I have to head out now. Trying to get to Asgore, and what not.” The way her own eyes hardened made you frown, but you ignored it and slipped your phone out of you pockets as you walked by. Swiping through your contacts to call a particular skeleton, you were oblivious to Alphys’ endless onslaught of warnings.

You left the lab almost in a rush, ignoring every bit of what Alphys said. Your face was blank as you listened to the phone ring. One, two, three, fo— Finally picked up his phone.

“hey.”

“Hey,” you smiled, even though you knew he couldn’t see it. Maybe he could hear it in the tone of your voice. Clearing your throat, you opened your mouth to speak once more, nuzzling the phone into the crook of your shoulder. “So, I got ahold of a computer with a Monsterpedia page and it was about SOUL TRAITs. Do you know anything about them bad boys?” You slurred your tone casually, even though you were pretty nervous to ask this simple question. It couldn’t hurt to ask him, though.

“souls, huh? i haven’t talked ‘bout those since my old man slipped.” Oof, bad topic it seems. You understood how hard it may be to speak of fallen family members, so with a clearing of your throat, you tried to end the topic with little to no success. “don’t worry about it. i’ll tell ya everything you wanna know. but,” he paused, and you listened as a sigh pushed through the microphone into your ears. “could you come home? we miss you.”

You’d only been gone for a couple hours you thought, but after checking the clock at the top of your phone’s screen, you realized it was past midnight. Time flies fast when you almost die, huh. “O-Oh.” Not the response you were looking for, and it came out rather blandly. “Sure, let me hit up rivers.”

“rivers?”

“The riverperson.” He let out a laugh, causing you to smile once more. Hearing his voice in a non tense manner was pretty relaxing. “if you want, we can go for a trip in the void again. i can pop by.”

“No! There’s no need, I have legs.” The grunt he let out made your smile falter ever so slightly, but you were already making your way back into Alphys’ lab. Hopefully, she was asleep by now. “can we talk until you get back?” A flush speckled your face, and your hands shook a little around the device in your right one. “I guess?”

You really didn’t want to go all the way back to Snowdin after all of this, but sleeping sounded really nice right now. He responded with a blunt confirmation, and then babbled about how Papyrus had missed you. Why were they so attached? You were a simple phone call away, and you knew Papyrus had your number since Sans had put in all the contacts.

“Sans?”

“yeah?”

You contemplated if you should ask this question, your stomach aflutter with hypothetical butterflies. He’d done it for you plenty of times, so maybe it was time to return the offer? You cleared your throat with trembling lips, and held your phone with sweating palms.

“Do…” God, this was hard to do. Why couldn’t you just say it? You closes your eyes tight, and stopped in your tracks. With a deep breath, you uttered a quiet question.

“Do you wanna, um, go out sometime? Grillby’s, or something?” The line was dead silent, and the anxiety pooling in your stomach was near drowning worthy. You heard a hearty laugh come from the other side, and it clenched within you.

“i thought you’d never ask.”

 


	23. Weak Fantasy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Much too many of these recent occurances, yes?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> edit; i've made an official tumblr for this fic! feel free to send me asks there and what not
> 
> [tumblr](http://madjicks.tumblr.com)

“I wonder what she is up to, I have not received a single message from her.”

“probably because you never gave her your number, and you know how bad the ruin’s service is.”

She let a frown slip across her muzzle, snuggling further into the corner against the door. It had become rather unkempt as of late, since she hadn’t a chance to tidy it up due to her own distractions. Her paws mulled around each other, warmth from fire magic bubbling in her veins keeping them from jittering. She wasn’t angry, per say, but more homesick. Toriel truly had missed having face to face company, even if you were a bit more than just peculiar.

“knock knock.” His voice stirred her out of her thoughts, and she let out a tame laugh. “Who’s there?

“avenue.”

“Avenue who?”

“avenue felt this way before?” Her eyes settled on the vertical gash on the purple stone, almost as if she could see right through its densely packed material. What an odd question, so of course, she followed it up with her own.

“Whatever do you mean?”

If she could see him fully, she could probably imagined him squirming to find an answer. Or, maybe not. He’d always seemed so confident in his manners, and she couldn’t help but wonder if she had felt this way before. No, not in a romantic way, but almost as if she were plagued by deja vu. Her routine did feel a bit off as of late, and even Muffet’s frequent visits from past had dwindled to absolute rarity.

“it’s hard to put into words. maybe like…” She could hear the clinking of something hitting another. “this time feels altered in some way, like the human that passed through here shouldn’t have.”

“That is a horrible thing to say!” She barked, suddenly glaring at the violet doors with newfound anger. How could he? She was sure he had taken a fond liking to you, since she had as well, but apparently her thoughts were much the opposite. “no, i don’t mean in a bad light. i mean, like someone else was supposed to be here in her place.”

She blinked foolishly, blushing for her faulty misconception. How silly. Well, he wasn’t… Wrong. As much as she disliked admitting it, Sans had been quite correct. JP was an adult, so her being sent through here was much unlike a child wandering their ways throughout. Perhaps that was why Toriel had been so quick on pushing her away in a hurry, making sure she had no ways to reattach herself to Toriel’s fragile state. Children were much more easy to entertain, anyways.

“I suppose so. She did not feel like the same humans that I am used to… As someone who used to befriend adults, I know it is not that either.” Then, what could it be? For sure, her soul was rather unique, but it wasn’t maleficent. She just didn’t radiate hatefulness. Even if when Toriel saw her stats for the first time that she had to take a second look. But its putrid state was not from personal beliefs. More from...Past trauma, is what she believed. She’d never met a human nor monster with such abysmal HOPE such as JP.

“my thoughts exactly. she doesn’t feel like a normal human.” She reminisced her days of dilly dallying with the average mage or two, relishing in their all too beautiful magic of bringing the light to humanity. And, as all the children had fallen almost a hundred years later; none of them fell with the same talents as the teenagers from past times. Her eyes widened.

“I…” She wondered if she should confess such a sudden thought to this unknown monster, even if their friendship had grown to be inadvertently strong. Her lips curled down into a frown, her paws now grasping even tighter around themselves. “I do believe she could have untapped magic of some sort… It may explain why her soul is so chaotic, in a ways. It is collapsing in on itself due to the constant flood of stress she endures.”

The voice of her counterpart had fallen silent, and she could not shake the thought of him leaving due to her pregnant pause between syllables. Had he gotten bored, some way? But, as she heard snow crunch while his body shifted, her hesitance melted into nothingness; she had been happy that her companion had not abandoned her.

“i see where you’re coming from, i guess. but, as someone who’s never personally met any human associated with wicca, i’m blind to the signs.”

“I would not say Wicca, perhaps, but most likely olden sorcery. She reminds me very much of young Patty who traveled through here long ago.”

“ah, ol’ blue? miss’em.”

Toriel’s eyes clouded with unwelcome nostalgia, paws gripped together to somehow smooth out her approaching tears of remembering another of the fallen. Such a sweet child, left to die by her own hands. She knew how horrible to die by burns felt, and she had never a day without guilt. To be quaint, she was thankful that Sans had quickly moved to another topic.

“but, maybe. i see what you mean. i do have other news, although.”

“Oh? Has your brother done something?” The good hearted laugh that rang through the door caused a warm smile to slip onto Toriel’s worn face, her hands now resting gently in her lap. “oh, nah.” A few more chuckles accompanied his clarification, and she couldn’t help but wonder what could have happened.

“so, me and jp… kind of, uh…” He sounded embarrassed, and a devilish grin now replaced Toriel’s soft one. Had he finally found a lover? She had known that he had taken her rejection from the past not too well, but for him to find another was definitely well needed. Her eyes glinted with mischief, and she readjusted herself on the concrete. “ah, to hell with it. we’re soulmates.”

Woah. She had never expected something as strong and severe as that, but it surely explained a lot. Like how JP had been so desperate to explore the basement, no matter Toriel’s incessant warnings of its dangers. Her own soul ached at the remembrance of soul entwining, but she also let an aged smile replace her previously less mature one. “That is wonderful, Sans! Congratulations!” True mirth fluttered within her red jewel-like eyes, and her paws clapped together. “That is quite peculiar, though. Her soul is so broken that…”

“i know what you mean. when i pulled it out for our first encounter, i saw the state it was in. was kinda tense between us after that.” She couldn’t help but feel as if he was leaving something unsaid, but she wouldn’t dig for private information; that was not her cup of tea. “Well, let us speak of something other than her, if that is okay with you.” His grunt of affirmation simply made her know he was thankful for it. Seemed he was still a nervous monster, soulmate or not.

“i know i haven’t been around much, but what have you been up to?”

She mulled over her thoughts for a proper response, and her eyes lit up as she latched onto a perfect one. “It has been rather boring around here, especially sans human.” Her cheeks bunched up beneath her eyes from her facetious smile, and she patiently listened for his laugh from the other side of the door.

But, it never came.

Tone significantly dampened now, she waited just a little longer, but the area was much too silent to signify any sign of life. She shifted somewhat uncomfortably, before wrapping her knuckles against the door, granting no success to her re-establishing of verbal contact.

With a saddened sigh, she brushed off the back of her robes and made her way back up the stairs. Why had he disappeared so suddenly, at such a good pun too? She would just have to make it sometime again, yes?

She was stirred from her thinking by a pecking on her door, and she hurried over excitedly. She never received visitors, so to have one was quite exhilarating!

But, she didn’t know that a stout child holding a knife would greet her with shut eyes and a deep frown.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> writing a chapter based around toriel proved to be difficult, especially when this chapter was ORIGINALLY going to be yet another frisk, chara, and gaster one, but i decided against it. sorry for it being cut short, but its not supposed to be a long, investing chapter like the others. its a simple transition into the climax of the plot.
> 
> see ya in a week


	24. Brittle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things change?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> whats up. i know this chapter ends pretty abruptly but im tired of writing it lmao.
> 
> reminder that theres now an official tumblr! go ahead and see what i draw for this fic and send questions... i hope

“No! Ignore the knife, we found it by the boardwalk.”

“We…?”

They grinned in delight, and slowly motion for their friend to accompany them from behind the cellar. A small smile had ever so slightly faltered on their pale features, but it was clear who they were. Their rosy cheeks and saccharine smile were hard not to recognize. Their red eyes stared at up Toriel with a sort of… Warmness, most would say. Perhaps Frisk would not claim this, but they knew Chara did not always have the fondest outlook towards motherly figures.

“...Greetings, mother. Long time, yes?” The tears that flooded the mother’s eyes could have put out the most dangerous of wildfires, and she quickly lurched at the now taller figure with said liquid pouring down her cheeks. Chara had grown significantly older in the Void, since time passed much faster there. The most important thing about it though, is it gives you magical attributes due to being one area of every substance you could ever imagine, yet nothing at all. Toriel’s paws clamped on Chara’s shoulders, and she looked directly into their eyes.

“I...I thought you had died? Where have you been all these years, my child?” Chara stared down at Frisk, a now solemn look in their features, and they slipped their hand into the other’s. “It does not matter, does it? I am here now, and with one I love.”

Chara smirked as they watched Frisk’s dark face color ever so slightly, and a small giggle accompanied them squeezing their hand. “It shaint matter, now. May we come for tea?” Toriel nodded quicker than ever, and quickly ushered the children into her abode.

It was different from previous timelines, or even the time Chara had visited here when they were but a child. Seeing things through their own eyes was honestly jarring, since they’d only ever examined as a spectator by Frisk’s side. To be within the physical realm once more… It felt as if it were a blessing. Even if it had taken numerous amounts of soul shattering to finally piece together Chara’s newly born one, it felt every moment precious as they took their new steps into this foreign, but oddly familiar, home.

Yet… Something felt off, and surely Frisk felt it too. The entity could feel their partner’s growing anxiety, and quickly dragged them into their old, makeshift room from when they’d stay here as a child. “Come, let us talk.”

“But, my children, should we not sit around the table and drink tea?” Chara put up a hand to signify that they had made up their mind, and Toriel quickly looked away with a saddened look to her features. Perhaps that was just a tad bit harsh, but it got Chara’s ever wavering point through. They lead Frisk successfully into the room, and took in how it was no longer cluttered like previous timelines.

Their hand clenched, and they looked down to see Frisk starting to sign something. ‘It is clear she tidied up the place, we must remember to feign ignorance to JP having come through here, okay?’ With a genuine, warm smile, Chara nodded their head, and quickly slipped onto the floor. “Shall I start a mental link?” Frisk nodded their head, frizzy hair bouncing along with the affirmation. Chara closed their eyes, and tried to hone in on their minor amounts of practice magic within such a damaged soul, and they couldn’t help but wonder if monster food, or even healing magic, could somehow put it back together even stronger than they had.

With a click, their souls were now connected through a mental link, almost as if they had two cell phones engrained within their chests, linked to their mental thoughts. “ _What is so dire that you must establish a link? Are my hands too fast for your slow mind?_ ”

Chara snickered at the weak jab, and playfully smacked the top of Frisk’s forearm. They knew it was simple banter, and it was nothing to be worried about. Yet, Chara’s previously rare playful mood had dithered, and it was now replaced with that of an aged soul. “ _I haven’t a clue about this place, surely you know.”_

“ _Why not? Haven’t you watched me plenty enough?_ ”

“ _Watching and experiencing are quite the difference, my dear_.” They watched with facetiousness clear in their features as Frisk crossed their arms over their chest, cheeks puffed with newfound annoyance. “ _And, yes, do not worry, I have watched you do enough for a lifetime. I’m sure you want to finally set these poor monsters free, it does get boring after a while._ ”

“ _You could say that._ ” The two stared at each other, and Frisk’s constant stoic expression simply made Chara’s normally animated face falter ever so slightly. With a truly exhausted sounding sigh, Chara pushed themself off of the ground, and made their way over to one of the near closets.

“ _The right side was always mine. Asriel took the left._ ” They looked at the closet with newfound and rather unwelcome nostalgia, teeth slightly grinding to hold themself together. Their hand was clenched tightly at the door of the wardrobe, and they slipped one of the sweaters out of it. “He always had more stripes than me.” They spoke, not bothering with the link now, more trying to hold themself together than anything.

Frisk watched them wistfully, wondering if they should interfere with Chara’s endless quiet chatter to themself, but they eventually decided against it. They could hash out their own inner demons, Frisk was sure of it. They simply fiddled with their hands as Chara figured out their nostalgia bomb, trying to find a way to distract themself from boring routine. Yes, this was rather new since Frisk had never been allowed to open the closets, but it also felt so odd to have Chara accompany them. In the flesh, not just spirit.

“I can hear you.” Chara mumbled, causing Frisk to jump and let out a breathy laugh. They had forgotten the SL for just a moment, for which they were quickly reminded of. Deciding that accompanying Toriel was a much better idea, they quickly uttered something across to Chara, alerting them of leaving.

“I am not in control of you, anymore. Do as you like.” Chara’s raspy voice caused a smile to flash on Frisk’s face, and they quickly slipped out of the room. The door shut with a soft click, and they made their way over to Toriel. She had been sitting in her recliner, reading a book that didn’t seem like the one she had always read in previous timelines. It had various stickers on the front, mainly flowers, and she was flipping through it with a solemn look.

Frisk tapped her arm to stir her from the trance, and she looked over to them with small, sad eyes. Yet, something within them was warm. She closed the book, before Frisk quickly flailed their hands to signify that they were interested in reading along with her.

“I’m sure you would, but it is not a book to read.” She seemed evasive, but Frisk had been determined to learn this new piece of information. “It is a scrapbook, my child. Of my _family_.” The way she emphasized family only made one’s soul hurt deeply, but she let out a dismissing sigh. “But, none to worry. Would you like to assist me in baking a pie?” Frisk nodded eagerly, signing something about how they wanted a chocolate pie to share with Chara. Toriel grinned brighter than Frisk had ever seen, and suddenly, they felt some sort of connection with the elderly monster.

Chara was still digging endlessly through their old, dust covered, things. The way dust covered their fingers was rather morbid, but they knew it was from being untouched. Everything had been in its place from before, even if it was a bit more tidy. Knowing that seven children had slept, and even possibly stayed, in this room after they had died made them shiver. This house held sadness with an iron fist, and it was clear Toriel being here did not help at all. Thinking of family, Chara couldn’t help but wonder where Flowey had been.

Perhaps he has not sensed their presence as of yet? There has never been a human down here with more than just themself, and for another to be making her way through the middleground, he was probably too distracted in watching her every move. That was fine, though. It gave the two one less distraction to mull over.

“ _Chara? We made something for you_.” Frisk called through their mental link, making Chara blink out of their current mullings. “ _Ah, yes. Quite a delight._ ” They dusted off their hands, and pulled themself off of the floor.

“What is it? If I may ask.” Frisk quickly signed something, causing a big grin to spread onto Chara’s face. “My, how generous. A housewarming gift.” Frisk flashed Chara one of those rare smiles that they’d always loved. and they felt their already rosy cheeks warm ever so slightly. They slipped their hand into Frisk’s plump one with a big smile, and made their way into the dining area.

“Hello, again, Toriel. A little blue and pink striped bird told me we have something to indulge upon?” Toriel’s face lit up with one could describe as a mix of joy and realization. It was an ugly portrayal upon her features, but Chara never found her to be much of the term ‘ _beautiful_ ’. “Yes, my child! Me and your dear have crafted a chocolate pie. Give it a try, please?”

How peculiar. It seemed the goat was giving them distance for the first time ever, and they couldn’t identify if it were due to supressed grief, or violent surprise. Either way, Chara couldn’t care any less. They had no respect for this woman, especially after what she had done to their father. Horrible. “Delightful.” Chara murmurred, sitting down in one of the chairs with a quiet grunt. Frisk was starting to take notice of their evergrowing uncomfortability, and fiddled with their hands to try and dull their ever growing anxiety.

Toriel had sliced up the pieces with ease, and layed them gently across from the two adolescents. The crust had been flakey, melted chocolate making the leftover crust dissolve ever so slightly. Since Chara had little to no appetite as of now, they simply picked at the dessert with lethargy. Toriel knew they liked chocolate when it was not melted, so to make a pie like this was foolish. And, then they remembered that Frisk had helped with this, and guilt all too suddenly plagued their mind. Ah, guess they will take a stab at it for them.

They dug their fork into the front of the slice, and moved it up to their mouth, hand cupped just below it to prevent chocolate spilling anywhere. Clutter was something they greatly detested, which was rather funny, since Frisk had always been one to have clutter. Exceptions are made for the ones they truly love, it seems. They had slipped the morsel into their mouth, and their eyes widened with delight. This was actually quite delicious.

“What have you changed about the recipe? Your pies were never this good back then.” The words had tumbled out of their mouth before they could stop it. and they quickly slipped a hand to hover in front of their lips. Toriel let out a laugh of mirth, and sat her fork on a napkin beside the plate. Her eyes had softened significantly, and she stared at the two with an olden look.

“I have changed much, my child. I do hope you realize this.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is the last frisk and chara chapter for now. we’ll get back to the main plot next chapter. see ya next week!
> 
> [tumblr](http://madjicks.tumblr.com)


	25. Banter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Why do you find this so joyous?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im reallt tired and im sorry for the late chapter. as a treat, this one is 2k words longer than usual, so i hope that makes up for it at least a little bit.
> 
> [tumblr](http://madjicks.tumblr.com)

It felt almost as if there were a secondary presence that had joined the Underground along with you, but you shook the thoughts away. You would not let anything get to you tonight; this was your night to enjoy and relax a bit more than usual. Yes, your anxiety had been unfurling within you, but you tried to keep it relatively in check by fiddling with your hands.

When you returned to Snowdin, Papyrus had launched at you with a bone crushing hug, and bombarded you with questions. It seemed that he had overheard your phone call with Sans, because he was going on constantly about his dating manuels, how to dress up, proper manners, etcetera.

“Papyrus, don’t get me wrong, I understand the situation between me and your brother, but…” You rubbed your back with a downcast face. “This isn’t really a date, per say. We’re just hangin’ out a bit.” As always, Papyrus immediately took your statements in buoyancy, clasping his hands together around yours. The all too quick motion made you jump with wide eyes, but you relaxed after quick internal reassurance.

“PLATONICISM IS JUST AS IMPORTANT AS ROMANTICISM! I BELIEVE THAT THE TWO OF YOU WILL HAVE THE GREATEST OF TIMES WITH MY AID.” His cheery voice always brought a smile to your face, and you hastily nodded. “BUT, DO YOU DESIRE TO PURCHASE NEW CLOTHING?” He seemed somewhat nervous to ask this question, and you couldn’t figure out why for.

“I-I guess? But, I don’t want to drain you of any money… I don’t have that much.”

“NONSENSE! THE GREAT PAPYRUS SHALL TAKE YOU SHOPPING IN OUR SMALL TOWN!” His newly acquired cape fluttered in imaginary wind, and you giggled between your hands. “Sounds like a plan! When would you like to?”

“WELL, YOUR HANGOUT IS TONIGHT, YES?” You nodded your head, smile bright on your previously disconsolate face. With a ‘NYEH-HEH-HEH!’, he took you out the door somewhat with force, but you didn’t put much resistance into the action. The way he dragged you had directed the two of you to the small store you had visited a few weeks ago, and you grinned with positive memories.

Wow, in little over a month, you had gone from being unnerved by Papyrus’ loud and boisterous nature, to adoring everything about him. He was your light of hope down here, and his endless optimism really helped with the feeling of helplessness. The bell above the door rang into the area, signifying that the two of you had arrived to the shop.

You waved at the purple furred bunny behind the counter, and it took a second for her to recognize you. “Oh, long time no see.” She smiled, returning to bagging a few things for a customer. You turned your attention back to Papyrus, who had already been quite a few meters ahead of you into the store. Seemed he was heading towards the clothing section right off the bat.

“Hey, wait up, you!” You laughed, picking up your pace to match the skeleton’s. He looked down with a smile of his own, which made your face grow even brighter. After turning a few corners of shelves, you found a very lackluster section of clothing. Surprisingly, everything had been in quite decent condition.

“So, I bet you’re thinking I want a dress or something, but I’d prefer something like a shirt and pants, and since this is a hangout…” You sifted your hands through the racks of individual clothing, finding a casual shirt. “Perfect!”

“PARDON MY INTERFERENCE, HUMAN, BUT SHOULD YOU WEAR SOMETHING SO SIMPLE?” You looked at the shirt in your hands, and quickly let out a chuckle. “Yes, I really should. Since this is a thing I’m doing to get to know Sans better, I don’t want him to feel as if he were underdressed in any way.”

“FAIR ENOUGH!” He proclaimed, before losing himself in a section of customized crop tops. You decided that it wouldn’t hurt to get another thing to wear underneath, so you snagged an a-shirt off the rack. Now it was time to locate some pants, and you found a pair of ripped up black skinny jeans, which was totally your style.

You quickly looked around to see if there was a changing room, and located one with relative ease. With clothing slung over your shoulder, you slipped in and locked the door behind you.

A somewhat cracked mirror was on the wall, and you took in how you looked at the moment. Heavy bags were under your eyes, your nose still looked a bit misplaced, your hair was in a rats nest, your back had slumped significantly, and your face was rather swollen. Gosh, you haven’t seen yourself look this much of a mess since high school.

You couldn’t help but wonder if the monsters had taken notice. Sure, not many of them had recognized you as human, but couldn’t they see the telltale signs of exhaustion? The only monster you could think of never getting exhausted was Papyrus, and even you’ve seen something akin to that. Why hadn’t anyone pointed it out?

Even if you were questioning why no one really noticed, you couldn’t help but sigh in relief. Self esteem and good self image were definitely not your strong points, and seeing yourself in such a shoddy appearance didn’t help at all.

Speaking of shoddy, your mind had been clear these past few days after you’d offered to take Sans to Grillby’s. Nothing drastic had happened, you hadn’t had any nightmares, and you didn’t feel as exhausted as you looked. Being with monsters had its stressors, but being around humanity was definitely worse. How everyone pointed out your every flaw up there almost made you selfishly decide to stay down here.

While you slipped on your newly acquired clothes, you couldn’t help but wonder if shattering the barrier was a good idea. Humans were never accepting of each other, and to have mythical, sentient beings brought into a normally hostile race only spelled out disaster; the realization left a bad taste in your mouth. You wiped your lips with the back of your hand, and quickly slipped the t-shirt over your head.

You looked in the mirror, and scrunched up your nose. It wasn’t your best look, but it will have to do for now. You stepped out of the stall after unlocking the latch, and looked around for Papyrus. Were there shoes here? That would help out a lot with your current outfit.

Even if you felt a bit guilty for spending Papyrus’ money frivolously, he did say that you could. You quickly located a small section with various shoes, and you found a beautiful pair of combat boots that fit your look flawlessly.

Digging your phone out of your pocket, you noticed there were a couple texts from Papyrus notifying that he was currently located at the front. You made your way back with your new clothes in hand, along with the boots, and greeted the skeleton. He didn’t hear you, but that's alright. You knew it wasn’t malicious.

After tapping his shoulder lightly, he turned his skull to you mid sentence and grinned. “HAVE YOU FOUND CLOTHES TO YOUR LIKING?” You nodded with satisfaction written all over your face, and softly sat the clothing on the counter. The bunny tapped along the register to put in the total, and quickly muttered it to Papyrus, who handed her a few larger coins than usual.

The two of you left the store with invisibags in hand, and bashfully trudged through the snow on your way to the house. Per usual, Papyrus kicked open the door, causing snow to make its way in and soak the carpet leading into the living room. You let out a laugh, and quickly made your way up to the bathroom.

“Hey, Pap! By any chance, do you have shampoo of any kind?” A shower seemed delightful at the moment, especially since you hadn’t in over a month. Had bigger obligations to focus on.

“WHY, OF COURSE! WE KEEP IT HERE FOR UNDYNE WHEN SHE STAYS.” You heard some shuffling down below, and a door shutting. After he stumbled his way up the stairs in uncontained excitement, you giggled. His hand pecked on the door, and you turned the knob with ease. He set the bottles into your hand, and quickly slipped away from the door frame. You called a quick ‘Thank You!’ before looking at the bottles.

The soap was sparkly, almost as if it had glitter in it. It reminded you of the glitter shampoos on the surface that you’d always wanted when you were younger. While turning the bottles in your hand, you realized that these were Mettaton brand, and let a laugh breach your lips.

After over examining the bottles of soap, you fiddled with the shower knobs to locate which indicated hot and which one cold. It took a few minutes, but you finally figured out the way they worked, and got the hot water running. It was kind of amazing that they had hot water to begin with, especially since the entire town was frozen to the, hehe, Core. With a pleasant sigh, you began to slip your clothes off of your body.

The bathroom had a mirror as well, and when you took off your snow dampened clothes, you also got to take a closer look to your bare body. Your skin was clammy, your body hair had grown quite a bit after not shaving for over a month straight, and there were a few bruises littered around in various spots on your torso. New scars had gathered along your body, one being left from when Sans had shot through your chest. It was right above your left breast, and you couldn’t help but frown. Then, you looked down at your hips, to see the black from the legs almost seeping into your skin. Your frown deepened.

Without even thinking about it, your hand lurched towards the gradient. The mix of skin and a leatherish texture was something you never thought you’d feel, but it was an odd mix. Your legs were still quite a fascinating subject to you, especially since you were now considered half robot. Dude, you were the first proper cyborg in history. That was cool!

You giggled under your breath, and quickly ran your palm underneath the bath faucet, it coming back a little hotter than lukewarm, which was perfect for you. As you stepped in, you almost forgot to grab the soaps off of the counter behind you. and sort of slipped out of the tub before latching onto them. Since you’d now successfully obtained the bottles, you put them on a small column on the side of the shower next to you, and let the water simply run along your body. Now, it was time to think.

Let’s go over your time down here, as a first thought. You had fallen into the Underground due to a sporadic suicide attempt, provoked by all too fast moving hallucinations that messed with your concept of time and vision. After you fell, you were attacked by a talking Flower, and then saved by an anthropomorphic goat lady, who lead you through a place known as the Ruins. Through your walk, you were taught the basics of combat and how monsters only attack you because you’re their soon to be last opportunity to get freed into the world.

The goat lady, aka Toriel, had welcomed you into her home with open arms, and let you shower in her bathroom. She supplied you with clothing and shoes, food and warmth, a place to sleep. Out of curiosity, you’d went into the basement, where you soon had been attacked due to her seeing it as an act of rebellion toward her woes. After you had consoled her, you were shoved into the embodiment of winter.

And then you got shot, no, not by bullet, but by bone. Of all things, a bone, thats origins that are not from your own body, was the one thing that you never expected to breach the soft flesh above your left breast, but apparently, that’s what happened. The scar still left there proved it. Then a skeleton had healed you, or, more tried to, brought you to his house, and gave you soothing, chilled tea. Then said skeleton let you sleep on his couch, and then you met his brother. Shopping ensued, and then a jar of spaghetti sauce was flung at your face, causing your nose to shift in the utmost painful of ways. The way the bridge of your nose was off center was another bit of proof.

Two hangouts later, you’d traversed through Waterfall, and met Undyne, who quickly paralyzed you in ways you could never fathom. The next couple weeks were hell, but then you’d gotten your legs back; Drunken confessions, mental breakdowns, and headbashing afterwards. Sans was in trouble with the law and then out of nowhere confessed to something groundbreaking.

You’d left the house, greeted Flowey once more, met up with Alphys again, or tried to, and instead met Mettaton. He was as ugly as you remembered, but soon you had found out more about SOULs and Monster History. Alphys had greeted you, but you had to leave.

Now you were here, in the skeleton household once more, with water pouring down the back of your scalp. It was incredible how many things had happened in so little time, and only now had it dwelled on you that Halloween was soon. two days to be exact. How did Halloween even work down here? Did monster’s dress up as humans, like a role reversal for what your race performed in?

You let out a chuckle, finding the thought of any of your friends dressing up like a human rather funny. That would definitely be something to marvel at, and not in the glorified way that you normally excelled at. You rubbed the soap into your hair while letting your mind drift to other things. Such as Guin’s new body. Alphys had mentioned something about still working on it, but she could take as long as she wanted. Prescott’s presence made you feel unnecessary grief, something you could do without.

Now, you thought of yourself. Being down here was definitely stressful, but something about the way this species treated you more human than they did up there was incredulous. It’d be a blessing if humanity was more like this, but you knew it’d never happen. At least, not anytime soon. Your race was hell bent on trying to kill each other, yet still somehow had almost nine billion people littering the continents.

Your mouth downturned, but you wouldn’t let the thoughts of your shitty descendants plague you. Maybe you were different, especially since you’d never been prejudiced towards anyone. Speaking of prejudice, that also reminded you of how a lot of monsters down here had used gender neutral pronouns for one another. Even for you, which was shocking, since you’d almost always presented as female, even if you didn’t desire said appearance in the least.

Maybe you could speak with Sans about that tonight, confess to him one more thing about yourself. If you were truly...soulmates, as he claimed, then he had the right to know. I mean, he could be straight for all you know. But, in thinking about it, monsters down here didn’t really have labels. They were just themselves.

You now viciously scrubbed at your body, trying to rid of any dirt left on it due to your outdoor travels. You had never traveled this much outdoors, but it seems ever since you’d fallen into that fateful hole that you’d even lost some weight. Not due to being famished or what not, more because you got so much exercise that your body was finally reacting to it. The pudge that constantly bulged from your mid region had thinned out ever so slightly, but you knew you’d never have the flat stomach most models did, anyways.

Something rather odd had been bothering you as of late. Having no genitals at all had somewhat helped with your bottom dysphoria, but it also threw you completely off kilter. Sure, you had no vagina, but you also had no penis. What did that make you? Nonbinary? Agender? Intersex??? You were confused beyond belief, but decided to file that off for later. As far as you were concerned, you were a man, boobs or not.

Finally, you’d finished scrubbing your skin raw and stepped out of the shower, grabbing the towel off of the hook on the wall. It had that same warm feeling to it that the one Toriel had supplied you with did, so you wondered if all the towels down here had some odd warmth enchantment casted on them. With all the weird magic aspects around you, it really wouldn’t be surprising. You aggressively dried your hair, shaking water all over the shower walls in your crusade towards non wet hair. It was proving to be difficult with how long your hair was, but after a good 15 minutes of violent shaking and drying, you achieved your goal.

Then, you dried your body, and then pulled your new clothes on. You put your socks on your feet, and newly acquired boots to pair. It felt nice to be in something reminiscent of your usual outfit up there again, even if you somewhat missed the easy maneuvering in comfy pants. Something about your legs being snug in pants was satisfying, though.

With a couple coughs to clear your throat, you treaded out of the bathroom, trying to locate Papyrus. Instead, you were met with another skeleton, one that was somewhat shorter than you.

“Oh, hey! Where ya been?” You chirped casually, smiling down at Sans. He was wearing something reminiscent of his usual outfit, but had wore a different hoodie, this one being red, and a pair of jeans. It wasn’t anything too flashy, which you were pretty thankful for. “out.” He replied curtly, causing your smile to wither slightly.

“Well, whatever. You look nice in red.” You grinned full force once more, and he laughed at your antics. “thanks. you look comfy.”

“Being comfy, but still looking good is my game. If I had my red hoodie, I’d complete this outfit to the max.” You giggled, and soon Sans joined in as well. Honestly, you think this is the most positive interaction you two have had with each other in quite a while. The two of you quickly went down the stairs and made your way to the ground floor, waving at Papyrus before you left.

“Onward to Grillby’s!” You called, pointing in the direction of the burger joint. Maybe you could actually enjoy your food this time. Without even thinking about it, you slipped your hand into Sans’ right one, and excitedly made your way to Grillby’s. The thought of greasy food with that magical spark was heavenly, and you were smiley the entire way there.

“what’s got you so happy, smiles?” Sans questioned, and you stopped in your tracks to look down at the skeleton with piercing blue eyes. He squirmed under your gaze, and your smile fell for the first time tonight. You could only guess it wouldn’t be the only frown during this ordeal. “What’s got you so crummy? I told you, we’re gonna have fun!”

He slipped his hand away from yours into his pocket, and your frown deepened. “Why are you so down…?”

“i’m worried.” He mumbled, something you could barely catch in this moment. “About what? We’re getting food.”

“i’m worried that something will go wrong. every time we’ve come here, we end up really angry or sad.” He wasn’t wrong. And, you wouldn’t lie, but you had the same thought. Some type of forced optimism was trying to keep you happy, but seeing Sans like this just dampened the mood. You internally wriggled for some sort of way to cheer him up, even if you knew that he wasn’t telling the whole truth.

“Do you not want to go?”

“no! n-no, i do. i do want to go, it’s just…” You stared at him solidly, and his face softly flushed blue as he went on with what he was saying. “i don’t wanna hurt you again.” You stared at him dubiously, and then broke into body shaking laughter.

“You’re kidding, right? Sans, look at me,” you laid your hands on his shoulders, with a much softer smile on your face in an attempt to calm him. “I’m in a good mood, it’s hard to get me out of it when I’m optimistic. Just kick back tonight, okay, little guy?” He hesitantly nodded, and then the forced smile he put on slowly faded into a true one.

You guys resumed your hand holding, and got back on track to Grillby’s. It was your mission to not let anyone or anything ruin this night of yours, even if it wasn’t supposed to be something super extravagant. You really wanted to make both you and Sans happy, even just one night alone was better than nothing.

The two of you finally got to the restaurant, and the warm atmosphere immediately warmed up your unknowingly chilled body. You were so wrapped up in encouraging Sans to be happy that you hadn’t even taken notice of how red your fingers and cheeks were. Positive that it wasn’t merely from blushing, you rubbed your cold hands together to produce heat by friction. It worked.

Sans had already taken your side when you slid into the booth, and you puffed your cheeks at him. “The other side, mister! You should know how this works by now!” You pawed, playfully nudging his arm with your hand. He let out a warm laugh, and slipped out, now facing you with a lazy smile.

Your mind was on food, which was fitting for this place, when Sans snapped you out of your daze. “have you ever mixed ketchup with a vanilla milkshake?” Normally, people would have recoiled in disgust, but as someone who loved to mix uncomplimentary flavors to try and create something delicious, you beamed. “Actually, yeah! It tastes really good. Have you dipped fries in a milkshake before?”

His browbones curled, showing he was amused but also unsure of your question. “Oh my god, you haven’t? It tastes delicious!” You decided in your mind to have him try it, and slipped your hand into his from across the table. The way your hands fit together flawlessly was near intoxicating, and you smiled even bigger than you thought.

Grillby had come to your booth a couple minutes later, a serviette thrown over his left arm and his hand adjusting his glasses. “It is quite nice to see the two of you once again… Have you decided on what you would like to eat?”

Sans had ordered the usual, a basket of fries and a bottle of ketchup, while you ordered a vanilla milkshake, a basket of fries, and a burger. It had been awhile since you could stuff yourself to the brim, and since you were determined to make this night great, you decided treating yourself wouldn’t hurt. Grillby had scribbled the order out on a notepad, and nodded towards you before exiting the vicinity.

“So, where’ve you been? Me an’ Paps’ve been missin’ ya.” The way you didn’t particularly articulate your words visibly made the skeleton relax, and a soft grin presented itself on your face. “been workin’ with alph.”

“On what?” Your curiosity peaked, internally sort of elated that your theory was right. “‘m helpin’ her with makin’ prescott’s body.” Well, that wasn’t what you were expecting. Why were they so invested on making his body? He seemed rather comfortable being a ghost.

“Oh.” You said rather lamely. You folded your hands on the booth table, and now impatiently tapped your foot while waiting for the food to get here. Guin was still a rather touchy subject for you, since the brother you’d known as dead for 7 years was suddenly alive again. Your eyes filmed with wetness, and you aggressively rubbed at your them. You were determined to not let this night fall through your grasp like usual, but it was slowly beginning to crumble.

“remember that game we played in waterfall? wanna play it again?” That was a dangerous question, and you stared at Sans’ in shock. He seemed to back off from your hard eyes, but you quickly fanned him back. “Sure.”

“do you wanna go first?”

“Sure.” You repeated, words beginning to become more clipped. With a sigh, you mulled through your mind for a good question to ask. What did you not know about Sans? Well, there were plenty of things, but you couldn’t really settle on one of the bunch. Your face scrunched up in thought, and Sans softly laughing at your expression brought you out of your thoughts.

“What was it like? Like, before any of the humans fell?” This question seemed to even make Sans shocked, and you internally grinned. “well…” His own browbones took a turn to furl, and you folded your hands together on the table. “how much do you know?”

“I read a little bit of a wiki article on Alphys’ computer, but that’s about it.” He nodded at your answer, and your gut twisted ever so slightly. “it was decent. i wasn’t alive when the very first human fell, chara.” Chara? Like, the Chara you knew? Interesting. “i was created when the green souled human came down. was working with my dad at the time. we had been working on crafting a synthetic soul to try and shatter the barrier faster and through other means than killing children just to harvest them.” Well, that kept it nice and morbid. Your lips scrunched in dismay, but you tried to hide your reaction as best as you could.

“the most recent human to fall is you, which is weird. before you, we had frisk. their soul was as determined as ever. wonder where they went.” You knew the answer to that question, but tried desperately to not let it show on your face.

“do you know somethin’ i do—“

“Oh, look! Food!” You panickedly interupted, gesturing to Grillby making his way to your table with food in hand. Sans frowned at the way you rudely cut him off, but let it die in his mind like a lot of things you said. Grillby sat down the dinner on your two’s table, and bid you good eats.

“my turn for a question.” Sweat trickled down your hairline, and you never thought a basket of fries would be so interesting. The little grains of salt littered on them, and the slight orangish color to their skin. The way the basket held them with practiced ease, the paper within the basket complimenting the food color perfectly.

“what do you know about those two?”

“Who?” The knowing glare he sent your way was an action to make you playing dumb go down the drain. “A little bit, I guess.”

“elaborate.”

“When I first fell down here, I met an adolescent. They said their name was Chara, and that they ‘recognized my hatred’ or something. Then I was sent away to Flowey.” You cleared your throat, trying to not lock eyes with him at all. “After I, um…” Your face was downcast at the mention of this memory, but you had to get it out. “After I killed you, I met Chara again, but this time they had Frisk by their side. They rambled about how even as their pawn to finally bring resets to an end, I shouldn’t kill any monsters. They lectured me, and I remember crying because of how bad I felt. Frisk was the one to send me away.”

Sans could only be described as pale, and you couldn’t help but shiver a bit. What if he was angry?

“so you _are_ an anomaly.” You grunted, and dug into your quickly chilling fries. “well, that’s good.” His entire demeanor changed, and you stared at him in surprise. “i was worried that you were possessed or something. glad to know that you’re normal.” Your face melted into a smile, and then eventually you started to laugh.

“what’s so funny?”

“I don’t,” you gasped between your laughter, “I don’t know. I just find it funny.” You laugh, and keep laughing. It's SO funny, you can't stop. Tears run down your face.... what? You didn't do that?

It’s not funny.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i always loved that line.


	26. Willful Ignorance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Close the curtains on blind naivety.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for the late chapter. this one was hard to write, and it was actually going to be longer, but im a lazy asshat so no. also this is the end of arc 1 njdnjkfd  
> see ya next week.
> 
>  
> 
> [tumblr](http://madjicks.tumblr.com)

You stared at the silent household.

 

You and Sans had arrived home rather early in the evening due to a mandatory bedtime story, but it was okay. Everything was and will be okay. The only thing you could do was stand around and hope for the best. Now you were wrapped up on the couch in a knitted blanket, letting your thoughts run rampant. For some reason, your eyelids just would not begin to slip down, so you were left to your somewhat normal thoughts.

 

It sucked that the date ended so abruptly. Wait, did you say date? Bah, it doesn’t matter. But, yeah, it ended on… Odd terms. It felt like you two knew each other a bit better as of tonight, but there was still tension between you guys that you couldn’t really put a finger on. All you could really hope for was that he didn’t hate you for tonight’s events.

 

The feeling of yet another presence in the Underground haunted your mind once more, and your lips slipped into a shaky frown. Gut feelings were pretty uncommon with you, so to have one meant something big was going to happen. Not something that you wanted, especially since you were just now getting used to unwavering normality. It was a nice break from all the things that had transpired as of late.

 

Your eyes drifted to the nails on your hands, no longer caked in dirt like they had been prior to your shower, and you couldn’t fight the urge to nibble at them to make them much shorter than they currently were. Bad habit, but it was one you could never seem to really kick. Thankfully, you’d never had an infection of any sort, which was just another weird thing to add to your peculiar body.

 

After successfully ripping the nails off of the tips of your fingers, you winced everytime the pulled skin from some other messy ones would snag on the fuzzy blanket you had wrapped around yourself. There wasn’t much to do in this house when there was no daylight, or any light at all. The only thing you could really do was to stare at the various shapes in the dark due to your eyes not being focused.

 

It was odd to think about how that even Underground, there were daylight cycles. There wasn’t any sun, at all, but there were constant shifts of weather. How’d they even get locked down here, anyway? You’d have to ask someone about it sometime, since the curiosity of such thoughts were rummaging through your head a million miles per hour.

 

When a couple knocks rapped against the door, you were finally stirred you out of your insomniatic trance. You wiped your hands against your pants, and quickly hurried over. Who could that even be at this hour? Last time you checked, it was around 3am, where almost everyone in the Underground was in a short state of comatose. Your hand loosely gripped the knob, and you opened the door ever so slightly.

 

Your head looked left and right outside, trying to find the person who knocked on the door, before your stomach was poked from below. Your eyes met with brilliant red ones, and a smirk to pair on their pale face. 

 

“Long time, no see, partner.” 

 

By first instinct, you slammed the door on their face. You were definitely hallucinating from lack of sleep, and they shouldn’t be here, right? Right? You’re just going insane, but that was really their voice? 

 

“It is not very nice to slam a door in someone’s face, am I wrong?” The way they articulated their words with that snotty tone only made you start to shake, but you knew there was no way you would ever let them into this house. Especially with Sans still being here, he’d flip if he saw who had been behind Chara. The thought poured ice down your spinal cord, and you gripped your arms ravishly.

 

What do you do? You didn’t have someone else to get a second opinion from, and also, how did they get here? Did they kill Toriel? Did they come to kill you?

 

“Stop cowering and get out here, we haven’t come to deliver bad news.” It seemed that they tried to make their usual authoritative tone lessen ever so slightly, with the contraction and all. It took a few very deep breaths to calm your flared nerves before you could even imagine approaching the snow flecked door once more. With an exhale, you took a couple steps towards it, desperately trying to stop shaking.

 

“Please let us in.” A quiet voice murmured, softly tapping on the door with their fist. Either Chara was very good at impressions, or Frisk had decided to bless you with the sound of their voice. This all too suddenly made you relax, and you opened the door once more.

 

The tensity in your body was enough to tear muscles, but you tried to sway your ever climbing anxiety that was bleeding into your outward appearance. Your hand was white knuckled around the door knob, and your teeth were clenched. The teens pushed past you, to which you jumped and tried to block their path.

 

“What is the matter? It is very cold out there, surely you know that.” Chara spoke once more, reigniting the cold sweat along your back. “I-It’s very early… I’m a guest here, s-so I don’t know if I can let you guys in so suddenly and…” You shut your mouth as you saw half lidded eyes from Frisk glare at you, somehow softly? It made you shake even more, and your posture curled in on itself. How were you supposed to approach this situation?

 

A sigh slipped past your lips, and you stepped aside to let them through. You knew you weren’t intimidating, especially since your SOUL was weak, and your figure had shrunk significantly due to so much weight loss. Exercise and malnourishment will do that to someone, low metabolism or not. It was a struggle, but you eventually let your muscles loosen and your feet drag you along to their location. God, it was so hard to put on an air of either confidence or nonchalance. Your pupils were still rather small, which was odd due to such low lighting.

 

“So, um…” You mumbled nervously, almost feeling as if you had become Alphys’ twin sibling. “W-What brings you here? I mean, I’m surprised you got past Tori a-and, uh…” You quickly zipped your lips with the venomous glare Chara sent your way, suddenly feeling very small underneath their scrutiny. It was like you were but a gnat underneath their shoe.

 

“Since Toriel is indeed my mother, it is quite easy to sneak past her grasp.” They smirked at their own antics, and Frisk giggled next to them. Their eyes turned down to the other, and smiled a bit more warmly. “And, for you, it is quite easy to slip through as well.” Chara rubbed Frisk’s frizzy hair affectionately, and you couldn’t help your heart from warming at the gesture. 

 

“Wait, so Toriel is your mother? Sorry… I don’t know too much about you.” It was the truth, and if they had mentioned anything in the past, your shoddy memory had plunged it into no man’s land. Your hands wriggled around each other, trying desperately to calm your still not too soothed nerves. “Could you maybe fill me in?”

 

“I would be delighted. Come, sit next to us.” They patted the cushion next to them, trying to signal for you to come and join them on the couch. You were so wrapped up in trying to cope with the two’s presence that you hadn’t even noticed that they had acquainted themselves. You cleared your throat awkwardly before shuffling over to the couch, somewhat surprised that it could fit all three of you.

 

“Do you know anything?” You shook your head hesitantly, lips drawn back into a disappointed frown of your ignorance. They laughed under their breath, before crossing their legs on the couch. “Ah, well, it seems we will have to be here quite a while.” Their eyes widened as Frisk looked up to them, and they took in their partner’s features. 

 

It seemed that Frisk was asking something of the other, their hands flashing in a multitude of positions. You recognized it as sign language, and grunted as you couldn’t remember your lessons from elementary school. “I do not know, Frisk. I have told you, we cannot gather him for he is scattered across space.” Frisk’s face bunched up, only to be followed with exasperated signs that showed their growing irritation.

 

“Perhaps we can find a way, but for now, we must wait. Remember, he has a grand plan? He is not one to be foolish.” Frisk huffed before settling back into the couch, fiddling with the ends of their sweater sleeves. 

 

“I’m sorry to interrupt your conversation, but who is ‘he’?” Chara laughed once more, before slightly nudging Frisk’s arm with their elbow. “I like to call him this one’s uncle. But, his true name is Doctor W.D. Gaster. He was the previous Royal Scientist, unless something drastic changed in this short timespan.” Wait, that was him? You knew of this guy! And, apparently, it showed on your face, because your eyes lit up in recognition. “I see you have read something about him, care to tell?”

 

“I read a Monsterpedia article about SOUL Traits, and it mentioned him quite a bit. I think it may be him, but his name was blocked out by unicode. Here, let me see if I can find it…” You grabbed your phone out of your pocket, and quickly brought up Undernet and typed something into the search bar. “Uhm…” You scrolled through, and lit up abruptly as you had found your goal.

 

“Here we go! Take a look.” You passed the phone over to Chara, and Frisk crawled along their back to peek over their shoulder. Their finger pushed along the screen methodically, their eyes digging in for information that was long lost. “Interesting… This must be new, I have not ever seen such a site like this when I was among.” You quirked your head to symbolize confusion. They handed you your phone back.

 

“Ah, let me fill you in on that bit of information. You see, long ago, I had perished along with my brother. The prince, if I may say.” Woah, the prince? Like, Asgore? Or…

 

“Not Asgore in his young days. His son, Asriel Dreemurr. He was my very best friend.” Even you could take notice of the solemn look in Chara’s eyes, and you subconsciously held out a hand to take theirs. They smacked it away with hardened eyes. “I am not in need of your dull pity, now, let me finish.” Well, damn. Alright.

 

“As I said, he was my best friend. When I had fallen down here, he had found me. Waking up to find beautiful red eyes lock with my own felt almost as if it were an illusion, but when his paw took mine, I knew everything had been all too real for my liking.” They seemed fond of the memories, but as their face grew sad, you knew it had been too good to be true.

 

“He relayed to me about how everyone here. save for a few lucky monsters, had been birthed into captivity. I felt my heart weaken, and my childish mind had figured out something akin to a plan.” Frisk’s hand slipped into Chara’s, and they gripped it to signify they were going to be alright. “Weeks prior, we had attempted to make a pie for Dad, yet, we had made one of buttercups, not butterscotch. We figured the flowers could substitute for the missing ingredient.”

 

“We were terribly wrong.”

 

“Dad had fallen ill, and all we could feel was crushing guilt for subjecting him to such a hellish ailment. We were children, children who did not know any better. And, of course, Dad’s merciful soul had forgiven us for said reason. He knew we meant no ill will.” Chara let out a stuttered breath, desperately trying to keep their composure together. Even if they had snapped at you for it, you still felt bad for the adolescent.

 

“But, I had formulated a plan. Asriel constantly spoke of how we only needed one human SOUL, and for it to combine with a monster one to breach the barrier. So, after seeing what Asriel and I’s mistake had done to such a monster, a boss monster, nonetheless, I had a brilliant idea.” They paused, and took a gulp of air to settle their nerves. 

 

“I ingested the flowers, eaten them only to bring me to death’s embrace as to free these monsters from their shackles. What I never imagined was how horribly painful it had been. I felt my own organs disintegrate, and my heartbeat slow to a stop, while my newly adopted family cried over my bed. Those few moments before death, you regret everything you have ever done. You regret doing such a horrible deed towards yourself, and when it is suicide, the crippling shame is much worse.”

 

You nodded with knowing eyes, remembering the emotions you felt as you had slipped into the Underground.

 

“I see that you’re familiar. I had hoped you had been. It makes it much easier to explain.”

 

“When you are in such a state of nothingness, especially as someone who is barely skimming their pre-teen years, you are frantic. You want to do everything in your path to prevent the inevitable, your inevitable demise of self doing. It is horrible.”

 

“This...This activates DETERMINATION within you. The struggle to keep living on, and after Asriel had absorbed my SOUL, he obeyed my wishes of passing the barrier and being laid in my favorite bunches of flowers.” Their hands were clenched tight now, tears struggling to break the dams known as their eyes. It was clear that they were not sad, but instead angry.

 

“Those foul humans ruined our plan. Ruined our wishes to simply free the monsters to make them live in peace among this disgusting race that we call ourselves once more. I just wanted to make the beings who gave me what I had always wanted, love, to be happy. To be free.”

 

“I had never imagined what had happened. I never wanted to watch my brother turn to dust from his own perspective. I didn’t want to die so painfully.”

 

“As to be expected, a Prince and his sibling perishing sent the Underground into a flurry. Monsters spoke of rebellion, spoke of downright genocide to the race who had taken so much from them for no reason. Yet, I was left to drift. I watched everything transpire, the way Asgore declared war on humanity, the way Mom had left in a hurry.”

 

“I had to watch as my family fell apart.”

 

You couldn’t even imagine having something so horrible happen to you, yet, at the same time, you understood. You understood Asgore’s grief against humanity, for they had taken everything from him for no reason. You understood Toriel’s sheer anger at Asgore, and for her fleeing to the Ruins.

 

You understood everything, for you had lived through something pretty familiar.

 

“I know where you’re coming from.” You began, hands nervously circling each other as if to find a proper way to settle into one another. A shaky sigh slipped through your lips, and you closed your eyes tight.

 

“Are you under the impression that we do not know of your life? You are nearly identical to me, that is why we have chosen you.” Your eyes opened, and locked with Chara’s. “You are special, in a ways. We are not related, yet we share the same trauma, minus the monster part, yes.” They laughed quietly, hands slipping from Frisk’s grasp.

 

“JP, you are special. You are not like that of other humans. You are your own person, and for that, we respect you. It is why we decided to inflict such a burden upon you, but as we said, this is the final timeline of our lives. We will not begin again after this, for we have no more chances to. If we do… Time will collapse in on itself as we know it.”

 

“Do you understand now? You may not realize it, but you are the true hope of our races. You are the one with the soul of VICTORY, a soul spoke of in legends long forgotten. Have you ever taken notice of how your body does not fall to many things humans are susceptible to?” You nodded hesitantly. “Your SOUL is why.”

 

Without even a second to think, your SOUL was taken out of the center of your chest, you gasping in response. “It is molten, decaying in the way of black due to such a weak will. It is why you have never had any sort of motivation to do anything, it is why you are unique in ways you could not ever fathom with your current state of mind.” In this moment, you had never been so shocked by words delivered to you by a teenager. But, said teenager was wise beyond their years, and the amount of respect you had for them had grown significantly.

 

“You are the Living Victory. It is why your body will not ever perish, unless you absolutely will it to. In your current state of youth, you are unable to. For that, we are thankful.”

 

“Have you ever felt like you are more than one person?” You asked, wondering if they could possibly explain one of the biggest plagues of your shattered mind. You knew it wasn’t schizophrenia, or even DID, so what was it?

 

“It is common for us to believe we are something, or in your case, someone, we are not. With you, you are not just one SOUL. You are many spliced into one, after a makeshift accident done within the Underground long ago. Have you ever been told of the CORE? Or, been told about 1998, where we had been struck with the earthquake that wracked our country?” You nodded hesitantly, since going before you were born was uncharted territory.

 

“That was your birth. You are somewhat of a monster, spliced from the SOULs of fallen children and monsters alike. It…” Chara seemed weary of continuing their onslaught of information, but Frisk’s nod in their direction seemed to encourage them beyond what they could summarize with their own words. “It is why Sans is your soulmate, for he partook in your making the most.”

 

“Doctor Wing Ding Gaster, Sans, and Alphys, as you know them, took part in your SOUL’s creation. You are not one of human nature. It is most likely the case of your magnetism towards social situations. People either adore you to unknowing heights, or despise you for unknown causes.”

 

…

 

You stared at Frisk to see if Chara wasn’t just spouting nonsense, but their confident nod simply made your stomach plummet into nothingness.

 

“What am I?”


End file.
